This Week’s WandaVision Features little Wanda or Vision but does look back at a bunch of familiar faces we’ve seen in the MCU
Do you know that moment in the Wizard of Oz where we pull back behind the curtain to reveal that the great big wizard was nothing but a tiny, crotchety, old man? Well, that’s sort of what we get in this episode, except with S.W.O.R.D. and the backstory of Monica. We also finally get a sense of where the show is heading. Even though many have already guessed the plenty of Easter Eggs and revelations the show’s leaning into correctly already.
For an in-depth look and take on some of the comic’s history behind WandaVision, we Breakdown Everything In This Extended Edition of Yakety Yak: A WandaVision Cast
WandaVision thus far has proven to be a confusing yet entertaining TV show. An homage to the sitcom with more behind the scenes. That’s hinted for weeks as to how something much bigger is happening. Our theories and revelations? Finally revealed here in this episode.
Looking behind the scenes, we are finally given a formal introduction to S.W.O.R.D. learning all about the organization that has been watching behind the scenes. Atop of this, we get to learn about Geraldine’s backstory, whom we have long speculated, is in fact, Monica Rambeau.
Set five years later, this episode also sees a return to a larger tie in with the bigger MCU. Where a missing person case set in New Jersey, along with the aid of the F.B.I. and James Woo from Antman 2, investigates the town of Westview. Which has confirmed to have gone missing. We also get the return of Darcy from the Thor series. Who is now an Astrophysics specialist?
With all the acronyms in these episodes, the revelations are quite a doozy. Showcasing S.W.O.R.D.’s involvement the entire time, though also, Hexagonal patterns, which is most likely alluding to A.I.M. It’s also telling that after Ray Park sends his S.O.S., we had also seen an immediate commercial for a Strucker watch.
The Take
A great episode that pulls it all together, WandaVision shines in finding a sense of direction finally. Now at the halfway point in the season, there are only four decades to go from here until the finale.
In this week’s episode of A Discovery of Witches, we move to the present where trouble is brewing as Peter Knox, Gerbert, and Domenico plot to destroy the de Cleremonts.
Here are key moment to note:
Knox, Gerbert, and Domenic Team Up
Knox heads to Venice where he tells Gerbert that the Madison coven finally cracked and revealed that Matthew and Diana formed their own shadow cabal of three witches, three daemons, and three vampires in secrecy. The witch is sure that whatever the group is planning has to do with the Book of Life. He convinces the old vampire that they need to pool their resources together if they are to stand a chance against them. Gerbert agrees and shares with Knox everything he’s known about Ashmole 782 since the 13th century.
Previously of course Domenico came to the other vampire with a proposal to help destroy the de Cleremonts in exchange for control of Venice.
Marcus Buys Some Miniatures, Meets a Girl
Marcus is tasked by Ysabeau to buy small portraits of Matthew and Diana that surfaced at the Cooper Sinclair auction house in Oxford. These were previously commissioned by Diana for Jack as she and Matthew were leaving for France and then Bohemia in search of Ashmole 782. In the novel Shadow of Night, the miniatures were painted by the artist Nicholas Hilliard, who was renowned for his portraits of the members of Queen Elizabeth I’s court.
There he meets Phoebe Taylor and there’s some clear sparks there. He wants to buy lot 42 for his grandmother, but she reveals that it’s going to be auctioned off and he won’t be able to purchase it outright then and there. Undeterred, Marcus returns to win the portraits, but he can’t get the items until his payment clears the following day. However, things take a turn for the worse when a robbery occurs at the auction house and the miniatures are taken with a missing security guard. Incidentally, Domenico had been tracking the vampire killer and it led him to the very same establishment where he discovers the very dead personnel.
The next day Marcus returns to collect the portraits when Phoebe explains what happened and that the art pieces were stolen. He temporarily leaves to tell Ysabeau the bad news but upon returning asks Miss Taylor out to dinner. She is reluctant at first but gives in. Meanwhile across the street, Domenico’s been staking out the building when he sees the duo heading out on their date. He follows them of course and shows himself to Marcus discreetly, prompting the other man to tell Phoebe that he needs to call his grandmother again for just a moment. The two vampires have a conversation outside where Domenico asks what the other man was doing at the auction house. Marcus asks the same question back and Domenico instead leans in for a deep sniff. He seems to decide that Matthew’s son is not the creature he is tracking and explains that there’s a vampire killing warm bloods, one man on his way to work and last night a security guard at the auction house. He had caught the scent of the killer and found the guard inside the vault and had to clean up the mess before the police found out. Marcus asks Domenico if he took anything, but the other man brushes it off saying that this is serious. The elder male then adds that whoever did this was infected with blood rage. Confused, Marcus thought that his grandfather eliminated the disease centuries ago but Domenico scoffs that apparently that wasn’t the case. The younger vampire is also to make sure that his date doesn’t ask too many questions.
Despite this run in with Domenico, Marcus’s dinner with Phoebe ends well and as they are walking down the street she kisses him before getting into a cab. Later on she texts him and he invites her over to his house for a night cap. Phoebe confesses that she’s searched him online and was surprised that he had no presence on social media and wonders if he’s even really a doctor because how could he afford this place. Marcus says that he is a medical professional and has family money. She points out however that right now and when they were talking about the robbery it seemed like he was hiding something from her. Very perceptive Miss Taylor! But then Marcus kisses her and she is thoroughly distracted as they head upstairs to his bedroom.
Needless to say some passionate times were had but Phoebe can’t help curiosity and while downstairs in the kitchen to get a glass of water, she finds a bag of blood in the fridge and is confused. Wait don’t all doctors have random blood bags in their kitchen? Then she pokes around some more and finds a box of pictures with Marcus throughout the years in an old soldier’s uniform and many more. Sophie finds her there confused with Marcus soon coming down the stairs. The daemon quickly makes her exit leaving the two lovers alone.
Back upstairs Sophie is upset thoroughly believing that Marcus is hiding something from her and the entire situation is weird that all his ancestors look exactly like him. He finally seems to give in and asks her to take a walk. Their talk doesn’t quite go smoothly though as Marcus eventually reveals that he’s an actual vampire and that witches and daemons exists all around her hiding in plain sight. Sophie thinks he needs help and says goodbye.
Emily Tries to Summon Rebecca Again
Meanwhile in Sept Tour, Ysabeau warns Emily and Sarah to stay indoors since Congregation eyes on them right now with Matthew and Diana’s disappearance. Sarah is especially unhappy about the situation feeling like they are trapped in a prison. Em though is still more concerned about figuring out a way to help their niece. She asks her ladylove what if they could talk to someone who had more experience with the Book of Life, aka Rebecca who must have come in contact with it to leave the page for her daughter. The redhead protests that the last time the other woman tried to use the higher magic it had not gone well but Em brushes it off saying that she’s a lot more experienced now. This leads to Sarah freaking out asking her partner to promise her not to try summoning because it was too dangerous.
Em agrees to placate her but of course in the dead of night she goes off and tries it again. This time she is able to conjure Rebecca for a few more moments, but her spirit dissipates before being able to say much.
Gerbert Visits Sept Tour, Outside the Grounds At Least
Ysabeau meets Gerbert outside the boundary of Sept Tour where the man is surprised that they don’t have their conversation in her home. She doesn’t answer and he comments that he’s heard rumors that she’s harboring Diana’s aunts, which of course must be untrue. Ysabeau nods and agrees with him but he presses the matter saying that they broke the covenant by having daemons and vampires in their abode, fraternizing with other species. Cool as ice, she states that it doesn’t concern of her because she’s never met them. Gerbert is apparently worried that her love for Matthew has blinded her, but she asks what would he know of love?
He doesn’t answer and instead goes on and on about how Philippe’s choices were always focused on the preservation of the vampire species and her son’s chosen mate is now in direct conflict with that. Gerbert also tells her that he knows Matthew and Diana are hiding somewhere in time but he wants to know what they are planning. Ysabeau suggests that next time he should just send her an email rather than travel all this way from Venice to just ask her that.
Undeterred, Gerbert brings up the murders in Oxford and how it was done by a vampire infected with blood rage. She wants to know what he expects her to do about that. He of course is using it as a blackmail tool. Gerbert wants her to side with him and he’ll steer any investigation away from her family. Ysabeau though calm asserts that they have nothing to do with this and walks away. He says time will tell.
A Baby on the Way
Nathaniel, Sophie, and Agatha have been staying with Marcus in Oxford to protect their lives under the Knights of Lazarus. It’s suspected that Sophie’s baby will be born a witch and that very notion is unheard of for two daemons to give birth to a different creature. However, we learned last season that Sophie herself comes from a family of witches. The unborn child would be in grave danger if the Congregation found out and taken from her parents to be studied. Marcus and Miriam have been monitoring the pregnancy and currently the baby’s heartbeat is a tad bit slow. Marcus recommends that the future mother give birth in a hospital instead of at home like they originally intended. He would make sure that they were well taken care of and protected. Sophie is reluctant though because it would be more exposed. Still, there was still time to consider it.
Nathaniel and Marcus have a conversation later on where the daemon says that they’ll go to the hospital to be safe in case of an emergency. The two men then talk about the Knights of Lazarus and Nathaniel asks what has the order actually done to help people in the present. With Marcus as the new grandmaster since Matthew went back to the past, the vampire pauses and seems to realize that his friend is right. The weight and responsibility of his new position hasn’t quite settled in yet. The daemon comments that the Knights of Lazarus desperately needs a rebrand for the modern age if they are to protect his child and others who can’t protect themselves.
Sometime later, Baldwin appears at the town house demanding that Marcus pick up his cell phone from time to time. The elder de Cleremont male asks if he’s aware of the recent string of murders clearly done by a vampire in Oxford. Marcus hadn’t known but asks what it has to do with the family. Baldwin doesn’t answer and instead wants the younger vampire to turn over control of the knights to him. As Philippe’s only living blood son it should be his. Marcus doesn’t cow though and retorts that Matthew entrusted him with the position. The older man says that his father has been lying to him and doesn’t deserve his loyalty. Turns out that Ysabeau sent Baldwin to ask Marcus to return to Sept Tour.
In France, grandmother and grandson have a serious conversation on his role as grandmaster. He wants to change the way things are done and is committed to make a real difference in the world. Ysabeau is encouraging and says that as the group’s leader he can decide what to do. She also reveals that Philippe created the order to preserve their species but also to protect her as a carrier of blood rage. This of course the disease that currently runs through the unknown vampire that’s currently killing humans in Oxford. She and Marcus are carriers, but it is active in Matthew. He realizes that his father did lie to him years ago when his children were all culled as it turns out not because he had been irresponsible but because some of his offspring likely exhibited the illness. Ysabeau explains that Matthew had been given orders by Philippe to wipe out the disease and had chosen to protect his son from the truth. She says now he knows what is at stake and how dangerous it is if they are linked in any way to the murders, the congregation will come for all of them.
Final Thoughts
SO MUCH RED WINE this episode! This was a nice touch as red wine was actually prominent in the books as a beverage that vampires could enjoy aside from blood.
Is it just me or demanding to know some very personal things about a person you hardly know a bit much? Ahem Sophie.
This episode was a very Marcus focused one which I loved. It’s going to be really interesting to watch him grow into his role as grandmaster of a very old and prestigious order and what he plans to do about it.
Interestingly in the books Ysabeau doesn’t reveal her connection to blood rage until the third book (The Book of Life). Curious to see what more from book three they incorporate into the show this season.
Who is the mysterious vampire on a killing spree in Oxford and what does he/she want with the portraits of Diana and Matthew? Well if you read the books you know exactly the answer to this heh.
RESIDENT ALIEN Pilot Episode 101 Pictured Alan Tudyk as Harry Vanderspeigle (Photo by James DittingerSYFY)
In Resident Alien, Alan Tudyk plays yet another Alien Starship pilot in a pilot episode that’s deviously funny
I think Alan Tudyk is inhuman. An actual living breathing alien from another planet, rather than accepting the fact, that perhaps he is just this good of an actor. There’s a subtly to his conviction. Whether it’s in I-Robot, Star Wars, Harley Quinn, or Doom Patrol, this Julliard thespian knows how to put on a stellar performance, creating such timeless and heartfelt characters that, somehow, withhold just the right amounts of humanity. Precisely stripping something at something essential. Like a living, breathing, tinman. There’s a calculated and methodological withdrawal that makes Alan Tudyk very gifted at portraying characters that are, ever so slightly, convincingly inhuman. Which tremendously in his new show, Resident Alien.
What Is Resident Alien About?
Based on the popular Dark Horse comic series by Peter Hogan, Resident Alien follows the story of a stranded space alien (Alan Tudyk) who poses as a small-town doctor in Patience, Colorado. Taking on the identity of Harry Vanderspeigle — a vacationing physician whom his characters murders and assumes his identity — this new Harry/Alien Tudyk, is tasked with helping the nearby townsfolk, as he’s the only physician standby. Having no choice but to try and maintain this false identity while secretly searching for pieces of his wrecked ship to rebuild and return home. What results is the budding of a procedural science fiction drama that’s equally silly as it is serious, as Harry holds a pretty dark secret.
I’ve been covering Resident Alien since its announcement both at NYCC 2019 as well as its most recent developments at NYCC 2020. Mostly, because we’re pretty big fans of the SYFY network here at TheWorkprint. But Personally, I’m also a big fan of Alan Tudyk. Especially in regards to his ConMan TV series, which I wholeheartedly consider, the best digitally self-produced web series ever made. Suffice to say, though I was impressed with the Resident Alien pilot debut back in 2019, I’m even more impressed with it in 2021.
From what I gathered, the pilot and the series, on the whole, have only gotten better in quality over the years. The design work of both the alien prosthetics, CGI, and spaceship, are beautifully constructed (especially, when compared to the greenscreen tennis-ball and metal awning days) and from what I gathered, the extra time spent developing the show seems to have only helped both the writers and actors find their chemistry.
There is both a direction and pacing here atypical of a series’ first season. The show seems sure of itself, and the pilot is a pretty great set-up for a procedural comedy-drama. In many ways, I think Resident Alien is sort of like the show Lucifer except, instead of a calculated and confident devil, we get a clumsy, awkward, and slightly homicidal space alien played by Alan Tudyk.
RESIDENT ALIEN Pilot Episode 101 Pictured (l-r) Judah Prehn as Max Hawthorne, Alien Harry (Photo by James DittingerSYFY)And when I say Tudyk excels at playing an alien in this series, I don’t mean his colorful reptilian child-terrifying form (seen above). No, what really sells the role is Tudyk’s portrayal of the human-in-disguise character, Harry. A physician that used to run a pathology lab at Rutgers (my alma matter which I had to mention!). Harry is a creature still becoming accustomed to being quite literally in his own skin. All in awkward attempts of desperately trying to fit in to keep his cover. As a result of his profession and reluctant situation, Harry the alien accidentally often finds himself helping other humans. A prospect which he detests shown over voice-over throughout the series, as he views our species as greatly inferior.
Many of the jokes in Resident Alien derive from Harry’s greater-than-thou perception of the human race, which works in a Mork and Mindy kind of way. And if the prospects of an awkward Alien Tudyk entices you, the pilot episode alone has moments of Harry jiving to Nicki Minaj‘s ‘Starships‘ after a couple of rounds of whisky shots with Asta and D’Arcy the hot bartender, playing silly putty with a human brain during an autopsy, and having to Google search the meaning is behind the word “douchebag” (with a follow-up image search of what a human taint is shortly after).
Atop of this, there are also brilliant moments of uncertainty as to whether or not Harry is actually good or evil. It’s a diabolical naivete style of comedy reminiscent of early-season Stewie from Family Guy. Which makes sense, given that Resident Alien is being showrun by Chris Sheridan, the longtime writer and producer of the long-running Fox series. Having talked with Chris two years ago, you can immediately tell that he was excited to be developing his own TV series, and the fruits of his labor bloom everywhere here in this pilot. It was also rather evident how great of a relationship he’d developed with his cast, letting them showcase their own talents and skill.
The Supporting Cast
RESIDENT ALIEN — Pilot Episode 101 — Pictured (l-r) Sara Tomko as Asta Twelvetrees, Alan Tudyk as Harry Vanderspeigle– (Photo by James DittingerSYFY)
Finally, I’d be remiss to neglect to mention that the supporting cast that we’ll soon get to know have been nothing shy of stellar. Sara Tomko plays the heartfelt Asta, a part-Native American woman from a troubled past that’s as equally caring as she is intimidatingly strong. Interviewing her last year was a delight, as she’s taken a seriously cultured yet sentimental approach to her role. I will wholeheartedly admit, Asta is hands-down a favorite character of mine in the series (I’ve seen the first seven episodes as of writing this).
Alice Wetterlund, who plays the wild but funloving D’arcy, is the kind of spirit I personally missing hanging out with at the bar. A zany comedic and in-your-face wild child unafraid of supporting her friends or calling it like it is, often in hilarious fashion. Though she’s not prominently featured in the pilot, she is featured heavily in the rest of the series and I do think she’ll have her own fan club the more that the show takes off.
Corey Reynolds plays ‘Big Black’ Sheriff Mike, the small town policeman whose tough attitude is often overshadowed by a strangely geeky demeanor. Reynolds — who is an actor originally from Broadway — utilizes some free reign on his character development, even showcasing some of his surprisingly talented beatboxing in the pilot episode.
Finally, there is also his deputy Liv (Elizabeth Bowen), who is sweet yet also an incredibly skilled police officer, and who often serves as a great foil to Mike’s character this season. She is also, like the best characters in these ‘everyone’s in on the joke’ sitcoms, the most sensible person throughout the series.
The Take
Overall, this pilot episode is both a rather funny and heartwarming introduction to the series. Without spoilers, I’ll also mention that the twist in the end really throws a wrench into everything, adding a funny hook that makes for great tension throughout the series. Again, I can’t stress enough, through years of development, this pilot has only gotten better over time (third iteration watching it), so definitely check out Resident Alien, if you can. I’ll be reviewing every single episode this season.
RESIDENT ALIEN -- "Pilot" Episode 101 -- Pictured: Alan Tudyk as Harry Vanderspeigle -- (Photo by: James Dittinger/SYFY)
The beloved science fiction actor and Julliard thespian breaks down his process about what it was like pretending to be an alien living in a human’s body.
He’s been a pirate, a spaceship captain, a robot (twice), a chipmunk, a reality-bending Mr. nobody, and even the crown prince of crime. Yet, it is only now, playing a crash-landed space alien — a science fiction role that Alan Tudyk’s all too familiar with — where we finally get to see him shine in a SYFY Network TV lead.
Based on the popular Dark Horse comic series co-created by Peter Hogan and Steve Parkhouse, Resident Alien sees Tudyk play Dr. Harry Vanderspiegel. A physician vacationing down in Patience, Colorado, who due to the Hippocratic Oath he knows absolutely nothing about, is forced to help the town as the area’s only remaining resident doctor.
Secretly however, Harry is an alien in disguise who knows nothing about humanity outside of Law and Order reruns and the bizarre human form he’s assimilated-in-hiding. Because Tudyk plays Harry as a human, who is secretly a space alien, who in turn is pretending to not understand what it’s like to be a human. From everything down to our mannerism, cultures, even our basic human desires, Harry’s doing his best to fit in.
In a recent conversation with The Workprint, Tudyk discusses a bit about what the role was like along with his process. Sharing the struggle about what it takes to make such an off-center character come to awkward life.
“He has everything to learn about being human,” Tudyk says about his experience playing Harry. “Physically, it’s about making this body walk with some coordination and balance. I luckily played a couple of robots in my career — Like, sonny in I-Robot — So we approached it like: How’s the robot walk? What’s the most ergonomically efficient way to walk? I think that’s what Harry is shooting for. It’s about the movement.”
Which, throughout the pilot episode, we see very clearly. As there’s definitely a curious, yet also macabre enthusiasm that Alan brings to the character. Especially in the show’s first few episodes. Though, what really stands out was Tudyk’s approach to language. As Harry speaks in an odd fashion. Often acting as if he were coming to understand the utterance of words for the first time with the sensations of his mouth being all too foreign to him.
“The speech patterns were similar in that words are almost, by themselves, Each. One. In. A. Row.” Tudyk explains, “The way that we talk, we blend everything together. We contract words and things like that. But he actually says each word out from the beginning to the end. It goes back to theatre school and how they taught us how to talk back then.”
It’s something that Tudyk’s skills have showcased throughout his career. As the actor does a fantastic job of creating people who are just slightly inhuman. And it’s something that Amblin Entertainment — you know, the guys who brought you E.T.? — and Syfy network are currently testing him out on. With Tudyk exceeding with flying colors.
Resident Alien is on Syfy Network every Wednesday at 10 pm EST. We’ve got reviews of each episode this season, along with some more interviews with the cast about the first few episodes, so definitely, check them out.
This Week’s WandaVision paints a clearer picture about what’s happening but ultimately keeps its audiences guessing. We explain everything that we can about what we think is happening, along with S.W.O.R.D. and the magic prison theory below.
Even though I said I’d be doing spoiler-free reviews last week, I don’t think it’s possible because thus far, I’m not entirely certain what I’d be spoiling. Every media outlet I’ve read covering WandaVision seems to be sharing bits of comic book history and speculation. Easter Eggs that could be pieced together, though ultimately, I don’t think anyone genuinely knows what’s actually happening. This show, much like LOST back in its heyday, seems to be more about questions rather than answers. And thus far, the only consistent thread I’ve read is that it’s obvious Wanda is trying her best to keep this alternate reality afloat. Why this is? We don’t actually know.
But to recap: last week, we had a double-episode WandaVision debut, where a dinner with Mr. and Mrs. Hart – Vision’s pretend boss and his respective wife – led to a twisted Wanda almost letting Mr. Hart be murdered STOP IT moment; followed by an episode where Vision pulled some gum out of his gears during a drunken magic show FOR THE CHILDREN. A storyline that at first seemed like filler until, by the episode’s end, it intentionally led to Wanda’s random pregnancy. Which we explore in this episode.
It is in these types of situations that perfectly portray WandaVision’s tonal conflict as the show is strangely a bit everywhere. Something both dark in a GET OUT scenario where Vision is the only one not in on the ‘joke’, and at the same time, uncharacteristically happy in seeing Wanda and Vision’s happy life as a family.
Yet, there’s an innate discomfort built within the tension of these two conflicting realities that I am uncertain is sustainable in keeping an audience’s attention week-to-week. Especially, when the sitcom elements that run the majority of the runtime on WandaVision seem to be ultimately meaningless and none of us really know what’s going on in the series…
So here are a few possible answers floating around the internet based on everything we’ve seen up to Episode 3.
For an in-depth look and take on what’s happening. We Breakdown Everything and more in Yakety Yak: A WandaVision Cast
There Are Intentional Time Skips Styled To The Evolution Of The Sitcom Over The Decades In Every Episode
Less a theory and more a fact, where WandaVision’s plot structure stands is in that of a classic sitcom. One that starts in TV’s original golden age. Filled with laugh tracks, friendly neighbors, and a weekly aesthetic dedicated to the American family.
This week’s opening titles, wardrobe, and home furnishings, for instance, all take an homage to the Brady Bunch and the 1970s. And if you deduce the first episode being set in the 1950s housewives era, and the second being placed in the 60s, then the series does seemingly seem to be skipping forward decade-to-decade. Do the math right, this will take us to the current day by the show’s penultimate episode.
The Sitcom Family Is Wanda’s Forced Dream of The Life She’s Always Wanted
In Episode 3, we get a Doctor named Nielsen (as in the Nielson ratings, which coincided with the history of the Sitcom), a rainstorm conjured out of Wanda’s water breaking, and a pesky magic-resistant stork. All randomly conjured magical moments as equally ridiculous as they are cheesy. While fun they’re also a bit too eager to embrace happy sentiments about the miracle of new life while somehow fast-forwarding past the exhaustive 9 months of carrying and then birthing a child along the way.
The series always seems to be striving for Wanda’s unrealistic and very solvable convenience. In order of the past three episodes: dinner goes off without a hitch, the magic show is a success, and the baby is born, twice. The twins are important to keep note of because Wanda and Vision had conflicting names for their sons, which conveniently is solved, once it is revealed that a miraculous second child just happens to be in there. In fact, thus far, Wanda’s pretty much-damned anything that stands in the way of what she wants albeit with one caveat she seems adamant to protect: that no one in town can know about her magic.
At first, I thought this was because they were keeping secret identities. But then, there have been moments of Vision’s showcasing his powers via phasing or running at supernatural speeds, where nobody second-guessed that something is wrong in this reality. But perhaps it’s not the idea of being superheroes that’s the problem for Wanda’s sustaining of the illusion. Perhaps it’s the reveal that magic exists that’s her concern. But why?
A popular theory amongst journalists seems to be the idea that they’re all in a prison for magic users. As quite literally everyone in town has been fingered as a potential magic wielder or sorcerer of some sorts in Marvel’s comic universe. The patrons in town all do seem eager to escape yet unable to either remember or share the truth. We see it with Herb trying to cut through a wall in this episode and we see it with their committees, events, and the solvable episodic problem of the week. Whether it be going away on vacation or simply going home to a place that doesn’t exist, no one seems to be able to break their roles.
There’s also some comic lore that supports that Wanda is likely not the only magic-user. As Dottie Jones, whose husband’s name is Phillip Jones, seems to hint that she’s possibly Arcana. Especially, as the two appear slightly similar in appearance and the fact she’s the town’s leader. Though the biggest hint implied in the series is Agnes, who is very much implied to be Agatha Harkness. The woman complaining about her husband Ralph (whom the internet thinks could possibly be Mephisto).
Agatha is sort of a big deal as she’s Wanda’s mentor/enemy in the comics and, in a major storyline from Vision and the Scarlet Witch, the person who helps Wanda’s sons Billy and Tommy come to life. Now, the birth of the twins is a big deal in this episode. Partially because they’re likely not real, and more importantly, are revealed to be in the comics: fragments of Mephisto’s soul.
Mephisto is based on the devil in Marvel and is potentially a game-changing villain. He is also a frequent Doctor Strange enemy and since they’ve confirmed Scarlet Witch in the next Doctor Strange film, what you have is a setup for the Multiverse of Madness.
S.W.O.R.D. is trying to break to Save Wanda? Or Possibly Stop What Could Be A.I.M.
This is probably my favorite of the fan theories. Thus far, we’ve seen a lot of the SWORD logo infiltrating the series. It’s in the commercial breaks, the necklace Geraldine was wearing, and more importantly: on all the military helicopters and vehicles that have been revealed.
Given that we know SWORD is waiting just outside the compound, plus the S.O.S. addressed to Wanda, it’s obvious that the group is trying to get inside but we the audience have no idea why.
There are, however, two major events that might be telling us what Wanda’s up against. The first is the many references to Hydra, Baron Von Strucker, and even old generation Stark technology featured in WandaVision’s commercial breaks. All objects and storylines that are reminiscent of the first Captain America movie.
The second and more important hint is that Beekeeper outfit seen in episode two. Only one group in Marvel has that sort of garb and they’re directly linked to HYDRA itself: A.I.M. Who are the advanced science division behind HYDRA. To go even further down the A.I.M. rabbit hole, in the comics, A.I.M. was also responsible for the creation of the cosmic cube. The same cosmic cube that’s been responsible for almost all the technology featured in the MCU.
Now, the problem with this theory is that A.I.M. was already introduced in Iron Man 3 albeit in a different role. Through it wouldn’t be hard to retcon the whole thing and make Iron Man 3’s A.I.M have a slightly larger role in the overall MCU.
It’s widely known already that Geraldine, as we touched upon last week’s podcast, is as many fans discovered: Monica Rambeau. The young daughter of Captain Marvel’s best friend Maria Rambeau.
When Geraldine/Monica recalls how Wanda lost her brother Pietro to Ultron in this episode, it breaks Wanda’s perfect little happy sitcom reality as she realizes she’s likely some sort of spy, which makes her eject her out of town. It’s also evident now that Wanda seems to be the one definitely enforcing this charade.
Fans have speculated what Monica’s introduction could actually mean for this series, especially as her S.W.O.R.D. necklace — the organization likely run by Nick Fury mind you — blew her cover. Atop of this fans of the comics know Monica Rambeau also has some serious powers as Spectrum/The Other Captain Marvel.
The Take
Three episodes in and we know WandaVision is a campy but ultimately pointless sitcom with a dark truth that the series pivots around. It’s hard to make any sort of objective deductions about the series beyond that, though I do really enjoy the very contrasting tone.
While funny in a twisted sort of way, I do think the show needs to get somewhere soon because some critics — and more importantly casual Marvel fans — are already growing tired and just want to know what’s going on and what’s at stake here?
This week’s episode of A Discovery of Witches is an eventful one as Diana begins weaver training, the duo get summoned by two powerful individuals, and most importantly they get a lead on Ashmole 782.
Here are the notable moments from season 2 episode 3. SPOILERS AHEAD!!
The Present
Murders in England
Domenico (Greg Chillin) is called by a police officer to look at the body of a man ravaged quite viciously around his neck. The vampire says it was the right thing to do and wants a report of the post-mortem. He then heads to Venice to tell Gerbert (Trevor Eve) that he is here to negotiate, having a discovered a body that will help destroy the de Cleremonts once and for all. In exchange though Domenico wants Venice back as it is his home city. Gerbert is intrigued as the other vampire hints in the rumored tainted blood of the de Cleremonts. Very interesting.
Emily Practices High Magic
At Sept Tour, while Sarah (Alex Kingston) is asleep Em (Valarie Pettiford) is seen casting a summoning spell. We discover that she’s calling upon Rebecca Bishop’s (Sophia Myles) ghost in order to help Diana.
The Past
The Book of Life in Bohemia?
Diana (Teresa Palmer) learns from Mary Sidney (Amanda Hale) that John Dee (Struan Rodger), the queen’s alchemist, is back from the continent and has a vast library that may be of use in her search for Ashmole 782. The couple visits Dee and there they discover that the elder man had a book stolen from him by his former associate Edward Kelley while the two were in Bohemia (now in modern-day Czech Republic). Apparently, Kelley believed that the book contained the secret to immortality and was exploring it on behalf of Emperor Rudolph. Matthew (Matthew Goode) offers to retrieve the tome that is his return the one that was put in it’s place. Dee agrees to this arrangement.
Things get more complicated though when William Cecil (Adrian Rawlins) discovers that Matthew has married a witch. He appears at the inn and tells the duo that the queen is highly displeased that her shadow has hidden this from her. They are to appear before her majesty at Whitehall tomorrow. Cecil tells Matthew that his recent attitude change towards witches finally makes sense upon meeting Diana.
Matthew is super pissed and believes Kit (Tom Hughes) is the one who revealed his relationship to Diana to Cecil. The vampire tells the daemon that they are no longer friends and that he should stay the hell away from the both of them. However, Kit goes to Lord Burghley demanding to know how the other man found out about the witch because he never betrayed Matthew. Cecil refuses to answer and says he has no interest in their squabble. We do discover that Kit was though was being paid by the human and that the daemon should have been the one to report the information to him.
Meeting Queen Elizabeth
Mary comes to Diana’s aid once more and lends her an outfit suitable for being presented at court. The historian is super nervous at meeting Queen Elizabeth I (Barbara Marten), though Matthew tells her that her majesty will do all the question asking and they should provide short succinct answers as much as possible.
When they are finally in the queen’s presence, the monarch instructs Cecil and others to leave in order to talk to Matthew and Diana alone. She is highly displeased that he is married because men have trouble even listening to one woman let alone two. Diana is quick to say that her kind is loyal to the crown and that she pledges her allegiance to the other woman and implores her husband to only listen to the queen. The royal remarks that the witch is clever, but perhaps too clever. She then asks what they want with her alchemist and Matthew responds that they are looking for a book that’s only of interest to creatures. The monarch says that she’s heard Edward Kelley has discovered how to make the philosopher’s stone through this book and she’s not keen on having it be in Habsburg hands. The vampire then suggests that to get into her majesty’s good graces once more he will procure Kelly for her so that she can lock him up in the Tower until he produces the philosopher’s stone for her. Diana comments that the other woman seeks immortality and Queen Elizabeth confirms that she wants it for the sake of her country.
Weaver Training
Diana begins her training with Goody Alsop (Sheila Hancock) and three other elemental witches. They form a circle around her and Goody explains how with her third eye she is able to see magical threads all around. Each witch in the room with her has an affinity to air, water, earth, and fire. Diana is to pick an elemental thread which calls to her the most. The historian is able to see the threads but is not able to pick one. She is frustrated in the aftermath, but Goody says that normally a weaver can only see the threads of the element that is in her blood. However, Diana can see all of them so that is especially unique.
At a later date they try again with Diana only picking up one thread at a time. This training session proves to be more successful as she is easily able to grab two threads, air and water. Eventually she is able to tie the earth thread to the existing two to make a third knot and this creates a sudden explosion of magic. A massive rowan tree is projected upwards from Diana’s arms and the other witches are amazed by this with Goody explaining that this is a union of opposites and that she is truly a weaver. The historian is eager to learn more but the elder witch says she must have patience.
As Diana leaves, Susannah (Aisling Loftus) approaches her and the two have a short chat. The other witch still seems to have reservations about the newly discovered weaver but admits that she is very powerful. Susannah points out that her magic is affected by everything in her life and seems to infer that perhaps Diana is not able to control it because of her relationship to Matthew.
Matthew and Diana are Summoned to Sept Tour
Matthew recites the Lord’s Prayer and then heads to Father Hubbard to ask for forgiveness after killing Tom Caldwell. He says that should the other vampire let this matter to rest he will inform his father of Hubbard’s generosity. The priest muses that approval from Philippe de Cleremont (James Purefoy) is hard to come by and will consider Matthew’s request.
Later on, Gallowglass (Steven Cree), Matthew’s nephew, arrives in London and brings a letter from Philippe. Along with Diana, the geneticist is being summoned home to France because Hubbard had previously written to the head of the de Cleremont family. Gallowglass is one of my favorite characters and it is so incredibly satisfying to see him in the flesh!! The younger vampire will only travel with them part of the way because his father was killed by the French and he won’t step foot into the country. His father was Hugh de Cleremont, one of Philippe’s sons. Diana had previously been trying to convince Matthew that she needs to come with him to search for the Book of Life in Bohemia with him despite her weaver training only starting. Now it seems that they don’t have a choice, they must go to France first before traveling further into the continent.
Diana had told Goody Alsop that she feels in her gut that she must go on the journey to the continent to search for the book because her magic is tied to it. The elder woman is hesitant because she thinks Diana needs to continue her training and that this is a new path that the historian is on, one that she cannot see what lies ahead. Diana promises to practice what she has learned and that she would be back to continue her lessons.
This also means that the couple must leave behind Jack (Joshua Blue Pickering) in London as it would be too dangerous for him to accompany them. Diana has two miniatures painted of her and Matthew for their son and promises that they will return.
Final Thoughts
A user on Twitter pointed out the attention to detail regards to Queen Elizabeth’s smallpox scars and that is incredibly spot on.
Gallowglass, be still my heart!! Steven Cree is perfect and I cannot wait to see his and Diana’s relationship develop on the show. Also for him to call her auntie! We just need more Gallowglass in every episode please.
Matthew’s growing acceptance of being a father to Jack is so heartwarming. Especially the scene where he comforts the child after having a nightmare. No one really sees his softer side except Diana and to open himself up to Jack is great character development.
The murders during the present are an important subplot in the novels and I’m glad it didn’t get cut out.
You can stream a new episode A Discovery of Witches on AMC+, Shudder, and Sundance Now every Saturday.
This week on A Discovery of Witches, Matthew is forced to make a hard decision when it comes to another creature’s life in order to protect Diana. Diana in the meantime discovers what she is exactly and finds a teacher in Goody Alsop.
Here are the notable moments from episode 2 of this season. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
The Present
Em and Sarah are in Sept Tour
While Diana and Matthew are in the past, the witches family has taken refuge at Sept Tour under the protection of the de Cleremont family. But it’s not easy as creatures have been instructed for many years not to mingle by the Congregation. Sarah is convinced Peter Knox will find them no matter what but Em tries to reassure her that the Madison coven will not reveal their location. She also believed that the page from the Ashmole 782 Diana left them is connected somehow and must have answers for them. The redhead though is more frustrated that the Book of Life is what started this whole mess to begin with. Em asks her pointedly doesn’t she want to know why.
Downstairs, Marthe is setting up the table with Ysabeau asking if the witches will be dining with them tonight. The matriarch of the de Cleremonts clearly has no desire to play happy family with Em and Sarah but the other vampire says counters that Matthew would want his mother to make the other two women feel at home and if he can evolve then so can they.
Satu Visits Finland
Satu returns home to a report part of Finland where we are introduced to another witch who trained her. She’s upset and confronts her teacher that she wasn’t told who she was and that she doesn’t want protection but to learn and to better understand her abilities. The elder woman says she should stay then and become who she was meant to be. Satu seems to be able to then freeze an entire lake (though we don’t see her actually doing it).
The Past
Meeting Mary Sidney
At the inn with Walter and Henry, Matthew suggests they enlist the help of Mary Sidney (or Mary Herbert), Countess of Pembroke, in finding a teacher for Diana. Speaking of the historian, she geeks out in finally meeting one of her heroes. While Mary proves to be forward thinking as an alchemist, she says that she sadly cannot help them. She learned about the existence of creatures from her brother (who Matthew also knew) but she was quite reluctant in being vocal about it. Mary does ask Diana would like to assist her in her experiments and offered her friendship. The Yale professor is visibly disheartened that the other woman seems quite reluctant to aid in her quest to find a teacher, yet she does glad accept the alchemist as a friend.
During this encounter we also learn of another one of Diana’s unique abilities as she was able to bring a snake pattern on Mary’s slipper to life. She pretended that the reptile must have crawled in from the outside, but everyone knew witchcraft was involved. Before they departed, the countess offered a word of advice that no one in London should be trusted with knowledge of Diana. The events in Scotland were making people very fearful.
Things Get Political For Matthew
Now that he’s back in London, Cecil expects Matthew to continue serving the crown and his task this week is to discover if there is a plot amongst the English witches as a response to the witch hunts in Scotland. The lord feels that the imprisonment and torture of the leader of the Scottish witches would cause their counterparts in England to rebel against the queen. Matthew counters that they helped repel the armada, but Cecil says no one is above suspicion.
Lord Burghley then has him question a local witch named Thomas “Tom” Caldwell to find out what the witches are plotting. All because poor Tom said negative things about the crown while he was being tortured. Matthew argues that their covenant forbids them from meddling in human affairs but Cecil points out that if that was the case why was the vampire here working for them then? The spy is expected to extra a confession by any means necessary.
The situation gets even more complicated when we are introduced to Father Andrew Hubbard, the defacto head of all the creatures of London. He was made by a vampire at some point in time before his death, but his sire is unknown. Father Hubbard arranged a truce with Philippe de Cleremont that essentially had them stay out of the other’s business. Matthew is summoned to meet him that evening with Diana. Back at the inn he has word sent to Kit who arrives soon after. The witch learns that Father Hubbard takes in the lost creatures of the town but controls them too. Matthew tells his lady love that she shouldn’t under any circumstances let the other vampire taste her blood because it’s a part of the man’s ritual to reveal another person’s soul. In a sense it does because vamps are able to glean another creature’s secrets through it. Diana though falls outside of the de Cleremont diplomatic immunity in this case and Kit advices that Matthew inhabit his old life quickly before he gets himself killed. Downer much?
Later at Father Hubbard’s home, audiences witness a new member joining the vampire’s family. Just like Matthew said, the priest drew blood from his new “child” and then was accepted a member of their group. Hubbard notices them and quickly moves close to Diana prompting Matthew to threaten the entire den if the other vamp doesn’t step away. He does but notices the bite marks on the witch’s neck and tells the duo that the de Cleremont male flaunts the rule by allowing Diana to roam free. In addition, relationships between creatures is a sin and the fact that he’s even fed on her is worse. If it was without consent, he would be put to death and if
she gave it willingly she would be cast out of England. Diana though comes up with a solution without having to actually join Father Hubbard’s flock by revealing that she did feed Matthew of her own free will because he was dying. She forced him to drink to save his life. While he accepts this explanation, he warns her that nothing happens in London without his blessing.
The next day Kit finds Matthew at a church praying where the daemon tells his friend that they should go have some fun. The two men end up at a tavern where they win at cards against two poor men. They even take a small hoop earring from one of them. As the two creatures depart the establishment one of Cecil’s men is waiting for Matthew in the street to remind the spy of his responsibilities. He needs to hurry up and question Tom at the Tower. The clerk tells the vampire not to test his lord’s patience with Matthew getting up in the man’s personal space as a reminder that he is a dangerous creature.
In the aftermath, Kit and Matthew have another drink and the daemon asks about his future. The geneticist won’t answer that of course because that way lies madness and that no man should know their fate. Giving up, the other man asks instead if Matthew still writes verse and is told that the elder’s focus is on science and the alchemical process as it’s evolved. In their conversation Kit asks what questions he’s trying to answer now and the vampire remarks that it’s still the same ones such as why is he here? Matthew is doubtful that he’ll ever learn the answer to that. As he leaves, Kit advises him not to ignore Cecil’s orders no matter how he feels about witches now.
Back at the inn, Matthew is reading Thomas Caldwell’s testimonies as Diana asks him about it understanding that the Malleus Maleficarum was used on the imprisoned man. She points out that this book was a tool to trap innocent people and she asks why Cecil would need a creature interrogated if he knows they exist. Matthew explains that it is the queen that is worried that England’s witches will turn against her and unfortunately under duress Thomas said some very terrible things about the crown. Diana realizes that the poor man has committed treason which would result in the death sentence and the vampire gives a yup. He knows what she’s thinking though and argues that he wouldn’t have brought her here if witch hunts were going to break out. It’s another twenty years before that is apparently supposed to start. Matthew then asks if he could please finish his reading and Diana relents letting him know that she’s found a teacher before leaving.
As he heads to the Tower sometime later, Hubbard finds him and essentially requests that he help Tom Caldwell who is one of his. The priest says that the prisoner is innocent and as the queen’s trusted shadow can exert influence. Matthew is cutting and tells the other man that any influence he has won’t be to further Hubbard’s interest. But the top London vampire follows up that they both have individuals to protect, respectively Diana and Tom. Hubbard then low key threatens that maybe he should seek Philippe’s assistance instead.
In Caldwell’s cell within the Tower, Matthew decides to snap his neck, thinking that this is the best option. Both Cecil and Hubbard though are not pleased with the outcome. The human thinks that perhaps the vampire has a reason to side with the witch though Matthew stresses he is loyal to the crown. Meanwhile the priest has a letter sent to Philippe to inform him likely of Diana and her relationship to his son. The historian is the only one who seems to understand that Matthew killed Caldwell out of mercy.
Diana Finds Her Teacher at Last
While out with Francoise, Diana sees Susannah Norman on the street again and is able to get the other witch to talk to her back at the inn since Matthew is out. Inside, Susannah asks the historian to transfer the content of an egg into the bowl without her hands. Diana asks if they can do a different one because she doesn’t know that spell, but the other woman says that she can’t manage this then no witch can help her. Diana concentrates and her magic grows the embryo into a baby chick much to the astonishment of Susannah who says that she’ll speak to her coven head, Goody Alsop. Goody also happens to be the most powerful witch in England.
Sometime after, Diana is accompanied by Matthew to meet the elder witch. Goody asks to take a look at her with the historian hesitant, revealing how Satu tried to look inside her before. But it takes only a few painless moments and England’s strongest witch says that she’s waited a long time for Diana. The auguries foretold her arrival a long time ago and with the trouble up north Goody knew to expect her now.
The elder woman says that Agnes Sampson is imprisoned and the three of them are all that is left of their kind. Diana finally learns that she is a unique kind of witch, a weaver, a maker of spells. The historian is skeptical though because she’s always been terrible at spell work but Goody interjects that she needs to create her own. Matthew mansplains a little he knows of old stories where witches have very unique abilities but he’s never encountered a weaver before. Exasperated the elder witch says that they are rare, often hunted down, and forced into hiding. Diana ponders if Satu knew what she was but doesn’t know for certain. Goody then drops another bombshell that Stephen Proctor was one as well because she could see the binding spell he crafted onto his daughter. He knew that Diana would follow his path and so spellbound her to protect her with love.
Susannah is still super cautious about Diana being trained because it would attract too much attention and points out that the Council of Witches need to be consulted. Matthew though would rather not because he doesn’t want his ladylove’s identity being discovered. Good agrees though that the group’s consent is required and Diana’s presence has already been felt.
The following day, Diana pleads her case before the council revealing how she was spellbound and orphaned as a child. Now that her bindings are gone she’s ready to learn the full nature of her power and she needs community of witches to do that. Susannah is then asked to state her concern and the other woman says that Diana’s marriage to a vampire would bring danger to their people. Just as the council seems to not want to agree to the training, Goody interjects that Diana’s soul is as clear to her as her own. Dark times were coming and Mistress Royden is their prophesized witch who will come to their aid. As the group still seem hesitant, the historian reveals that she is a time spinner and she was come from the future to seek a very special teacher. She’s also seen the Book of Life with her own eyes. Diana admits that she doesn’t know how her magic is connected to the first grimoire but it and her relationship to Matthew are all woven together. One cannot exclude each other. Led by Goody, the council comes to accept and welcome her, forming a circle with their hands extended in magical greeting.
Final Thoughts
This was an exciting episode to see even more characters from the book on screen! One of the things I loved most about the books is the wonderful way author Deborah Harkness weaves real historical figures into her story. Shadow of Night (book two in the All Souls trilogy that this season is based on) almost felt like it fit into the alternate history genre with witches, vampires, and daemons. This is 100% my jam.
The trip back to the past isn’t going to be without it’s complications as Matthew and Diana are being to discover and they have to be careful to not make changes that will impact their present. It was definitely wise that Matthew chose not to reveal what happens to Kit despite his friend’s questions.
This episode also felt meaty in presenting different interests at play between Cecil, Hubbard, Matthew, and Diana. The show doesn’t shy away from also addressing serious issues like prejudice and poverty. The witch hunts in particular show how so many innocent people were tortured and killed because of fear. It was also interesting to see how Diana’s morals to fight against injustice still influences her actions in the past, while Matthew’s chief concern is her safety and well being. It seems that he doesn’t necessarily want to rock the boat, just get what they need and get out of there.
Now that Hubbard has written to Philippe I hope that we’ll finally get to meet him in the next episode. He is a unique character and I can’t wait to see how James Purefoy brings him to life.
You can watch A Discovery of Witches on AMC, Shudder, and Sundance Now.
An homage to sitcoms like Bewitched and I Dream of Jeannie, WandaVision is a fragmented reality of its two titular heroes, stuck in their own type of Pleasantville.
I have been waiting for this moment in the superhero genre for a very long time. The period where we see big superhero franchises transition slightly away from the superhero beat-em-ups and get downright crazy and even metaphysical. Because in a world where superpowers and superbeings exist, I don’t think every conflict needs a battle. Not everything should be a big lead up towards an Avengers: Endgame. You can make superhero stories without them.
In fact, both the Sandman and Silver Surfer, two of my favorite comics about superheroic and otherworldly beings, were fantastic stories that in lieu of fistfighting, had conflicts of family, philosophy, and what it means to truly be human. I think Swamp Thing tells a similar promising tale about humanity, and I also believe Martian Manhunter, and in this series: Vision (with Wanda), also tells stories about people just one-degree separated. People that just want to be normal, fit-in, fall in love and be understood… hopefully in their own happily-ever-after.
For a Spoiler-filled discussion, you can listen to our Yakety Yak: A WandaVision Podcast over at TheWorkprint podcast. Available here, Apple and Google Podcasts and Spotify.
WANDAVISION
WandaVision starts as a direct tribute to the 1950s era of sitcom comedy. The jokes are oddly situational and sympathetic, and the tensions derive from the need of Wanda to not deviate from the sitcom reality. The plot thus far of the series’ first two episodes, seems to come from seeing the two as a couple attempting to blend in. Wanda, as a supportive housewife who can do-it-all quite literally with the snap of a finger, and Vision as the loving husband who has a job — that quite frankly, doesn’t make any sense — and their suburban lives in the golden age of the sitcom family. And while most of the fun is in seeing this duo do what they can to fit-in there’s this dark thread I absolutely love about the series that cuts through the happy-go-lucky tone like a hot butter knife. It’s a truth we acknowledge that the characters incessantly ignore that’s consistently slapping the audience in the face:
That there is something very wrong with this picture
I applaud writers Jac Schaeffer and Gretchen Enders, as the show is funny in sort of a cheesy antiquated way that would make my grandma laugh. A perfect encapsulation of that era and brand of comedy. But what it’s the secret that really drives this series. The confusing moments of reality breaking tension, and the need for our characters to force a smile and convince ourselves of the happy ending.
Behind the scenes, as we know from Endgame, Wanda and Vision’s stories are honestly very tragic. Which is why I’m excited as this show completely reverse engineers the formula. Vision is dead. This is, in a twisted way, our lens into their world as a loving couple that we’ve been told yet never seen, and their happy beginnings. In the first two episodes, we establish that this pocket reality of sorts is fragmenting. Color is changing. And more than anything else, someone nefarious lurks from behind the scenes to ruin the picture.
But none of that matters because the show reminds us it’s a funny sitcom! I find it poetic that Elizabeth Olson does such a stellar job fitting the role, given her sisters’ history of being sitcom darlings via Full House. Though much due credit in Paul Bettany, who finally sees some spotlight after being a part of the Marvel Cinematic Franchise since it’s inception (I think we sort of forget that he was the original Jarvis alongside Ironman sometimes).
The tone of the first two episodes is concise. The first one being a confusing introduction to this reality, and the second is a funny take on a PG13 version of a drunken magic show. But that’s all I will share due to spoilers. More than anything this show is about love as we get to see more of Vision and Wanda as a couple, which makes me giddy as I’ve always loved their relationship.
New Era
In WandaVision we see the beginnings of the Marvel Cinematic Television era. The first show among many, that the Marvel brand is planning to release to coincide with their cinematic movies. Weirdly enough, this next phase will operate a lot like professional wrestling. Regular TV content in the Disney+ MCU that is then supplemented with your movie-going MC theatre event.
Atop of this, what you’re seeing is no longer vigilantes but rather, superheroes that can bend reality in itself. A direction which the MCU started steering towards with Doctor Strange — which uncoincidentally, will be tying into Wanda Maximoff’s story — and one that opens up a lot of Marvel storytelling possibility. With WandaVision, The Eternals, and later, Doctor Strange and The Multiverse of Madness, these are not your traditional superhero stories. Because like all good narratives, things have to change over time. And now that we’ve entered Phase 4 and the era of Disney+, we’re starting to see more unique takes, with more representation and more female-driven leads.
Final Thoughts
So, what happens when a reality-bending 5-Star level superhero that makes Jean Grey quiver in her boots and the world’s first Ubermensch supercomputer lives in a Pleasantville type of Utopia? The answer to that is exactly what you should expect in WandaVision. Tune in every week for a spoiler-filled podcast breaking it down, and a spoiler-free review here.
MR. MAYOR -- Season: 1 -- Pictured: (l-r) Vella Lovell as Mikaela Shaw, Mike Cabellon as Tommy Tomás, Holly Hunter as Arpi Meskimen, Ted Danson as Neil Bremer, Bobby Moynihan as Jayden Kwapis, Kyla Kenedy as Orly Bremer — (Photo by: Robert Trachtenberg/Chris Haston/NBC)
Two great shows ended recently, but their loss is our gain because the creators of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (Tina Fey and Robert Carlock) are bringing us Mr. Mayor. And, headlining is none other than Ted Danson, free from his stint on The Good Place. Actually, now that I think about it there are at least two more orphans in this cast: Vella Lovell from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, and Kyla Kenedy from Speechless. Honestly, I loved all of those shows, which is why I’m extremely willing to see how this one goes.
The pilot for Mr. Mayor sets things up nicely. Our titular character (Danson as Neil Bremer) is your standard older white male who gets himself in over his head trying to impress a much younger woman. The twist? The woman is a girl, and his daughter (say hi to Orly Bremer), and it’s not some creepy southern gothic thing either – this is mined for a cute joke that made the rounds in the previews. Though, I do find the flashback explanation to why he became Mayor a little hard to believe – is it really true that millennials don’t understand the concept of retirement? On the other hand, is Orly considered a millennial? Generation titles always confuse me. At any rate, to overhear your daughter on the phone with a friend calling you “lazy” for not doing anything would probably result in you smacking the phone out of your child’s hand and giving them a good talking to (back in my day at least!). Instead, Neil opts to run for Mayor.
The Donald Trump of the whole thing is that he winds up winning to the surprise of everyone. Luckily, that’s where the comparison ends. Neil is a successful businessman who clearly cares about his family and his job. This is shown in the second episode when he complains about having to do all the meaningless press appearances rather than affecting genuine change. It’s a nice departure from what our current public figures have shown us in the last…oh…what? 30 years? If not longer.
Helping Bremer out is Mikaela Shaw (hi Vella), his chief of staff, Tommy Tomás (played by Mike Cabellon), and Jayden Kwapis (the hilarious Bobby Moynihan, who had a brief show of his own in Me, Myself, and I). Considering the creators it’s impossible not to compare this to 30 Rock with Niel being Alec Baldwin’s Jack Donaghy, albeit more sincere in many ways (a kind of Jack/Kenneth hybrid). Jayden feels akin to Tracy Jordan what with his propensity for saying outlandish things at any moment while being much more helpful than Mr. Jordan ever was (another potential Kenneth hybrid). My guess is Tomás would be Pete Hornberger, burdened with purpose but not exactly dedicated. Then there’s Mikaela, I’ll be honest, I’m not sure where to categorize her…is she a Liz Lemon? Will she and the Mayor form an unshakeable bond that only hardened professionals develop while deep in the thick of public service? Probably. The other wildcard in the bunch is another big star – Holly Hunter – playing Arpi Meskimen, who, funnily enough, is an ambitious local politician railing against the Mayor simply because she couldn’t get enough votes to run herself. This makes me correlate her with Jenna Maroney, not because she’s vapid or Chihuahua-level high-strung (she’s definitely not), but because she’s fierce in her need to be seen and heard and given her due.
The second episode, “Mayor’s Day Out” has some classic sitcom hijinks for the A-plot, while the B-plot gives us a good idea of how government really works. The thing I really enjoy about watching Fey’s shows is that her jokes are extremely effective in highlighting nearly obscene levels of absurdity that are allowed to happen just because the status quo favors some arbitrary hierarchy between two parties (could be class, gender, race). It’s why I loved 30 Rock and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, but I do urge audiences to be patient!
It’s been a while (over 14 years) since 30 Rock premiered, but here’s a fun fact: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip also premiered at the same, and critics were sure that Studio 60 would survive while Rock would shrivel up and die after a middling first season. Well, unsurprisingly, the critics were profoundly wrong – Studio 60 lasted only 1 season, 30 Rock? Oh, that went on for another 6! So if you’re not feeling Mr. Mayor after the first two episodes, give it some time. Parks and Rec had a famously dull first season. This show has a good cast, and good creators, I believe it has longevity potential. And besides, these two opening episodes feel pretty solid to me. Sure, they may occasionally dig up old sitcom gems, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t funny.
In the season two premiere of A Discovery of Witches, we pick up right where we left off with Diana and Matthew arriving in the past, London 1590 to be precise.
We soon meet the vampire’s friends in the School of Night who are tasked with helping the couple find a tutor for the witch and Ashmole 782. This point in the series is based on the second novel of the All Souls trilogy, Shadow of Night.
While the two don’t land exactly where they originally intended too, it’s close enough and Matthew quickly directs them to a nearby building where Diana (Teresa Palmer) is soon confronted by Christopher “Kit” Marlowe (Tom Hughes) for being a witch and a trespasser. Matthew (Matthew Goode) quickly returns after going to look for other occupants and tells the daemon that she is with him, she is his wife so the other man must respect her. Kit thinks that his friend has been bewitched because at this point in time the vampire still detested witches. Marlowe by the way is a daemon.
Sir Walter Raleigh (Michael Lindall) and Henry Percy (Adam Sklar), the 9th Earl of Northumberland are called by Kit to join them and are also introduced to Diana (who is forced to wear Louisa’s old clothes). Matthew explains to the gentlemen that he is requesting for their help to find his lady a teacher and to locate the manuscript. Kit is familiar with it, explaining to the two humans that it contains possibly contains origins to creatures though he is doubtful it exists. Diana strongly interjects that it does. Earlier she also realizes that her Matthew is Matthew Roydon who was the least known individual in the group of poets, writers, and scientists from the School of Night. As a historian, she is thrilled to have discovered this, while the vampire seems more apprehensive as he now must become this version of himself again. The group also recommends that Diana stay indoors to not attract attention with her strange accent and choice of words. She acquiesces but is clearly not pleased about it.
Matthew leaves to make inquiries while Diana wakes up from her sleep being drawn to another witch in the street. Though the other woman seems to recognize something in her, she runs away leaving Diana. Back at the inn, Matthew returns and she tells him that the witch she ran after was likely Sophie Norman’s ancestor. Diana believes this makes complete sense because of the chess piece the daemon had given them in season one. This must be how the Norman family gains the piece in the past and she is convinced that this woman must become her teacher. Meanwhile Matthew is quite apprehensive that it could have been nefarious spell work luring his lady love outside, but she says she has a new way of perceiving and knowing magic. In this scene we also see the vampire’s highly protective nature where he’s upset that Diana went out by herself while she counters that he won’t even reveal to her where exactly he went tonight. It goes both ways that they protect each other. The historian doesn’t back down and tells him that he either finds her an instructor or she will go out there and find one herself.
The following morning he asks her to show him the building that the witch had emerged from and he’ll get Walter on the case to find her. He then adds that he might take her around the city as long as Francoise has her new wardrobe ready. Thankfully new clothes are ready for her and our very modern professor is decked out in Elizabethan era attire ready to check out her new reality. As the couple walk along cobblestone streets Matthew spots someone who recognizes him and he curses. We then see this individual report back to William Cecil (first Baron Burghley) that Matthew is in town. Back at the inn, the vampire is annoyed with himself for being careless and now has to pay Cecil a visit though he won’t tell Diana who this associate of Kit’s is. He’ll just have to go through this formality and pay his respects though it’ll be challenging since this man will has for a report and he has no idea what his old self was doing the week prior. Matthew has an idea though and goes to see William Pole at a tavern and is able to get information that he had been sent to Scotland to deal with a Scottish king who was rounding up witches to focus the monarch on his own affairs. With sufficient knowledge, the vampire heads to visit Cecil.
Lord Burghley commands Matthew to explain himself and the geneticist explains that he left because his errand concluded though Cecil retorts that the assignment was not meant to be a short one. The vampire goes on to say that he’s sown the seeds of chaos and staying any longer would risk detection, unless that’s what the other man wanted of course. The English lord backs down for the moment and Matthew takes his leave. But before stepping out of the room, Cecil tells him not to leave town without permission because now that he’s back he’s going to be put to work.
Back at the inn, Diana discovers a secret room in the attic and realizes that Matthew had been a spy during this time period. Francoise finds her and confirms that the other vampire is identifying other Catholics and betraying them. When he returns, he finds her sitting behind his desk. She asks him how everything went and he answers that the other man remains convinced for the moment. Diana then wants to find out why he did it and Matthew tiredly responds that it’s his duty. Philippe de Clermont (James Purefoy) needed a spy in the English court and he fulfilled that role well. The witch is still flabbergasted that his father would send him there knowing that he is Catholic. He asks her to come to bed, adding that she’s the only thing that makes sense to him right now.
The following day, Kit, Walter and Henry manage to locate Diana’s witch from earlier. The other woman clearly doesn’t want to be there and even at first claims that the historian isn’t a witch. Matthew is quite threatening that the other woman needs to consider her answer as Diana asks to be tested a different way because no one would want him for an enemy. The witch (Susannah Norman) relents and asks Diana to ignite a candle flame and stop a bell from ringing. She is unable to do it but asks for one more try and as she concentrates a bowl of fruit on the table withers and decomposes, frightening Susannah. Diana goes after her and says that she truly needs help. The other woman claims that it is witches like her that is the reason why they are being hunted in Scotland and why they are being harassed by men like her husband in even in England.
Diana follows her out to the street with Matthew coming out soon after. While the other witch is gone, they do run into Jack Blackfriars, a young pickpocket. She gives him some food and is able to discover from the boy that rumors of her being a witch has gone around and it originated from the Lamb, a local tavern around the corner. Later on that evening as Diana is having dinner with the members of the School of Night, Walter and Henry comment on how Matt has made a lot of changes to his appearance since they saw him last. The vampire asks Walter if he’s had a drink at the Lamb recently and the other man says that he hasn’t but it’s Kit who’s always there. At this point we know that it’s the poet who spread the rumor that Diana is a witch. The other two men depart leaving Marlowe alone with two time travelers. This time however the historian feels that they should tell the daemon the truth because he won’t stop being suspicious. Matthew is reluctant but tells Kit that this is his last chance with him. Diana goes on to explain that she’s from Cambridge, Massachusetts a colony in the new world from a different time. The daemon thinks she is crazy to believe that she is a time spinner but the vampire confirms it because he traveled back with her. Kit asks where is the Matthew from this period and she says they don’t know. It’s possible that he got displaced when they arrived from the future and that when they leave things should return to what they were. Losing patience, the vampire asks the daemon to accept them if the other man was ever his friend and should he breathe a word of this to anyone he will end him.
Cecil then sends word to Matthew and he takes a small boat in the dead of night to a prison where it looks like Pole is being kept after a severe beating. He then instructs a guard to pull out the prisoner’s tongue. Yikes.
Back at the house, Kit and Diana sit together for a fireside chat with some wine. This is the first time that the daemon isn’t openly hostile to the witch and she realizes how the man is actually deeply in love with Matthew. Kit tells her that this version of his friend seems gentler, but he won’t remain the same now that he has to wear the cloak of his old self. He’s seen the vampire at his worst and feels that Diana is out of her depth. She counters that he doesn’t know her but he goes on to talk about how when they first met Matthew singles her out making her believe that she was special an exceptional in a way that he could not define. Kit goes on that there is a darkness in the other man that was there through the many lifetimes he’s lived but it was all just marking time till he met you. Well, that sounds awfully familiar. When she says nothing he tells her that if she must stay then fine but don’t think for one second that she actually knows him. Claws out!
Final Thoughts
Kit’s final words to Diana in this episode really rang true where her Matthew won’t be quite the same either being back in this time. The gentle professor has left the building and the spymaster has been forced to surface. The vampire is clearly on edge not being able to fully control his environment and having to be very worried about keeping Diana safe. He seems to oscillate between deception, aggravation, and threats in his interactions with the characters of 1590.
It is so much fun though to see characters from Shadow of Night come to life and I was particularly happy to see Jack as he’ll be important as the story continues. I do hope we get to see Annie soon enough as well!
Overall, it’s a great start to season two and looking forward to continued story development as Matthew and Diana hunt for Ashmole 782 and their search for a teacher. The tone definitely feels darker and more sinister as our main characters face dangers from different fronts. They are strangers in a strange land and there’s lots of fear of the supernatural.
I continue to enjoy the interactions between the different characters especially with Kit disliking Diana so much. Their scene at the end of the episode was riveting because it made her pause for a moment realizing that Kit’s relation to the vampire was also significant. How much does she really know about Matthew? Will their relationship survive this trip back to the past? Time will tell!
You can watch A Discovery of Witches on AMC, Shudder, and Sundance Now.
After a 36 year long career, Trebek’s final words are but a simple farewell.
It was one of those big box TVs — a wooden Sony Trinitron, with the solid oak finish, and the dusty undercarriage that grandma never bothered sweeping with her walis — that we’d been watching on. The year was 1991. On the tube, in white, are the opening titles for Jeopardy. Where an older man with a friendly mustache, not unlike my own father’s, stood in front of a camera and quizzed contestants about different pieces of trivia asking them to answer in the form of a question. My parents, like the parents of most millennials now in their 30’s, had just arrived home after a two-hour commute to the city. Dinner was finished. Everyone was exhausted. And together, if but only for 30 minutes until bathtime and then bedtime, we are a family. Gathered to watch Trebeck ask questions to strangers on TV…
I didn’t understand what was going on at the time. I was three. But I did know that my family really liked this show. My parents thought that by watching it, my older sister and I would somehow become smarter. When I was older I realized I was not the only one to experience this. I’d actually learned about several families who had similar experiences. In school, teachers began quizzing us in the game show’s point-based format; with quiz-based games on biology, history, or really anything educational that they deemed test-worthy. A semi-lame way to make education fun thanks to that dusty old man with the glasses on TV and his enthusiasm for trivia.
Trebek wasn’t as kind as a Mr. Rodgers. Nor was he as charismatic as a Bob Barker. Nevertheless, he was something consistent throughout my entire 32 years of living. A person who’d I’d accidentally learn from via his show over the years and sort of grown-up watching unintentionally into my adulthood. Because Jeopardy was on when we were uncertain about our future post 9/11 and the subsequent wars that followed. It was there during the internet boom of the 2000s. It was there to feature some of the first in state of the art artificial intelligence — IBM Watson — and of course, had their tournaments of champions. Ken Jennings and James Holzhauer.
Jeopardy was a show I found myself suddenly getting better at through the years. I was able to self-measure myself getting semi-smarter over time, the more questions I could answer as I’d grown older. It was the show I’d put on when visiting a loved one in the hospital. A show that I watched with my patients at the mental health clinic I had worked at for seven years, a routine which unsurprisingly, I had discovered many of they had grown up with as well. Jeopardy was like sports for nerds with intellectual interests. It was one of the few things I could easily bond with my dad.
Alex Trebek and Jeopardy have a special place in my heart as it does for many Americans. It is now 9 pm. I have just watched the final episode of Jeopardy. Watched the final statement last Monday of Alex delivering a message of kindness during Thanksgiving and the pandemic; unaware that at age 80, he would pass from Stage 4 pancreatic cancer — something he’d been battling for over a year — just ten days later.
Today, we saw his final show air. A bittersweet farewell to a man who valued people, family, and intelligence. I saddened by this loss. Not just of a brilliant man who’d always been there throughout my 30+ years of living, but also one of the last anchors of the life I’d known before. At a time where tumultuous uncertainty is rampant just about everywhere, and a little routine like my regular daily television quiz TV show — was nice.
Alex’s final tribute is a highlight of his career. A person who loved what he did and got to spend many years relishing in that passion. Never acknowledging the last times were here. He couldn’t. Trebek was too caught up in the fun of the moment. Never questioning that not only would he beat this thing, but he’d continue on forever-and-ever.
Thank you, Alex Trebek, for years of entertainment. For being an anchor during the worst and most uncertain times. We will miss you tremendously.
All of the aforementioned terms almost sound musical. They hit the tympanic membrane as if it were a rhythm in a poem or a song… or a beat. The difference betwixt all six is that half are musical, half are detrimental to one enjoying music.
Let me preface this by saying I am not a drummer in the professional sense. I started drumming when I was twelve but since then have practiced on a few different instruments. I do, however, being the son of a music teacher do consider myself a musician.
Giving it some thought over the years, there are two things I fear losing: the auditory and the gustatory/olfactory. As a writer, I fear losing my sight or my ability to type, but they pale in comparison to the aforementioned. Accepting the loss of those things I would imagine is hard enough, but if music didn’t exist in my world, I wouldn’t know how to comply with the rest of the world itself.
In Sound of Metal (Amazon), drummer Ruben (Riz Ahmed) is living la bohème with his girlfriend/vocalist Lou (Olivia Cooke) in an RV trailer, transient across France. They play metal shows that rival the sonic youth of old Swans or 80s My Bloody Valentine (read: ear bleedingly loud) to modest venues and eke out a sonic existence for themselves.
For as frenetic and rage-filled as their sound maybe, they break the fast with a healthy meal and a healthy outlook on the day. They have a little bit of jazz and dancing with coffee and a heaping of love before they venture onto their next gig. It’s the true artist’s dream hoping to gain more traction. That is until Ruben begins to experience bouts of hearing loss.
Now, I believe we’ve all experienced those times that you may hear an infinitesimal but palpable ping in your ear. That is high-pitched ringing. It’s not a disease and it typically goes away. You may also have a hum in the drum and that would be Tinnitus, which would be something to look at.
Ruben is an unstoppable force but he soon meets an immovable object. Though it may come in increments, we also see as the audience an almost deleterious glimpse into a person that based his whole life on music. It is his life. It is akin to breathing and if breathing were not an option, music would he subsist on.
At first, we see the first stage of grief – denial. Ruben swears that even after storming off of a good set he is going to make this right, though admitting to his main muse that he cannot hear anymore. He can speak, but hearing is out of the question according to a doctor. He’s basically drummed away a lot of that. Hearing in a fit of anger after his doctor said the malaise could be a few days or a few hours, he goes out with a bang that he cannot hear.
After a bit of consoling and a call to his (what we can’t hear) sponsor, he is granted passage to a place to help him. He isn’t sure what’s in store for him, and the lack of hearing makes him that much angry and pensive, though understandably so. He is a musician. Hearing is all that he knows. It is all music to him. Until it’s not.
Traveling all the way to a community for D/deaf people, he is given a very clear and cutthroat choice. Either stay and relinquish your cell phone, adapting to the silence of sign language… or languish on your own.
For a former addict, the excruciating extricating of his flank hit him hard at first. It is a fish out of the water, with no water to wade in and no gills to go outside of his mentor, his only will to overcome this malady, this vast ocean.
Taken in by the sage Joe (Paul Raci), Ruben gives up the right to his cellular phone, his keys to the Studio RV he and Lou once shared, and his ego that precedes. He’s used to this, being a former addict, but in the community, the rules are very straightforward and to the point. Everything has to be communicated through sign language. For a musician, minus the phone, plus the cigarettes, this is a horror show.
Ruben is accepted almost immediately into the community, coming from a broken past and he takes a pause to the children he’s presented with to learn basic sign language from. It’s almost like learning music for the first time, save for the sound. Each gestural letter to the word, phrase to sentence to the question is kind of like a paradiddle. It starts off slow, but then it builds up to a crescendo until it’s just basically a song. At some point, he’s actually cozied up a friendship with Jenn (Chelsea Lee).
Ruben intermittently checks on the emails from Lou until there are none further on the office computer. Now, because he looks over his shoulder every time this happens, it’s supposed to be surreptitious, but I’m still not quite certain if he’s playing out of school or not.
Regardless, a drummer gets restless, as they are wont to do. From going through alphabetical sign language contests with other kids to adapting to not speaking unless it’s to his mentor Joe, a life he once knew is now fading off into the distance… Until one day a like-minded child and he decamp from one of the school’s talent shows to go outside, onto the playground. A mere metal slide catapulted him into where he wanted to be, his dharma.
As Ruben sits, ruminating on how everything’s come to pass at the end of the slide, the kid stares at him with curiosity. An interesting thing happens. Percussion. Through a series of bangs of fists on the slide between the both of them but felt equal, almost like musical telephony, they communicate without words. This is the first time in a long time Ruben has felt like Ruben.
Mind you, Joe has granted Ruben a room and fresh coffee in the morning if he just sits in a room with a pen and pad and just writes what he feels (no drawings) until he has to sit down and be one with it all. It’s what Joe does and he sees the potential in one he’s taken under his wing. This actually frustrates Ruben to no end, as he’s this pent up anger from a messed up childhood with addiction to boot. Just because you’re out of the weeds doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods and Joe (a former alcoholic) knows this. Let’s just label it the cold turkey of emotional baggage.
Ruben is getting on well though. He’s now teaching the children of the school how to drum and is having lively conversations at dinner! He’s now a seat at the table, proper, but he always did, he just didn’t know it.
That is, until one day when he sneaks into the office to see what Lou is up to. He goes onto their band website and realizes that his boo, the one who lovingly guided him into the community for his own mental health was going on a Grimes route. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the reference, Grimes, at least when she started out as a vocalist with a drum machine and a few effects pedals. Ruben’s talent has now been replaced with circuitry.
The thing is, the denial is still there and he within every fibrous sinew in his body wants to hear again. I mean, who doesn’t? Who doesn’t want to play music again? Who doesn’t want to go back on tour with their beloved?
The decision is heard loud and clear when Joe asks Ruben to think about the future. How many lives he’s affected, how much joy and hope he’s brought to the community. He, in so many words, is handing the baton over. Yeesh, that’s a lot to throw on a guy. Ruben proceeds that night to drum out his frustrations. Like, on an actual kit. Inside his RV.
Now the RV has been in the possession of Ruben all along, just not the keys. He knows all the keys to open up his Shangri-La though, so he and Jenn break-in and observe the lay of the land. The cost of a very expensive surgery that might bring his hearing back through Cochlear Implants has a tenuous track record. This isn’t due to the process because perfect science isn’t a science.
Ruben decides to pack it all up and sell it all out. The production board alone is a pretty penny. He’s belted out the night before one last swan song, so the drum set goes as well. All is clean throughout the vessel but the vessel itself.
He decides to sell it for about $26k with the proviso that in 8 weeks if he can’t collect on it, the ride is theirs. Mind you, it takes 4 weeks for the healing process to take hold, and in another 4 weeks, the process is ignited. He’s planned this out and clearly Joe’s heartfelt speech about staying in the community as his life was the tipping point.
CUT TO:
After the surgery, Ruben approaches Joe.
The surgery is over and now Ruben now has a confession to make. Joe does not take it lightly.
Basically, Ruben wants out. He still pines for his life outside of the community. There is something in him that at the time the community cannot provide. He’s running from comfort. He’s running from the unknown. I think we can all at points in our lives can vindicate that, for better or worse.
Comfort sometimes is scary. I know, it sounds like a dummkopf statement to make, but for some people, being on the edge of not knowing what is around the next corner is comfort… but isn’t that just an ouroborus? His flavor is to go with what he’s comfortable with, which is his former life.
Joe’s been his better angel in all of this time. He’s put up with his tantrums and his victories. The one thing he, by rules of Deaf culture, is that the people of the community see their hindrance as not one, but rather as a strength. To flavor the water in a phrase, he is poisoning the well.
Therefore, he must leave. Goodbye, free mattress and breakfast. Goodbye, the kids he’s so enriched but shall not again. Goodbye, the friends he would have made and may have dated (Lauren Ridloff).
HELLO, MOTEL.
It’s only temporary, as he’s tried to adapt to living with his new neural implants, though all sounds seem muddy and distorted. Let me remind you that these were never super hearing aids. They basically replicate what you MIGHT have heard in a past world with a so-so success rate, depending on the person.
Some things are coming in right, some things are coming in very wrong. It’s akin to basically flicking the switch on a radio dial and trying to find the right tune. Did I lose you millennials? Ah, well, fuck you guys. It was a very real thing. So is the hearing loss… so maybe next time you go down a suburban road blasting out whatever the fuck you have, take a second to think about not the other people around you, but the person in the car – YOU!
Gingerly stepping off my apoplectic soapbox, Ruben eventually finds the palatial home of Lou’s father, otherwise known as The Man (Bill Thorpe) in Belgium. Through a series of admissions and admonishing, we find out that A.) Lou is coming back tonight, B.) Her dad never liked Ruben C.) After Lou’s father’s wife killed herself, she garnered resentment for him and D.) Lou will be happy to see Ruben again.
Did you get all that? I think Ruben did, but he’s still hard of hearing and still trying to adapt, so I say, ignorance is bliss.
Once Lou arrives, she is shocked, pleased to see her old flame ignited anew. Lest we forget, her father is holding a soiree that night, and his daughter is to perform. It’s a lot to take in when you can only take in a certain amount and are still adapting, but Ruben is determined to get back to the good ole’ days. The halcyon days.
Later that night, at the party, Ruben feels completely out of place. The cacophony of the idle chatter makes his device go off the rails. It sometimes tunes in, other times, it’s just noise. I personally think, even with pitch-perfect hearing, that is the sound of people flocking to each other.
Do we truly have anything interesting to say at a party? It’s usually just banal small talk, which, oh, count that as one of my fears.
Either way, though Lou tries to engage her beloved in the conversation, he feels like an outsider, so that’s where he goes. To outer rims. He stands out looking in and sullen as Lou takes notice. The knife is twisted further when Lou and her pops perform a song written for her mother… almost a eulogy. He can’t even hear that properly with the surgery and he’s brought to tears.
Later that night, as they cuddle up, though they speak about a reunion, they both realize that they’ve saved each others’ lives for the best and that the band ain’t gettin’ back together. No time. No way. He saved her from self-destruction and she saved him by giving him the serenity to cope with things he cannot change.
As the dusk succumbs to the dawn, Ruben takes a look at his love and heads out the door. Quiet. Like a church mouse.
He puts on his hearing aids and realizes that they can hear slightly better, but the pealing of the church bell sounds like the cymbals that he used to pound on in his concerts and is disconcerts him. He takes them off and silence is now melodic.
SOLO:
Going into this film, I thought it was going to be about a drummer that guided his way through a tour with hearing loss. This was so much more. This goes through what are you if you’re not what you that you were destined to be. Though the first few minutes were a beautiful paeon unto the mastery of drumming (read: double bass drum), most of this film is filtered through our protagonist’s ears. We hear as he does. The loss of a basic human function through something we can still feel within our eustachian tubes is completely Oscar-worthy and the fact they deal with it through humanity is only right- it’s not solely poignant but rather poetic. This is a sleeper and anybody that has listened to music (I figure all of you) can agree, it would be a blessing to keep though ear drums nice and taut, like a snare.
Not like you can sleep on it anyway- the beats of this movie are savage enough to keep anybody up.
“I'm just afraid that if I died today my life would have amounted to nothing” - powerful words from Jamie Foxx’s Joe Gardner in Pixar’s Soul. Credit: Pixar/Disney
A movie about life, jazz, and New York City, Soul is a must watch film for every creative who’s ever wondered if their life has any worth. Myself included.
It starts with a moment. An off tune melody of Disney’s signature opening titles of When You Wish Upon a Star. Where Connie — a young lady about twelve years of age — holds her trombone up high inside her music classroom of M.S. 70. The ensemble, a group of kids, none of whom show any remarkable talent, play an ear splitting tune. Discordance and musical disharmony, yet at the heart of it plays Connie, who somehow, miraculously finds herself lost in jazz. The slide and wail at the metal brass, the girl is lost absolutely, in the playing of her trombone, and an improvised solo that effortlessly flows pouring at beautiful melodies. The soles of Connie’s feet giving way as if she were floating on air. Lost in the zone…
Before being surreptitiously grounded back to Earth by the sneerful cackling of her ensemble. Embarrassed, yet also, reassured. Because to her music teacher, Joey Gardner (Jamie Foxx), none of that matters. Joey praises Connie’s bravery. To live in the spark that lies the spirit of jazz. It is something magical. Something special. Something unique about losing oneself in that moment, because, according to Joey Gardner anyway, jazz brings out the most honest version of yourself.
This is what Pixar’s newest movie Soul is all about. The moments that make us feel alive. The moments that unceremoniously end. The struggle with the meanings that we attach to things. How to celebrate it. How to define it. And how to live life waking up every morning convincing ourselves that’s what we’re supposed to be. It’s the idea that creating something of worth is the only way to live a life worth meaning. All the while, absolutely forgetting, neglecting, abandoning, and admonishing, almost every bit of evidence to the contrary. A type of tunnel vision that art is the be all-end-all. The greatest thing in the whole wide universe. As a life without passion is a life without meaning.
It is the lie creatives tell ourselves. That the moment must always take our breath away, rather than accepting the harsh reality, that life mostly consists of the moments spent merely breathing.
What Is Soul About?
A buddy adventure story about life, dreams, and everything in between. Soul follows the story of recently deceased jazz teacher, Joe Gardner (Jamie Foxx) and his journey into the afterlife. A place where the souls of those who died mentor those yet to be born, before fully departing off into the great beyond.
Unwilling to accept his fate, Joe cleverly finagles his way back to Earth to accomplish his dream of playing with one of the last remaining jazz performing greats, Dorothea Williams (Angela Basset). All while playing mentor to the spirit of a reluctant to be born baby named 22 (Tina Fey). But back on this return toward Earth, things go awry, as 22 is now in the body of Joe while Joe became the hospital’s pet therapy kitty.
And yes, I know how absolutely ridiculous all of that sounds — though not any more ridiculous as the plot to Wonder Woman 1984 — but believe me when I say this premise is golden. Filled with genuine well-researched characters constructed out of conversations made with those prominent in the New York jazz scene.
It is a movie that’s less Woody Allen and more akin to something like The Good Place… Featuring existential philosophy without all of the rhetoric, but still delivers on a powerful lesson about living. Like the parable about what the young fish asked for from the old fish:
“What I want is to find the ocean.”
“We’re in the ocean right now?”
“This is water. What I want… is the ocean.”
Because the search for meaning in life is often what we’re surrounded in all along.
Why You Should Watch Soul
The movie’s use of lighting, field depth, and textures alone, is one of Pixar’s most technically ambitious films to date. From a writer’s perspective, this is also Pixar’s blackest film ever produced, with not only its first Black actor in a leading role in Jamie Foxx, but also, is genuinely well-researched in terms of its source material. As playwright Kemp Powers, the first Black co-director ever hired by Pixar to co-lead a project, was tasked in keeping the movie feeling as authentic as possible. A task which Powers accomplished by hiring several Black musicians and jazz consultants on retainer. There are many references to Charles Mingus and Duke Ellington in this movie. There were also major musical names signed on such as Herbie Handcock, Terri Lynn Carrington, Quest Love, Jon Batiste, and Daveed Diggs. With Jon Batiste both composing and performing original pieces for this movie.
Yet, despite early rave reviews, for the most part, this movie was seen an afterthought. A surprise hit, but not something expected or really wanted. I say this because the marketing for this movie pales in comparison to other classics. Especially when taken into consideration that this isn’t even the only Pixar movie release for the year, as Onward also came out way back before the pandemic started. Atop of this, this movie was a shadow in comparison to the press coverage for Wonder Woman 1984; all for what was an unspoken cultural battle between Black jazz versus the first woman superhero. Because that’s how buzzwords, and sadly trends, work in the coverage age of clickbait taboo. The blame of which falls upon Disney for moving the date to compete with Wonder Woman. An unsurprising move given the company’s shady track record of not wanting to portray black protagonists, mostly, to stay in good with the Chinese film market.
Soul Does All The Right Things
Pete Docter might be one of the most brilliant and heartfelt minds of a generation, being responsible for penning Pixar’s Up, Inside Out, and now Soul. He was also heavily involved in the American adaptation to Miyazaki’s Howl’s Moving Castle. Atop of adapting gems such as Wall-E, Toy Story, and really just, every major Pixar production ever created.
Atop of this, as someone who used to play in a jazz-funk fusion band and whose bandmates later went to school for jazz composition and performance, I am familiar with the NYC jazz scene. This movie is a perfect depiction of what that life was like set in what’s a really beautiful movie about a pre-coronavirus New York City. Likewise, this was one of the most genuine portrayals of New York. From the pizza rat, to all the best food places, to what it’s like to attend jazz clubs, to the school system; this movie genuinely depicts the heart and soul of NYC in a way most places haven’t, and it made me miss that era of life tremendously.
Everything about Soul touched on a profoundly real experience for me. As Pixar’s most acclaimed movie since Inside Out, I was genuinely taken aback how far away from your typical feel good movie this was. It was something that went away from the platitudes or the run on speeches that I, and the Jeff Wingers of the world, absolutely love doing. It was something that celebrated not the finality of things of life, death, nor humble beginnings; the moniker of that high water mark where the wave came crashing about the ocean of our lives came to pass.
To cut all the noise aside and remember that the point to life… is to live, is what Soul captures so beautifully.
Bridgerton is the gift from Netflix for viewers looking for a diverting drama filled with romance, fashion, gossip, and scandal.
There are a lot of important moments in episodes four to eight but here are a few to take special note off. Warning: MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
Daphne, the Prince, and a Duel
At another event, Prince Friedrich presents Daphne with a beautiful necklace with the Queen’s approval and even Lady Whistledown applauding the match. Miss Bridgerton is clearly flattered though we all know her heart is still with Simon. Speaking of the duke, he is still in town to support his friend Will’s boxing match and he runs into Anthony at their club. The viscount admits that his friend was being honorable with his sister when the prince arrives and asks Anthony for Daphne’s hand in marriage.
Daphne learns of this from her brother and he this time gives her the choice of whether to accept or not (finally learning from the disaster with Nigel Berbrooke). She thinks on it with her mother saying that if she cares more for the duke then she should go with her heart but daughter reveals the secret of her ruse with Hastings.
At the ball that evening, Daphne has chosen to wear the necklace the prince had given her, signifying that she’s made her choice. But just as Friedrich is on the verge of actually proposing she freaks out and takes her leave to get some air outside. She’s followed by Simon who is there to say goodbye. But these two can’t seem to keep away from each other and end up kissing until they are found by Anthony in the garden. The viscount demands that his friend marry his sister after defiling her but again Simon refuses and so the two men are headed for a duel at dawn the following morning.
Anthony gets Benedict as his second and Simon has his friend Will (who had found him drunk only a few hours earlier). Daphne forces Colin to tell her where the event is to take place and the two race over. Just as shots are fired she comes in between the two men with her horse throwing her off getting spooked from the sound. Miss Bridgerton is just fine though and berates the two for the idiocy of their actions and asks Simon if he would really rather die than marry her. The duke and her speak in private and he finally reveals that he won’t be able to give her children, something he knows that she very much wants. He asks her to let the two men continue their duel but Daphne makes the choice that she can deal with not having kids and says she and Hastings will be married.
The Featheringtons are Super Broke
Meanwhile, Marina is being setup with the very old Lord Rutledge by Lady Featherington and while it’s understandable why the younger woman is repulsed, the elder female brings up some good points that given her circumstances it’s a respectable match with someone in need of an heir and will not ask questions. In a surprise turn of events, a gentleman named Mr. Finch calls upon Philippa and Lady Featherington is beyond delighted that perhaps one of her own girls will also be wed this season. Her husband though seems to doubt it highly.
In fact, after another ball, Lord Featherington seems to have said something to Mr. Finch that has scared him away from Philippa. Lady Featherington demands to know what he said though he refuses to say. We discover that the baron has a gambling problem after he bet against the opponent of Simon’s friend Will in a recent boxing match. He’s actually broke and in debt and can’t pay their bills at the modiste or with other establishments. He is confronted by his wife who has gone through his ledger and knows that he squandered away even his daughters’ dowries. The man breaks down in tears confessing that he has no idea what to do.
Eventually though he comes up with a scheme and proposes to boxer Will that if the other throws his next fight he will pay him half the earnings. Will is understandably relunctant to do so because of his honor but Featherington says that he needs to think about life beyond the ring and how he can ensure that his family will be provided for in the future. The baron then contacts two questionable men to borrow money from in order to place a huge bet on Will’s next opponent. The two though know how the lord’s word is worthless but the nobleman gives them the deed to his house as collateral.
Will though agrees to Featherington’s proposal and throws his next match. Both men then have a sizeable fortune which seems to have solved the baron’s money problems. Except that the two loan sharks must have found out that he fixed the fight and at the end of the series he seems to have been killed for it.
We’re Engaged! But We Still Need Special Permission
Daphne returns to her family home pretending that she had just woken up and then soon after informed her mother that she was now engaged to the duke. While the two meet later on to promenade, Simon refuses to take their hand as people begin wishing them well on their upcoming nuptials. To make matters worse, at the modiste Daphne learns that Cressida saw her and Simon in the garden alone and threatens to make things very uncomfortable for her. The future duchess reminds the debutante of her soon-to-be new title and advises that the other woman not make an enemy out of her. This encounter though convinces Miss Bridgerton that they need to get married stat and for that they need a special license from the Archbishop of Canterbury.
Sadly their request is denied and it is Lady Danbury who informs the couple that they need to plead their case to Queen Charlotte who is miffed that her nephew was rejected. When they come to court, at first Daphne is floundering and not very convincing, given how tense things are between her and the duke. In a surprising move, Simon actually speaks the truth on how it wasn’t really love at first sight for them and how they had all been fooling everyone initially. But soon they formed a friendship and really enjoyed each other’s company. It took Prince Friedrich to make him realize that he wanted her. The queen is moved and asks Daphne if she wants to marry Simon.
She does and the two are married in a small ceremony filled with just family. At the after party the new bride talks to her mother about how nervous she is in getting fully intimate with her husband and Violet relents that she’s put off the conversation long enough and does a very basic explanation that the act will produce children. Daphne brings up the possibility of no children and the dowager viscountess says that they’ll be alright as long as they love each other. It’s important to note that many young ladies are completely sheltered from how procreation works. In earlier episodes Penelope and Eloise have no idea how it accomplished (though Penelope discovered some information from a pregnant Marina).
The following day the newlyweds depart the Hastings country estate but stop by an inn for the evening. They get separate suites per Simon’s request though eventually an upset Daphne prepares to march over to her husband’s room when she opens the door and he is standing outside. They finally have an honest though heated conversation where the duke says that everything he said to the queen is true and that he burns for her. The duchess says that if he took the time to look at her for more than two seconds he would realize that she too burns for him and the two consummate their marriage.
Benedict Gets a Little Improper
In the meantime, second brother Benedict was extended an invitation by prominent artist Sir Henry Granville who’s painting he critiqued earlier to see the man’s more private works. It turns out to be kind of a den of iniquity with lots of nude models, drinks, and people engaging in torrid affairs. Henry convinces Benedict that as second sons they gave to have fun without the burden of responsibility on their shoulders. The second eldest Bridgerton ends up having a threesome with Madame Delacroix and Mrs. Granville after he witnesses his host kissing Lord Wetherby in another room.
Later at another party, Benedict speaks to Henry about what happened and the other man states that he’s in love with Wetherby and he has an understanding with his wife that affords her the protection that comes with marriage. The artist explains how he and his love cannot even openly look at each other without fear and their conversation gives Benedict the courage to pursue his own relations with the modiste and hang impropriety. However, it is important to point out that a nobleman having an affair with a tradeswoman during that time period wouldn’t be as damaging to his reputation. For the modiste though it’s a different story as a woman making her own way in the world without the protection of a man.
Queen Charlotte Tasks Eloise with Unmasking Lady Whistledown
This season Eloise has been on the case in trying to unmask Lady Whistledown. She’s suspected that perhaps their housekeeper is the mysterious writer much to the chagrin of said woman after discovering her young mistress snooping in her room. At her sister’s wedding party Queen Charlotte overhears of her efforts and charges Eloise in officially discovering the gossip writer’s identity. The second Bridgerton daughter thinks that it could be a tradesperson who would be around a lot of the nobility in order to glean juicy details. While she bounces off her theories with bff Penelope, the other woman is a bit preoccupied with her own troubles regarding Marina and Colin.
She ends up telling Queen Charlotte her theory at a symphony but is dismissed discovering that her majesty has hired a team of Bow Street Runners to do a proper investigation. However just because she was no longer commanded by her monarch, Eloise still wants to discover Lady Whistledown’s identity after the latest gossip sheet revealed Marina’s pregnancy this entire season and thus damaging the reputation of all the Featheringtons. She is determined to eventually force the writer to print a retraction to restore Penelope’s status in society. Her main suspect ends up being Madame Delacroix whom as a modiste would be exposed to many of the noble families from the Ton. She first realizes the possibility after a carriage ride with Benedict where they stop by and pick up the other woman on the way to another party as Eloise is dropped off at home.
She returns to the modiste the following morning on the guise that she needs another dress for her sister’s ball. Eloise then says that the Featheringtons are still suffering from Lady Whistledown’s latest column and wishes that the author would write something flattering about them. Madame Delacroix responds that perhaps she will because the woman clearly knows what’s good for her business and angering loyal customers is not good. Eloise agrees saying that whether the loyal customers are Featheringtons or even Bridgertons, Whistledown might want to examine what she writes about both families. The young lady then adds that it’s said men can withstand gossip and rumors but she’s not so sure about that, especially with her brother. The tradeswoman then tells Eloise that she has no intentions of compromising anyone. Miss Bridgerton is relieved but says that the Queen is enraged and that whomever Lady Whistledown is should be careful because she would hate for her to be silenced before she could make things right. The modiste comments that she thinks Whistledown is able to take care of herself.
At the night of her sister’s ball, Eloise at first tries to approach Queen Charlotte but is stopped by her gossipy servant Brimsley. He reveals that they plan on unmasking Whistledown tonight after discovering that the writer delivers her missives to a printers press on Lombard street while the Ton are distracted by big events. Eloise then takes it upon herself to help the other woman out by convincing the family carriage driver to take her to Lombard street. She arrives in time and is able to warn the carriage baring Lady Whistledown that it’s a trap. She only finds out later on from Benedict that he was at another party with the modiste all night and so the tradesperson could not have been the gossip columnist.
Anthony and the Opera Singer
As much as he tries, Anthony can’t seem to forget his opera singer Siena even though the woman seems to have moved on to a different lover. Before the duel with Simon (after discovering his sister in his arms in the garden), Anthony comes to her and says that he realizes what fool he was and he still wants to protect her and because of his possible impending death, Siena relents again. But eventually, after he asks her to publicly attend a ball held by the Duke and Duchess of Hastings with him, she turns him away. Anthony finds Siena’s new lover at the door and she comes over and asks the other man to wait for her upstairs. She turns to the viscount and says that he must let her go because the truth is that their circumstances will never work and he will always choose family and title above all else. Her new man knows exactly who and what she is and doesn’t ask her to change nor does she want too. Anthony’s heart is broken but understands and finally walks away from her.
This subplot is an interesting one to see the way in which society places rules upon women deemed proper or improper. The Ton will never view Siena as a real lady worthy of marriage because of her station in life.
It’s Complicated Between Penelope, Colin and Marina
Marina Thompson has decided that her best bet is Colin Bridgerton who seems genuinely interested in her instead of the horrid Lord Rutledge. She asks Lady Featherington to give her some time to secure a proposal from the third Bridgerton son and if not she’d marry the elder nobleman. Marina is even willing to go as far as seducing and entrapping the young man in order to secure marriage despite Penelope trying to intervene with her mother that he was too young to really consider settling down.
That evening Pen tries to plead with Marina not to do this to Colin but she refuses and says that she will be a good wife to him. Colin and Marina end up being alone and she tries to kiss him but he steps away saying that she is a lady. Mr. Bridgerton though then asks her to marry him at the end of the season and she accepts. He makes an announcement later on much to the shock of his own mother. As the two families are together the following evening, Pen can’t stand by and do nothing while he is used by Marina and attempts to tell Colin of the other woman’s love for Sir George Crane (who is the actual father of her child) but the action backfires as he doesn’t seem to care for a person Marina had previously had affections for, believing her to love him. When said pregnant lady appears saying that Penelope’s mother is looking for her, she suggests to Colin that they should run away together to Gretna Green and he agrees to make arrangements.
Undeterred, Pen finds the love letters written by Sir George to Marina and compares them to the most recent one from Spain and discovers that it has to be a forgery. She tries to convince the other woman that the rejection letter is not from the man she actually loves but Marina says it doesn’t matter. He still never wrote her back and she had to think of the life of her child now.
Things take a turn for the worse when Lady Whistledown reveals to the Ton that Marina had been pregnant the entire season. This causes the engagement between her and Colin to end with Daphne coming back into town to support her family. The duchess arranges a meeting between the two where Marina admits that it is true that she is pregnant and Colin says that had she been truthful from the beginning he would have married her regardless.
Marina’s options dwindle as the Featheringtons are ostracized from polite society for this scandal. However, Daphne Bridgerton feels compelled to help after her own difficulties with her marriage and children. The duchess offers to try and find Sir George Crane for Marina by making inquiries with General Langham. She is able to make contact with his wife Kitty as both women were invited to Lady Danbury’s soiree for married women of society. The other woman provides an address to where Daphne can write to him too though when she tells Marina the news Miss Thompson informs her that the general won’t respond. He would only do so if the duke had also signed his name on the missive.
Feeling desperate, Marina ends up brewing a tea meant to abort the baby and she thinks she’s accomplished that after Pen finds her nearly passed out in her room. An unexpected visit occurs though when Sir George’s brother Philip arrives to bring the unfortunate news that his elder sibling had died in the battlefield several weeks ago and he had found a letter partially written to Marina. He had no idea where to locate her though until Daphne’s inquiries to the general. He actually proposes to the mother of his late brother’s child because he believes it is the honorable thing do. She though refuses him because she does not know him despite Lady Featherington ask why after the gentleman leaves. Marina believes she is no longer pregnant and so doesn’t need to marry, she just wants to go home.
But turns out she’s still pregnant after all and a doctor called in says she’s crazy to think that a tea would abort the baby. Marina ends up accepting Sir Philip’s proposal and asks Lady Featherington for advice on how to deal with a loveless marriage. The elder woman says that she’ll find small things and eventually it’ll be enough.
Meanwhile, Colin apologizes to Penelope (Daphne had ended up personally inviting the Featheringtons herself to give the family a second chance) at the Hastings ball that he understands she was just trying to protect him from becoming heartbroken. Just when it seems that Pen is finally mustering the courage to reveal her love for him, he announces that he’s leaving for a trip to the continent the following morning.
The Duke and Duchess of Hastings
Life as a married couple in the beginning seemed to be going well with some hiccups like Daphne not calling a winner of best hog at the country fair causing the tenants of the area to be super pissed because that meant no one won a contract to provide meat to the estate. The new duchess was also rubbing her new housekeeper the wrong way though eventually she is able to rectify her errors.
Initially marital relations between the newly weds is incredibly vigorous and the two seemed happy until Daphne started to put two and two together and asked her ladies maid Rose how kids are really made. She then realized that Simon wasn’t entirely truthful with her in letting her believe that he couldn’t have kids when the reality was that he wouldn’t have them. She ends up tricking him one night and he’s shocked at what she’s done to which she feels justified in her actions thinking that this might be her only opportunity to get pregnant. When he asks why she angrily says that she finally figured it out and that he lied to her.
What follow is many tense scenes where the couple hardly acknowledge each other and are just going through the motions and pretending that all is well in the company of other people. They end up returning to London after Daphne discovers the scandal involving her brother. She ends up going to the Bridgerton town house where she ends up arranging a meeting for Colin and Marina to talk and the other woman does admit the truth of her pregnancy. Later on Daphne visits the Featherington home to apologize to the expectant mother for judging her strongly and wishes to help her find Sir George. That unfortunately did not turn out as planned as while they did find out what happened to him through his brother Philip (the unfortunate soldier had died in Spain), Marina ended up making the difficult choice of accepting the other gentleman’s proposal in proxy.
After Daphne returns home from attending a married ladies of the Ton event at Lady Danbury’s, she sees Simon tending to a wound on his head courtesy of a heated fight with her brother at their club. Earlier the two men came to blows after Anthony said that Simon doesn’t know how to properly run a household because his father never showed him how while Simon retorts that Anthony was doing a horrible job at it and that his own father must be deeply ashamed. Ouch. As she actually still cares and loves him, Daphne starts to clean her husband’s cut and he finally admits to her that he made a vow at his father’s deathbed that the Hastings line would die with him. She gets upset all over again that he’d rather keep his vow to a dead man whom he hated than to give himself the chance at happiness with her. But not to worry because her period is supposed to come in a few days and he adds that if she’s actually pregnant he will do his duty to them and if not well that was that and they’d continue to live separate lives. While attending the a few days later, Daphne’s courses come and she ends up sobbing in the arms of her mother.
Now that the couple knows that she isn’t pregnant they are holding one final ball for the season and will depart not too long after that. Before leaving for Will’s boxing match, Daphne asks Simon about his childhood, but he refuses to answer her. She ends up in his study where she finds all the unopened letters that he had written to his father as a child. Lady Danbury then arrives asking if the duchess had forgotten that they were to prepare for the ball tonight together. Daphne then decides to ask the elder noblewoman about the former duke and how she helped her husband overcome his speech impediment. Lady Danbury explains how the odious man expected only perfection from his son and she only helped Simon but it was his triumph alone for overcoming all of the challenges he faced growing up.
The ball ends with a downpour of rain as Lady Danbury ushers all the other guests out to give the newlywed their time alone to talk. Daphne accepts that she can’t control everything and tells Simon that she found the letters he wrote to his father as a child and that she understands why he thinks he’s unworthy of her love. All she wants is for him to be happy and she accepts all of him even the parts that he thinks are broken and damaged. Simon says that he doesn’t want to be alone but also doesn’t know how to be the man she deserves. Daphne patiently tells him that all he needs to do is to stay and work this out with her day by day. They finally reconcile and the duke is able to get passed his vow to his father.
Months later we see Daphne is giving birth with Violet and Simon by her side to a baby boy whose name will begin with a letter “A.” Family traditions after all.
The Biggest Mystery of Them All: Lady Whistledown Revealed
I must admit that I wasn’t expecting the first season to reveal the identity of Lady Whistledown so soon but at the very end of episode 8 audiences are shown who was sitting inside the carriage that Eloise warned the night of the Hastings ball. As the figure pushes down her hood we see Penelope Featherington with an impish smile on her face.
In the books we don’t find out who the author is until the fourth novel in Romancing Mr. Bridgerton so I am hoping that if the show is renewed for season two we will see how Pen continues to evade detection especially with bff Eloise still on the case. Since Miss Bridgerton now knows that she was wrong in assuming Madame Delacroix was the writer, will she continue to try and discover the truth? The biggest clue as to Lady Whistledown’s identity was her lack of content when the Featheringtons were shunned by London society. It was also a big risk for her to print the story on Marina knowing that it would damage her whole family’s reputation. She was willing to do that because of how much she loved Colin, but it also made her an unlikely suspect because why would she write such awful things about her own family.
Pen is the wallflower that no one pays attention too and is often viewed by other debutantes as timid and easily preyed upon. But she’s stands up for what she believes is right and is very intelligent and clever. It’s the ultimate con that she’s been able to dupe the entire Ton though time will tell how long she can manage to do so.
Final Thoughts
Where has Francesca been this whole time? In Bath learning new pianoforte pieces! In any case she finally returns in episode 8 though why she wasn’t called back to attend her eldest sister’s wedding seems weird.
The series didn’t shy away from addressing important issues such as classism, sexism, and racism. While on the surface it is a romantic drama filled with fashion and scandal, it also touched on topics like greed, vanity, addiction, pride, and prejudice. All in all it hooked you in and wouldn’t let go until you finished all eight episodes.
That’s it for season one of Bridgerton! It was a delightful holiday gift from Netflix and here’s hoping for more seasons to come.
At long last, Bridgerton is finally here as a holiday present for viewers wanting some scandal and romance in their Netflix queues. Based on the Bridgerton series of novels by author Julia Quinn, the show is akin to Gossip Girl meets Jane Austen and follows the lives of a powerful high society family as they navigate the world of Regency London to find love and happiness.
Here are the must know moments from the first three episodes.
Daphne Bridgerton’s 5-Star Rating at Court
The series begins with many a young debutante being presented to Her Royal Majesty Queen Charlotte at court. This signifies that they are officially out in society and are now eligible to be married. The queen though is super bored by proceedings as every young miss is hoping to catch the favor of the monarch. However, only Daphne Bridgerton is singled out as Queen Charlotte calls her “flawless.” But of course, that comes with its own challenges as her peers now see her as the ultimate competition in the marriage mart.
On the first edition of the gossip sheet Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers, Daphne is given glowing commendations as this season’s diamond of the first water because of the Queen’s favor. However, the bigger they come, the harder they fall. Sure enough the young lady’s marriage prospects take a dismal turn no thanks to her eldest brother Anthony who sees it fit to scare away every suitor because he deems them unworthy of his sister. Soon the gentlemen move on from Daphne to Miss Marina Thompson whom Lady Whistledown now writes as the real incomparable of the season to the error of the Queen.
Simon and Daphne’s Agreement
Daphne is getting desperate as her brother is unrelenting in his protection and the only suitor she now has is the odious Nigel Berbrooke. In comes Simon Bassett, the newly situated Duke of Hastings who has returned to London after his father’s death. Simon is considered the Ton’s most eligible bachelor and thus the prize of matchmaking mamas for their unmarried daughters.
At another party, Nigel attempts to accost Daphne after she goes off by herself for a few moments. Simon hears the commotion and is about to come rescue her when she punches Lord Berbrooke in the face and knocks him out cold. The duke then laughs that Miss Bridgerton has a great swing and then has an idea that could be advantageous for the both of them. He suggests that they form an attachment to each other so that Lady Whistledown and the other society mothers will think he is unavailable while Daphne will be seen as desirable by other gentlemen. The two must make people believe they are madly in love with each other and that will require that they be seen together at various functions, he sends expensive flowers, and they promenade.
Nigel Berbrooke’s Blackmail Plans Go Awry
After the dowager Viscountess Violet Bridgerton scolds her eldest son for sabotaging his sister’s marriage prospects she says that if his father was still alive Daphne would already be married because he would have made arrangements for his daughter. She wants Anthony to do his duty as head of the family and not just as a brother. However, Violet was expecting that he support her and Lady Danbury’s plans of pairing Simon and Daphne but instead the viscount picks Nigel Berbrooke. That is just gross.
Anthony tells his mother and sister that it’s been settled and that he’s come to an agreement with the much older nobleman. Understandably both women protest but he will have none of it. Later at a party, Simon finds out what Anthony has planned for his sister and he relents and tells his friend about how Nigel tried to manhandle Daphne which effectively ends their agreement. Lord Berbrooke then follows the duke outside and demands to be told if he’s already slept with Miss Bridgerton and then taunts him about his own family history which leads to Simon beating the fool.
Not to be deterred, Nigel then comes to the Bridgertons at the park with a special marriage license and effectively threatens them if he doesn’t marry Daphne don’t marry he will reveal to the world that they had been alone together to ruin the young lady’s reputation and thus affecting the entire family. However, Violet is invited to tea at Buckingham Palace with Queen Charlotte and it is the monarch who offers some subtle advice on how to deal with the Berbrooke problem.
Violet invites Nigel’s mother over for tea and a Bridgerton housemaid discovers that the horrid man had gotten one of his own servants pregnant with a son and sent them both away without supporting his child. Armed with this knowledge, the women of the Bridgerton household spread the gossip like wildfire and soon enough it is featured in Lady Whistledown’s paper and Nigel is called away for urgent business. That was a pretty damn satisfying solution.
Anthony Bridgerton’s Dilemma: Responsibility vs. Paramour
Meanwhile, eldest Bridgerton Anthony has been harboring a not so well-kept secret of a mistress that even his mother knows about. He has been sleeping with the talented opera singer Sienna and even set her up in rented apartments across town. He had promised to always protect her and yet after Violet tells him that he’s skirting his own responsibilities of providing an heir he ends his relationship with the singer because he has to do what is necessary. Anthony had initially thought that with three other brothers he could count on one of them to provide a child to inherit the family title.
He’s torn between his affection for Sienna and his duties of always putting family above all else. To be honest I can’t really ship them as I really want to see Anthony’s storyline in The Viscount Who Loved Me play out on the show. Though I sympathize with Sienna’s character because she’s just trying to survive with the very limited options she has. As she said to Anthony, not all women have the luxury of being protected as his sister has.
Miss Marina Thompson and Her Shocking Secret
Newcomer Marina Thompson is the unexpected belle of the season having come from the country to stay with her distant cousins the Featheringtons. Lady Featherington is of course displeased as she has her own three girls who are on their first season. But her husband commands it so that Miss Thompson also be included and because of her beauty becomes the object of affection of many gentlemen.
However, it is discovered that Marina harbors a very big secret: she’s pregnant and has been since coming to London. The housekeeper realizes that the young lady hasn’t had her period in the entire month that she’s been in residence and relays the info to the lady of the house who then confronts her guest about it. Marina though doesn’t cower and stands up for herself, saying that she didn’t even want to be here to begin with and that earns her a slap across the face. Lady Featherington is more concerned about how the news will adversely affect her own daughters by association and so she decided to keep Marina confined to her room until she can figure out what to do.
Youngest daughter Penelope, who is the only Featherington with a brain and a kind heart, befriends her cousin and learns that she loved a man named Sir George Crane who was currently fighting for king and country in Spain. They have been secretly in correspondence with each other though Marina hasn’t heard back from him in quite some time. Soon though a letter from Spain does arrive but it’s one that seems to confirm what Lady Featherington has tried to tell the younger woman that men often do not want the responsibility of a child out of wedlock. The missive breaks Marina’s heart but in truth it had been penned by the mistress of the house with her housekeeper to make certain that the chit moves on and finds a proper husband. The elder woman needs her to get married asap to a man who won’t ask questions so that her own daughters won’t be compromised by the situation. Marina finally relents and is determined to move on and find herself a match.
A Prince Arrives
Queen Charlotte introduces her nephew the Prussian Prince Friedrich to the Ton and he becomes the most eligible bachelor now, replacing the Duke of Hastings. Friedrich genuinely seems like a nice guy and at his first London party tells all the young ladies he is introduced to that their gowns are exquisite, earning a snorting laugh from Daphne after Simon explains to her that this is a generic line. She though instantly catches his eye though Cressida Cowper has her own plans for the prince.
Cressida taunts Daphne at the modiste soon after the other young lady was just told by Simon that he was ending their arrangement because she now has a bevy of suitors and he was planning to leave London asap. The snide debutante thanks Miss Bridgerton that if she hadn’t been occupied by the duke then she (Cressida) wouldn’t have been able to snag the prince. This though has the opposite effect on Daphne and fuels her to secure the prince’s affection. She dresses up purposely for the royal at the very next party and he is naturally smitten and forgets all about Cressida. Queen Charlotte looks super pleased by this turn of events while Simon who ends up attending the event is shocked and leaves.
Final Thoughts
The first three episodes of Bridgerton were a delightful and I’m definitely hooked in. I especially loved the subplots with Eloise and Benedict who share some similarities as two characters looking for more than what society expects of them. Eloise doesn’t want to get married, wanting to do more with her life and become a writer, while Benedict dreams of being an artist and not just the second son of a noble house. Both love their family of course but struggle with the roles they are meant to fulfill. Eloise though aptly points out that Benedict is a man and is afforded the freedom to live boldly should he so choose it. She isn’t given that option at all.
I also really loved the friendship between Penelope and Eloise because it is such an important part of the book series. Nicola Coughlan and Claudia Jessie were perfect in their roles and had great chemistry with each other as bffs. Noticeably missing though was Francesca Bridgerton whom I only recall seeing in the first episode. We saw more of youngest Hyancinth than the third daughter.
Still the characters were perfectly captured from the outspoken Lady Danbury to the cruel Cressida Cowper. The tone of varying relationships were also presented well from the friendship and growing tension between Daphne and Simon, Simon and Lady Danbury’s surrogate parent-child setup, the Bridgerton family’s close dynamics, Penelope’s discomfort with her own mother and sisters, Anthony’s secret relations with Sienna, and more.
Perhaps though my favorite part of the show so far has been Julie Andrew’s voice overs as the enigmatic Lady Whistledown. Very curious to see how the show will eventually reveal the identity of the author, though hopefully it’s not going to be done ala Gossip Girl because it was accomplished so beautifully in the books.
Wonder Woman 1984, the long anticipated heroine sequel, has a lot of heart but fails to make a true impact. [SPOILER-Free]
The first big superhero blockbuster to come out in a nearly a year, Wonder Woman 1984 was a fun follow-up to the 2017 smash hit, and, in a lot of ways, the viewing experience parallels the original. Like with the first Wonder Woman, the movie had a strong beginning, ramped up to a compelling second act, and kind of floundered out in the third act. I really was hoping that WW84 would stick the landing, but it ended up going the way of 90% of superhero movies now a day.
The Plot
Set in 1984 (hence the title), Diana (Gal Gadot) has spent decades trying to move on from the heartbreak of WWII and loss of Steve Trevor (Chris Pine). Now working in the Smithsonian as a senior anthropologist, she balances her (lack of) private life while starting to be Wonder Woman in the public eye. Meanwhile, the world is super 80s, including a retro commercial from an oil tycoon, Maxwell Lord (Pedro Pascal) promising Americans the chance to live out their dreams. The monotony is shaken when some ancient artifacts acquired by the FBI make their way to Diana and colleague Barbara Minerva (Kristen Wiig).
The Cast
The performances in this franchise has honestly been mostly stellar (aside from the odd casting of David Thewlis as Ares in the first one). All of the talent puts in strong performances for the sequel and drives the movie.
Gal Gadot clocks in another solid performance as the titular character and actually does a better job in this one compared to the original. She has a better grasp of the character and effectively delivers on the different emotional levels required of the story. It’s also sweet seeing her continue her chemistry with Chris Pine, who’s back again (won’t tell you how). That man is a joy to watch and a lot of fun as he oozes charisma.
The villain side of the cast also has some studs with Pedro Pascal putting in an eye-catching performance that he clearly had fun portraying, kind of like a Gene HackmanLex Luthor but turned up to 11. The biggest nod, though, needs to go to Kristen Wiig. In a change from her usually comedic roles, she exceeded expectations and blew her part out of the water. In what feels like a nod to a Michelle Pfeiffer’s Catwoman from Batman Returns, it really helped round out the movie and give us a nice change from Gadot’s Diana.
The Vision
I think the biggest issue I had with this movie was the inconsistency in visual tone.
What do I mean by that? Well, first off, the movie tries to balance the feel of an 80’s movie, which can be seen in certain characters and actions scenes, and the appeal of modern comic book action movies. Unfortunately, the imbalance seems to miss the mark. Where the first one succeeded in making a period piece with an uniting aesthetic tone, WW84 ended up going to both extremes too much, robbing the film of a cohesive style.
The parts that did truly embrace the 80s were fun, which can be seen throughout the movie through wardrobe selection and set design. The issue is that these scenes don’t really transition well to certain action scenes and various set pieces. To look at movies that does this well, one would look towards the recent string of X-Men movies (First Class, Days of Future Past, and even Apocalypse).
Veering off the narrative appearance, the action sequences seemed to really suffer from this visual variety. One scene, a flashback to Themyscira, is the closest to the execution of the first one, with the rest of the movie’s action being a bit odd. This movie, unlike the first, relies HEAVILY on Wonder Woman using her Lasso of Truth to swing, and those visuals were truly distracting. There is a mall action scene that almost seems like it was taken out of an 80s movie, but this contrasts poorly to later fight scenes that are more in line with the DCEU.
Speaking of the visuals, ooof. The scenes that were rooted in practical effects with slight digital touch-ups were far superior to fight scenes that were heavily green-screened. A few times in the movie, we get close-ups of Gadot with an obvious green screen behind her, and it is very tough to watch.
The Takeaway
Wonder Woman 1984 is a fun movie, don’t get me wrong. If you enjoyed the first one, you are not going to be greatly disappointed. It tries to do a lot, but the climax was too far-fetched for me to truly buy in. It has some great themes and moral statements, but a lot of it is too neatly cleaned, and, like the first one, I felt the third act failed to deliver.
Final Thought
If you are going to watch it, tamper expectations and research the way you are going to watch it. There have been issues with streaming, and STAY AWAY FROM HBO MAX’S ROKU APP.
How does one define an act of war? It may have to do with someone encroaching upon another’s territory. If the landscape isn’t owned, however, it’s not an act of war but rather a game. It’s not like a sports team has preemptive points on the scoreboard and the other tries to overtake them. This is something of a new frontier, especially with space exploration and habitation. Whoever is at the vanguard controls the game until the other team keeps fighting to win. It’s not dissimilar to the Wild West and the Gold Rush. Unclaimed territory anybody can fight for (though it did truly belong to others before) but let’s focus on what is not claimed, but rather what the flag planters and what assholes they can be (on either side.) In the final of Space Force (Netflix) titled “Proportionate Response”, we will see what heady humans will go to stake their claim. Human nature? Ha! The animal kingdom is really the only group that has it down to a beautiful science.
Surrounded by his military constituents, General Mark Naird (Steve Carell) stares down what is the rough situation of an American lunar-based flag being run over by the Chinese like some teenage puck running over a driving cone just because they can.
Secretary of Defense John Blandsmith (Dan Bakkedahl) suggests hitting back hard and though General Kick Grabaston (Noah Emmerich) suggests escalating by dropping a bomb, Mark asserts that you cannot kill for another insulting a symbol. Commandant of the Marine Corps (Patrick Warburton) skirts by General Naird’s diplomacy and opts for full-on invasion, to which both Chief of Naval Operations (Jane Lynch) and General Rongley (Diedrich Bader) agree with.
Since going scorched literal earth isn’t an issue since this transpired in space, Mark refers to the International Space Treaty for a non-virulent retaliation corollary to the act itself. Helping him is a focus group spearheaded by Fuck Tony (Ben Schwartz). Hoo, boy.
He leads in by asking the group the positives of space exploration but careens into a hard left when told that they wouldn’t support a war on the moon, showing them the “incident”. This does rile up the group, but their proposed solutions all amount to puerile chicanery.
Elsewhere on the base, Erin (Diana Silvers) enjoys not only her boozed-up acai but also her handiwork, scrawling “CHEATER” onto Kelly King’s (Jessica St. Clair) car with mustard as her medium.
Dr. Adrian Mallory (John Malkovich) isn’t having it any easier, in Mission Control, as the crew lacks essential tools for maintenance of their ship nor of their hygiene. It’s never a good look when someone like Obie is confusing a basic wrench as a “metal moon scoop” to collect lunar samples. There’s no time for Adrian to hang his head in shame, though as a sudden puncture in their base is of more import. To pour salt in the wound as well, the Chinese have released footage of their plush space station.
Erin is fired. Mark is fired up. F. Tony’s solutions are impotent-on-arrival. What’s more, with the Joint Chiefs on the horn awaiting an update, unless Mark can show them he knows what side of the bread is buttered, he’s goddamned toast.
Though Mark has unfettered clearance to attack the Chinese Lunar Base, he leads in with Fuck Tony’s solutions. This exposure of his underbelly has John Blandsmith furious, wanting to use exploit astronaut Eddie’s (Chris Gethard) arsonist past for their personal gain. General Naird refuses to put non-combatant scientists in harm’s way and the rest of the team starts to step over to Mark’s side, as are beginning to see what’s diplomatic. Still, an unhinged Secretary of Defense won’t take “no” for an answer.
Turning to the only mind that can unravel this revelry du fuckery, Mark confers with Adrian. This poses a problem though, with Dr. Mallory’s name being attuned to the first Lunar atrocity that may happen. His good name is on that dubious plaque as much as Mark’s is, should this shit go awry, so they need to brainstorm, and how!
General Naird tells Captain Ali to look into the lockers with astronaut Obie as her onlooker. There were supposed to be a space-ready armament contained therein, which is a gun-glory of firepower. All must learn how to use them in case of conflict, should that arise. Julio Diaz (Hector Duran) expresses fear in that they may have the tools of warfare as well. Well, it remains to be seen as they peacefully clean their weapons of war. Is this possible? Would it make the textbooks or be a pox in the textbooks?
Back on the base, Dr. Mallory already has fighting words with General Naird- albeit from like four literal levels apart. At this point, their misunderstanding of John Wayne and Wayne John (a guy who slighted Adrian for stealing his pencils) was a bit of sly humor which I can truly appreciate in this zero hour. The confrontation though leads to Mark’s bestie to hand in his resignation. Imagine how that fight would go if they were in space? It would be going through the proper channels and through notes, as the gravity of the situation takes it all. That, in a nutshell, is their relationship.
We’re, however, here on Earth, where things land densely and with a THUMP.
In Mission Control, Dr. Chan (Jimmy O. Yang) has a chance to catch a quiet moment with Captain Ali. The flirtation escalates further without any creepy undertones and in fact, underplayed for a nice romantic effect. Those that can speak so many words of love without saying it are in my mind, the sweetest.
Speaking of blossoming love, Mark and Kelly King (Jessica St. Clair) clear all of this out with a romantic dinner of wine and plain spaghetti. It’s not that Mark doesn’t know how to cook, but it’s just that he’s given up. His aide de camp said sayonara and he’s left verklempt.
On this hot food that’s now cooling, only Mark’s cooler head is prevailing because he may have to head soldiers into the battlefield of the unknown, and neither sustenance nor sex can stray him from the worry of uncertainty. It doesn’t make him hungry.
Kelly reaffirms him about his asking her out, and in spite of the consequences, he went with his gut anyway. Reinstilling that hunger in him, he wants the full course.
The next morning, as Adrian’s filling his humorously small cardboard box (which would otherwise be filled with a plant) with an African mask, Mark wants Adrian’s help to defy an Order. The brilliant mind is piqued! What is it? Passive aggression! Mind games are the only war games. They are used in chess, they are used on the battlefield. It’s non-violent and effectiveness is second to none… So Mark does just that… and anxiously awaits his job as Adrian is calm about it.
At an off base convenience store, Erin asks a few guys for a smoke. She’s had enough of her restricted existence and wants some freedom. The only thing is that bites her in the ass when a delinquent trio in a pickup truck picks her up. Hey, teenagers do dumb things. I can’t say I was ever arrested for some dumb shit, but I also can’t say there wasn’t some dumb shit I did that I should’ve been arrested for.
Back where things are just a hair saner, Adrian spouts out things that would only in effect help the Chinese. Blandsmith is awaiting his return and though Mark’s innards are in knots at the moment, Erin’s are in a ton more. She’s in the middle of the desert (‘member, it’s Colorado?) basically kidnapped by a bunch of base-heads, sans the ropes, and accouterment.
She would call her father if her cellular service weren’t so shitty. Moreover, Grabaston is ready to set this Catherine wheel in motion.
This leaves General Naird to address Captain Ali directly. He recalls from the first episode when she disobeyed an order… and now requests her to do it again. He engages in a moving, simple, yet elegant monologue ending with “the real enemy is arrogance.” This is something Adrian silently bows his brow in agreeance with.
Marks grand scheme? Disassemble the firearms and use them to build up the base. When they go right, you go left. ALWAYS. The best offensive is a greater defense, AmIRight?
Now though Kick Grabaston tries to blow down Naird’s kingdom to come, the one and oafish but lovable Duncan Tabner (Spencer House) to no avail. It’s too late, though. Though he orders Mark to attack, he has no true skin in this game of warfare. In fact, you can say early on, he shoved his dick in his own mouth (ohh, not the foot, that would be too easy.)
Though General Naird is arrested by the Commanding Officer, attacks are not possible as all the weapons are disabled. So what is this warmonger’s next move? Attack them with the only thing they have, which is an abundance of wrenches?
Captain Ali’s game day speech to her team is to basically go out and ready for war. What is that war you speak of?
With Lunar vehicles blazing and moon dust flying, Rover 1 and Rover 2 head into No Persons Land.
Back on Earth, Erin desperately tries to find a signal, lest she becomes a member of the new Manson family… or worse, a plus one for the new Dahmer Party… but she catches some wave of a signal. Both her father and her ‘friend’ Duncan are indisposed, arrested, next to each other.
Meanwhile, on the moon, as the Space Force teams and the Chinese teams cross paths to whom would capture the castle, and as the Chiefs of Staff observe in real-time, as the Space Force… does its space jam… though there is a chink in the armor.
Though Dr. Mallory, febrile in his wanting for an Instagram for science with Fuck Tony to set himself on fire isn’t doing it. It was a last-ditch effort for something that was already launched in place.
Out of her place though is an errant Erin, who is struggling to contact her mother from jail because her father is engaged in international-warfare. That’s a lot to put a daughter in the middle of, right? Especially when she’s fearing for her life. When her mother Maggie (Lisa Kudrow) trustingly places her daughter’s plight in her own hands, she only has one thing to do… take one of the fucking bikes at her disposal and pedal the fuck away!
Now with Mark free from a lighter in Adrian’s pocket and Erin’s thighs, pumping pure gasoline to get up to the sanctuary… Why would the equally fueled BMX bikes were hot on her tail?
It matters known because, like an angel from above, her father’s chopper cuts them off, leaving Mark- markedly declared, her Hero. By her own admission.
Back on where things are more bouncy, the entire Space Force team descends on the Chinese Base… and also according to those on Earth, Erin spots her mother. As shit would have it, she escaped saving her daughter and in a beautiful twist of fate, the three are a family again. You know, among certain circumstances with Louise, her escapee (maybe a nod to Dannemora)?
To Mark, it truly matters none, for as rocky as his family may be, the foundation bears no cracks.
As the Rovers see another Chinese vehicle pass by them with what they think of are sarcastic waves, Captain Ali makes the executive call to send a fake report to Grabaston of the ruination of the opposition’s, let’s be honest, what amounts to a Space Tent. Her lie extends to receiving those breathing as refugees.
The only thing is, a good heart may have some weight on Earth but on the Moon, it means fucking zilch.
Their base was destroyed, completely obliterated. Can we say an act of war now? Finally!?
While still in the air, Mark’s tertiary in command, his awesomely well-meaning but never landing assistant, Brad Gregory (Don Lake) informs him that the mission is completely fubar and that he might be court marshaled. Why do I say while still in the air? Because they reverse course to another bit of soil, free from extradition, I would imagine.
Now this season most definitely had its ups and its downs and for better or worse, it was an OK starter. To be honest, I would have expected more awkward from Greg Daniels (The Office) and more absurdist from Steve Carell (Angie Tribeca), and at times, they succeed. The rub is, they tried to pack a ton of information into 10 episodes, and some hit more than the others.
The standouts from this season for me were John Malkovich (of course) playing an intellectual casually becoming unraveled with each obstacle and stumbling block before him, Tawny Newsome, whose understated character making her way through rank and file with poise won my heart, and of course, Diana Silvers.
Now, hear me out. Ben Schwartz was amazing and I still love him, but Diana Silvers had a frustration exemplified that one can’t simply shrug off with a simple “DIANA SHRUGS” type action. She made it hers and was honestly one of the more interesting parts of the series, despite having so little on the script.
Overall, though not a work of art, I think we all see where this was going. It was a comedic treatise on our soon to be released Commander in Chief and though he may be nuts… the idea actually isn’t so much. While I am by no means saying militarize the moon, as it’s uncharted territory and that would be just fucking dickish, I do think celestial exploration is on our horizon and coming at us with light speed energy.
With that being said, I think the series may have a prescience to what could happen if too much may transpire in too little time without the guidance of cooler heads prevailing.
This series taught me one thing, if not for anything else. Ralph Kramdon used to threaten his wife Alice with a kisser up to the Moon.
Let’s just hope that this kiss within the heavens is with our wits, not our fists.
In the season two finale of The Mandalorian, the stakes are high on this rollercoaster of emotion.
Warning: You must grant yourself permission to keep reading the spoilers
So many feelings. It took me a while to write this article. Usually, I give you a recap of the episode (shoutout to Peyton Reed for an amazing job directing this week) with my thoughts attached to it, but this time I want to do things differently. Make sure to check out our podcast above for a detailed discussion!
This show is one of my favorites, and it’s no secret I’m super obsessed. Din (Pedro Pascal) is great character to follow on the “Lone Wolf” journey, and Grogu is a gift to the world. On Friday, we got a conclusion to a two season journey.
I swear I thought I had it figured out. I thought the Child would stay with Mando, but I was wrong. Dead wrong. I still haven’t recovered from it.
It’s easy to want something and expect to get it. It’s harder to want something and get what you needed instead. I was selfish watching this show, and this is where Mando was a better man than I was. I’ve made it clear how much I love Pedro Pascal in this show, and he keeps proving me right.
The whole episode was a wild ride to go save the kid. Fighting a whole cruiser, with a badass group of ragtag fighters. The women assault team kicked so much ass as they mixed a great combo of trooper ground strategy with Mandalorian-based support. It was amazing to watch. Then, we get the most tense moment of the show: Mando finding Grogu held hostage by Moff Gideon (Giancarlo Esposito). An intense battle ensues, but we know that Mando will give it all for the Child and eventually succeeds.
Sure, we get the whole storyline about the Darksaber, and that will have its own conclusion. But it doesn’t matter. Just when we think the group of heroes are defeated with the Dark Troopers banging down their door, we get the answer to who heard Grogu’s call on Tython: Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamil) This proceeds to gives us a kickass scene of the Jedi clearing the threat and getting to the heroes. A lot of people were complaining about the de-aging technology implemented, but, honestly, I think it’s an overreaction and nitpicking. Remember: hate leads to anger, and anger leads to toxic Star Wars fans.
The moment then comes: will Grogu go with Luke?
I was sitting there, confidently expecting, hoping, wishing, Grogu would deny Luke and stay with Papa Mando. But then, he didn’t.
Mando felt it, he didn’t want to let him go. Luke tells him that Grogu wants Din’s permission to go with the Jedi, and my heart fucking breaks.
Din was a better man than me. He knew for two seasons that he would have to part ways with Grogu. But, it wasn’t just delivering the Child, it was giving away his heart. Grogu has made Din a better man and helped him grow. This isn’t the same Mando we met in “Chapter 1;” this is a man that is more than the helmet and armor he wears.
The moment comes, and he readies Grogu to go. The Child looks at Daddo one more time and goes to touch his helmet. Din decides to take off his helmet and let the little man touch his face.
Ugh, my heart man. I was crying so much. This is why I love entertainment. When a story is masterly crafted and beautifully told, it makes me feel emotions and get lost in the world. Seeing Grogu walk to Luke and be carried away, I was yelling at the screen for him to come back. The emotion on Din’s face said it all. This little kid he cared for and loved was moving on, and this is the lesson we learn.
Love is not a conditional thing; truly loving someone is letting them grow and doing what’s best for them. Sometimes, that means they leave your lives. Grogu needed to learn how to hone his skills or else he would lose them. The Force is a big part of him, and, with Luke, he can meet his true potential. Having him stay with Din would have been great. I would have loved it, but it’s not what Grogu wanted. It hurt him just as much as it hurt Din and us.
But this story has come to its end, and I have to be okay with it. Though I’m not fully okay, I’m becoming okay. Din finished his mission, and Grogu got what he wanted. We are left to pick up the pieces but so is life.
If you love a flower, you do not pick it. You water it and let it be. If you love a Grogu, you left him live his best life.
I love this show, and, even though there will be other shows to watch, these two seasons have found a permanent home in my heart.
Thank you to Jon Favreau, Lucasfilm, Disney+, the wonderful cast, the talented crew, and the dedicated writers that made this a beautiful experience.
With that’s gone down this shitty year, we arrive on our of what constitutionally makes fun of what’s wrong with a commander in chief of his own fiefdom.
“My God, it’s full of stars.” “Ground control to Major Tom.” “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”
All great quotes when venturing into the deep, vacuum of the unknown drenched in darkness punctuated with light and some of the trippiest things you could see with the help of telescopes five generations of your family couldn’t even afford to pay off begin with your first few lines that are beamed to us plebians on Earth, a planet that literally means “dirt.” It’s the experience at a ratio lower than being elected the Pope or a Czar, becoming a King or a Conqueror can you become an astronaut.
In this penultimate episode of Space Force (Netflix) titled “It’s Good To Be Back On The Moon”, we can see why one slip up can lead to a universe of possibilities.
Captain Angela Ali (Tawny Newsome) has worked hard through rank and file from the first episode through now to become the first woman on the moon. You know, along with Maintenance Man Eddie Broser (Chris Gethard), Maintenance Woman Phella Bhat (Aparna Nancherla), cadets and gadflies in training Julio-Diaz Jose (Hector Duran) and Obie Hanrahan (Owen Daniels) spearheaded by General Mark Naird (Steve Carell) and Dr. Adrian Mallory (John Malkovich).
The shocker is? Most of them are not qualified astronauts, as queried by a journalist at their pre-launch press conference… To which I say… physician, heal-thy-fucking-self!
Whether this motley soon to be remotely crew gird their loins of what it takes to be one of the rarified few that can experience a life-shattering experience of seeing their species base from afar theirs’ is neither here nor there! In fact, it’s none of nobody’s fucking business.
As Fuck Tony (Ben Schwartz) deftly deflects queries of the journalists at hand, Adrian is sweating. Why would they put a cadre of inexperienced grunts on a historic mission to the Moon? I’ll tell ya why- because Mark is the rock that proves to be the counterweight to Dr. Mallory.
As they prepare for lift-off, both Eddie and Phella want off of the journey before it even commences. General Naird quashes their butterflies by prompting a go for launch and with the flare of the ship, the increasing from 1.7 to 2g’s and with the tranquil separation of the rocket boosters, the crew of Space Force has successfully exited Earth’s orbit and is Lunar bound. Now it’s 36 hours and counting until arrival.
Congratulations float about the base and morale is rides high, but the only objective Mark has his eyes locked on at the moment is Kelly King (Jessica St. Clair), and the one thing the unflappable rock balked at- asking her out. Through a string of awkward and stilted confirmations and admissions, it’s a date!
Going for a literal victory lap around the base, Mark runs across (it was right there) his daughter Erin (Diana Silvers), also taking a jog. Before they can take full advantage with a bit of daily exercise, Mark’s assistant Brad Gregory (Don Lake) buzzes Mark with a snag about the Chinese. So much for going off without a hitch!
According to Dr. Chan Kaifang (Jimmy O. Yang), the Chinese declared the Sea of Tranquility crater as a territory of scientific research. Since an edict of the Outer Space Treaty states that nobody can own part of the moon, they are circumventing it by only “wanting to study it.” Though Mark seems fine with changing the course, Ranatunga (Punam Patel), says anything altering that would be altering the mission. Adrian agrees and figures the only way in is through, which means establishing direct communication with China’s research center.
So Adrian ingratiates himself in the presence of Dr. Zhang (Richard Ouyang) as well as his team. Dr. Zhang just puts it plainly out there that they are the first to live on the moon. Though Adrian tries to remind his foreign colleague about the Apollo missions, Dr. Zhang claims falsehoods. Though Adrian’s been diplomatic, Dr. Zhang in so many words tells them not to land on the Crater and tells them to bugger off before signing off.
Adrian and Mark have their work cut out for them and because one good thing leads to another, the news had just reported that crew member Eddie is technically a convicted felon, having been accused of starting a county and state park brush fire. Tony blames Brad, but technically that’s all F. Tony’s deal and he certainly gets a steaming earful from Mark.
This leaves Fuck Tony with contacting the entire crew, forcing them to spill the beans on the skeletons in their closet. From Obie’s grandfather being an IRA member to accidental blackface to public masturbation, Tony is having his chickies come home to roost.
Meanwhile, Mark is having his feet held to the fire by Secretary of Defense John Blandsmith (Dan Bakkedahl) on this international conundrum. Either appear weak by kowtowing to the Chinese or stay the course and risk escalating tensions. He offers no sound advice, so Mark goes to a pacing Adrian. He is freaking out. All that stress can make a guy hungry for a meal, right?
At dinner, though Kelly informs Mark that she’s fine with dating, Mark informs Kelly that he’s reticent about informing his daughter about their arrangement.
As they exchange understandings over steak and wine over a poignant degree, poor Adrian exchanges phantom barbs with Dr. Zhang over a bottle of whiskey to a hilarious degree.
Meanwhile, as Chan tries to figure out their next move in mission control, Angela appears before him on the big screen. He switches her to private chat at her request. She tries to workshop her first line when she sets foot on a thing most of the world may not experience in most of human history up until this point. She pitches out “It’s good to be back on the moon.” Chan thinks it’s terrible for the sheer disconnect in logic. Chan’s isn’t better, as he’s going for science and it reads as sexist.
The thing is Angela wants something powerful because she’s worked her whole life for this and she wants to make an impact that’s as impact full on her as her footstep in space. Chan agrees with her first pitch. This was a surely tender moment between the two.
The morning after at the Naird house, Mark tries to broach to Erin the concept of dating another, but before his daughter can puke at the idea, Mark’s guts were spilled, as Kelly walks down to greet them. Now that the air is cleared, Erin clears of the air, leaving in disgust.
Back at the old grind, Adrian confronts Mark diplomacy with having rather uncharacteristic vim in his vigor. Either someone pissed in Dr. Mallory’s cereal or a hangover for a genius is a baptism. Either way, the roles are reversed and sometimes in couples, the dynamic has to change for the better.
Speaking of which, as Erin visits her mother Maggie (Lisa Kudrow), and her mind is blown. Her parents are seeing other people. Now is the time for smoothing things out or blowing them up (as Adrian did actually mention.)
On the call with General Tesngjun (Bruce Locke), General Naird does the exact same thing as Dr. Mallory. Though “you laid down like a hooker on quaaludes” is one of the best lines I’ve heard of defeat in a long time. Mark’s deductive skills lead him and Adrian to realize that China wants to drill the Moon, not explore it. This would mean something nefarious and whilst Mark and Adrian argue in mission control, the only control outside of that room is really his daughter.
The Sea of Tranquility is a go as a command by Mark. This is the mission of their home. Space Force One has landed. Mark grants Captain Angela Ali the first one to stretch her legs. She’s earned it.
Staring out that Lunar landscape, she takes her first steps, like a baby. “It’s good to be black on the moon.”
Though it is an initial shock, cosmic coincidence is a term.
Adrian and both Mark can’t believe they did something only people dream of. Their warm handshake is akin to the warmest hug you can ever feel. What ensues is like a wonderful bounce house vicariously through all that will never get to experience it, backed by the beautiful Bobby Womack’s version of “Fly Me To The Moon”. It’s glorious for the underdogs, the ones that made it, and the outcasts.
For those, you always have the bullies, though, and the Chinese space vehicle just knocks over their space flag like a slow-rolling rap star with an intent to beef.
The celebration can’t see it, but Mark and Adrian can see it and they DARE them to raise it. Not that flag, but rather the game.
Because when I think of Christmas, I naturally think about a steaming pile of Mario Lopez’s Fried Chicken
For a film directed by some random person named Jean (because the titles omit their last name), a Recipe For Seduction is quite frankly, a recipe for disaster. A Lifetime Christmas-time Fried Chicken romance movie starring Mario Lopez as Colonel Harlan Sanders, I’m not entirely certain who this movie is for, and frankly, I don’t really care. Because it’s funny enough as an extended KFC commercial and even funnier with just how well it works as a Lifetime movie. One that hits the Lifetime formula oddly spot on. With a short 15 minutes of pure blissful ridiculousness, A Recipe For Seduction is a surprising story about seduction, overcoming adversity, and the colonel’s famous fried chicken recipe.
Fair warning, this is a KFC sponsored film. So the opening scenes, naturally, feature an unnecessary long table dinner party equipped with silverware and desperate actors, all smiling to desperately to be seen next to the fried chicken panoramic shots. And even though not a single actor actually eats any of the KFC, I do believe this kind of spectacle would make Donald Trump proud, as it’s a dinner party filled with fast food and loads of uncomfortable people pretending to enjoy being there.
It’s here at this moment, where we learn about the evil millionaire Billy, along with and his reluctant to marry partner, Jessica. An heiress (played by Justine Alpert) looking for love and finding it in the new chef, Harlan Sanders. A man who cannot be bought with money and who’d like to earn his wealth his way: by becoming famous for his fried chicken secret recipe. It is a story about wealth, integrity, romance, and fried chicken. For a lifetime drama, you can do worse.
Overall, this movie is a fun way to waste 15 minutes if you like laughing at excessive corporate themed entertainment ventures as much as I do. Probably the biggest plot hole of this movie, beyond why it even exists in the first place, is where the conflict actually lies within the story. Because for all this conniving and talk about marriage for love, I’m not 100% certain why Jessica can’t marry Harlan in the first place? As apparently mom was more than down to get dirty with Billy and compose some bizarrely nefarious scheme to marry her daughter despite being in a romance with her hopeful son-in-law.
In the Mandalorian’s seventh episode of season two, the crew is reunited with a familiar face, as the objective is clear: find the ship, find the Child.
Warning: Finding Moff Gideon’s Starcruiser coordinates will reveal spoilers.
One step closer to getting our baby back. This is the way in the Mandalorian. Grogu, we love you and you mean the galaxy to us. Let’s set the scene for “Chapter 15: The Believer.”
We start in a New Republic prison camp, where Migs Mayfeld (Bill Burr) is serving his sentence. Cara Dune (Gina Carano), now a New Republic Marshal, comes to the camp and orders a prisoner transfer to get him away. Once away from the roboguard, Mayfeld is abruptly introduced to Boba Fett (Temuera Morrison), Fennec Shand (Ming-Na Wen), and reunited with his old enemy, the Mandalorian (Pedro Pascal). He is proposed the plan to track Moff Gideon’s ship, which Mayfeld reluctantly complies with (in exchange for a better prison set-up). He tells the Grogu Reconnaissance Squad that he would need to use an internal Imperial terminal and their best bet is to go to a nearby hidden Imperial rhydonium refinery on Morak.
On Morak, they have to devise a plan. Because of a facial recognition component to the terminal and security clearance, a lot of the group are not able to go, due to being known (for bad reasons) to Imperial security. It’s difficult to figure out how to go about it. To avoid Mayfeld going in solo, the Mandalorian elects to accompany Mayfeld into the refinery to steal the ship’s coordinates.
The first part of the plan is to hijack an Imperial transport, carrying highly explosive rhydonium, which they do. Mando and Mayfeld don the soldier uniform to disguise themselves, which is a big deal for the Mandalorian. What I really love about this episode is just how we’ve seen Mando grow as an individual, and a big part of this is due to his love for Grogu. The Mando from Chapter 1 would never take off his mask for anything that wasn’t in private, but now he is switching helmets and taking a risk. The writing, combined with Pascal’s acting chops, really delivers on a subtle level with the Mandalorian character.
Once they get into the transport and start moving, we start to get a view into Morak and the life of the inhabitants of Morak. The planet provides a beautiful landscape with lushious forests and mountains. The natives are a different story: they leave in small sheds and huts and are clearly poor. Mayfeld gives a monologue on how the poor don’t care who is ruling, whether it’s the Empire or the New Republic. The people are surviving, in spite of the ruling body. It’s a cool insight into Mayfeld’s mind and gives a nice, gray, realistic view of the Star Wars universe.
The one-way discussion is interrupted when other transports are blown up. The reason is made clear when they end up being chased by native pirates. Mando goes to fight off the pirates while Mayfeld steers the ship safely, not to overheat the vehicle. This gives us a great action sequence because Mando doesn’t have his weapons or gadgets. He has to fight off at least a dozen pirates with hand-to-hand combat. It’s a great reinforcement of his proficiency as a fighter. The scene is tense and balances a continuous battle scene with the intensity of a Speed vehicle chance. They are getting close to the bridge leading to the refinery, and it seems like it’s hopeless for Mando to fight off everyone. Suddenly, two TIE fighters come and blow up the pirates, giving Mando and Mayfeld safe passage to the refinery, with the aid of some Stormtrooper suppression fire. They reach the facility and are greeted with adulation and respect for being the only surviving shipment. It’s a really surreal moment, craftly executed by the writers and production team. Getting a sense of relief from TIE fighter aid and seeing an Imperial celebration that we connect to is confusing and uncomfortable. This show really does a spectacular job of towing the line between “good and evil.”
Once inside, the two look for a terminal for Mayfeld to use, and the closest one is in the officer’s mess hall. Mayfeld proceeds to it but recognizes one of the officers eating. It was his former commanding officer, Valin Hess, and this revelation spooks him to the point that he wants to abort the mission. Mando knows they can’t stop now because the Child means everything to him. The solution is clear: he will take the data stick and go in himself.
Mando goes in with his helmet on, but the terminal requires a facial scan. It starts to countdown to what seems like a security alarm, which is a bit strange to be honest with you. The alarm catches the attention of Hess and the other officers, leaving Mando no choice but to remove his helmet to acquire the codes. This is the first time we see Din without his helmet surrounded by other humans. It’s an impactful moment because it goes against everything he believed, but Grogu is more important to him than his former creed.
The data copy is complete and coordinates are retrieved! But, this isn’t the end. Hess approaches Din to figure out who he is. Din is scrambling to make up a lie and nearly is found out until Mayfeld intervenes. Mayfeld fast talks to cover their asses, which includes saying that Din’s name is Brown Eyes (a nickname given by the other troops). But they can’t leave just yet. Hess finds out they were the troopers that safely delivered the transport and invites them to a drink.
Cara and Fennec set up their positions and wait for the evacuation plan, which is taking longer than expected.
Now, we sit with them for an awkward drink. It’s almost as Quentin Tarantino directed this scene. Mayfeld is seated on one end, Hess on another, and good ol’ Brown Eyes in the middle. A drink in all their hands and a conversation just sitting on a ticking time bomb. I love it.
Hess keeps asking Din questions, while Mayfeld diverts the convo to help their cover. This leads to him bringing up Operation: Cinder: a mission Mayfeld was a part of that saw 5,000 to 10,000 Imperial troops die, in addition to the destruction of the city Burnin Konn and its civilians, due to Hess’ decisions. Hess plays off the military decision as nothing significant and that the dead were happy to support the Empire, which Mayfeld greatly disagrees with, questioning who really benefited from it. The scene is so intense, and Bill Burr does a phenomenal job hitting the emotional levels as a jaded veteran. It was fascinating to watch. This leads up to a moment where Hess states that he believes no one wants freedom, only order. It’s sinister and leads to an angry Mayfeld shooting him.
Well, that went well. Now it’s time for Mayfeld and Mando (who has his trooper helmet back on) to fight their way out of danger by making their way to the roof. Luckily for them, Fennec and Dune are at attention and sniping down the pursuing troopers and clearing a path on the roof. Mando and Mayfeld make it to the top, where Slave 1 flies in with just enough time for the two to jump off the roof and onto the ship’s opening. As they are flying away, Mayfeld asks for a rifle and snips the remaining rhydonium shipment, destroying the refinery. They aren’t out of the clear just yet, though. The two Tie Fighters from before return, giving Boba a shot to evade with some fancy flying and drop a seismic charge on the enemies.
Success!!
The mission is complete. As they all regroup, Mayfeld readies himself to be back in custody, until Dune decides to look the other way and free Mayfeld, saying “he died in the refinery explosion.” Mayfeld goes off to freedom, and the rest of the crew make their next move.
We end on the Starcruiser of Moff Gideon (Giancarlo Esposito) who gets a message from one of his officers. It’s a transmission from our body, the Mandalorian. Mando calls out Gideon, telling him the boy is his and he will do anything to get him back.
Wow, what a dope episode. Directed and written by Rick Famuyiwa, the episode delivers on providing tension, action, character growth and progression and the right amount of build up for the finale.
OOOOOOOH BABBY. The showdown is coming next week, and I am PUMPED!
Ever imagined if Chuck Jones and Tex Avery murdered Walt Disney and created their own playground?
First of all, I wanted to pay respects to George Lopez, Gregory Grandchamps, and George Larsson Jr.
What a way to start off a piece, right?
Growing up in NJ, there was the ocean. It is still majestic, with its azure waters and seaside culture. I remember childhood memories of going to Long Beach Island, frequenting the Boardwalk, playing games, going on rides, and then going for a dip in the Atlantic (there’s still the requisite badge for that.)
New Jersey never changed and as much shit is sprayed in its face from other states, it still remains one of the most unique and majestic places I’ve been. It’s because we as residents have the same thick skin and derring-do attitude- as our Garden State should be proud of.
There is a frequency to how much I travel and Jersey is always on the map in my heart. Whether for bad or good, people are fascinated with what some of us call home. From pizza to attitude, we never disappoint and are always on point.
There are many things I’m proud of from this oft looked over the piece of the United States, but one stands out. No, it’s not one of us existing in the 13 Colonies. I accept us having truly haunted places, but I reject your thinking that we’re just the sister of NYC (by the way, the Statue of Liberty is ours! Kick fucking rocks!)
It’s that we’ve tried to outdo the traditional and we did… at a legendary cost. It was called Action Park. It was revolutionary, but it was dangerous, but as the “armpit of America” as you other states scoff at it and call it, we had one-upped you, PUSSIES!
The documentary of Class Action Park (HBO Max) was a true citing of what you may all wanted in a Disney Park, but could NEVER HAVE, being like a Westworld of sorts. It was a Willy Wonka level of fun…there’s always one catch though… like the movie.
What you want as a kid or as a youth may have consequences and some bandages can’t even begin to staunch the blood flow.
ALPINE CENTER.
Eugine Mulvihill in Vernon Valley/Great Gorge ski resort wanted something for families and the kids (gotta do it for the kids) in the summertime and what better way to expand your successful business in the summertime? Right? The time of fireflies and swimming had him add an Alpine slide, which was a concrete luge that the basic kid or adult could measure their own speed. Sounds perfect? Well, it was!
The Alpine slide was like a huge ride without the snow that you could control… Think toboggans, but in summer. You were the victor if completing it but the bigger victor if you broke a bone on a combo of concrete, fiberglass, and asbestos, with the chairlift riding above you and spitting on you while spitting insult.
Your reward from injury would be a spray that would be a concoction that would make the successful want to die… and one did after sliding off and banking his head on a rock. George Larsson Jr. had died of his injuries of being in a coma, but the park blamed it as him as a teen employee that should have known the risks. NOT ACCEPTABLE. In fact, flagrant!
There was also a skateboard park that had not been designed well and reported many injuries. They just kind of went wild with this, which was completely negligent.
MOTOR WORLD.
There was the Super Go-Karts. That sounds fun, right? This was unfettered around the track which could go 20 mph, however, the park employees could hack the governors devices that would restrict the speed limit with tennis balls, so they could go up to 50mph, frequently going into bumper car mode being dicks and causing head injuries. Notwithstanding, they would take the beer into the brewery that they would set up in-park, and drive drunk onto the overlapping freeway on Route 94.
The Lola cars section would not be any different, as they used the same hack and do the same.
However, the coolest concept to me was the battle tanks option. Encumbered in a chainlink fence, one could enter something that looked like a tank and shoot tennis balls at your opponent’s sensor. If you hit their target, they were down for 15 seconds or on the outside people could shoot cannons to do the same. Sounds innocent enough, but we’re are talking about teenagers, so those entering a tank could be pelting or, in the instance of a few people knowing mayhem, you could soak tennis balls in gasoline and launch flaming grenades at your enemy or basically any unsuspecting victim.
Water existed too, in this realm of anarchy and drunken madness. First, there were the super speed boats based in a pond. In New Jersey, we know the ocean, we know the bay for such things… a pond makes not for them. Nevertheless, things that would go the speed of cigarette boats did harm. In the documentary, one trying to dock went over another one, trapping another rider.
Imagine going to an amusement park and being trapped under an actual speedboat by the end of your day. No? Me either.
The bumper boats were supposed to alleviate that problem, but one leak leads to another, as the lack of overseeing from teenage kids led to frequent leaks of gasoline. This park was made for kids and young adults… but isn’t the happiest place on earth.
WATERWORLD.
I leave the last for the most notorious. This was something that should have had no existence. Mulvill wanted to create something nobody had created before, but the negligence was not opaque. Most people knew things like this, though super exciting should have never been in the hands of someone that wanted to do the opposite of Disney.
I believe Sesame Place did it better. Jim Henson wanted an anti-Disney park in that the fun came from your body achieving it. How fun is it completing a walk up a rope climb as a kid? How fun would it have been to experience (which Disney did) a white water rafting experience? Nope, defenestrate. Bill Mulvihill wanted to create a natural experience.
Though our land is beautiful, there is creating something upon the beautiful land we have and creating something from it. I liked where his head was at, but I hate that he wrote off on most of this.
That being said, we’ll go one some of the more ‘pedestrian rides’ now.
There was the Aqua Skoot that basically was on your on a water slide as a skipping rock. This you apparently had to be a pro at or you would end up with a bloody nose or smashing. If you could do it, like most things, you could brag to your friends about it.
There was the Roaring Rapids (think Disney) but in a possible four-person fitted raft down our great state’s actual rapids. This made for jagged rocks and broken bones. It was supposed to replicate a level 4.5 ride, which is actually tough for the experienced.
There was the tamer Kayak Experience, meant to mimic rolling water with underwater tides electrically until someone capsized and was electrocuted to death with a miswiring.
However, now we come to the two most dangerous places in the park: the Tarzan Swing and the Tidal Wave Pool.
Now a Tarzan swing is infamous but for good reason. I’ve never done one, but the concept is simple- fucking swing into a pool! Seems easy enough, right? The Tarzan swing is infamous for being the test of Action Park. According to patrons, it never looked that bad, but going off a deep enough swinging was contingent on your body weight, your mettle, and your skill.
Most failed, just dropped into the water like a released fish. However, if you were the stuff of legend, you’d expose yourself or do a flip or do both. I’m sure alcohol helped. The thing with the attraction itself is it was a natural pond, which meant it wasn’t water controlled.
Most would be shocked, even during the summer at its cold nature, and one person died of a heart attack at the shock of it. It’s not for the faint of heart, but most people didn’t know that. It was a test of mettle to you as a person, but at what cost?
Still, it was a mainstay. Girls would pull up their tops, guys would show their cocks before jumping it. Good old fashioned chicanery… but it’s not good.
The Tidal Wave Pool I’m only putting second because the last encapsulates how Action Park worked.
In any event, we’re all familiar with the tidal pools. We’ve seen them on cruises (which actually work better) and we’ve seen them in parks. Their sole intent is to mimic an ocean. The thing is that having been to the ocean myriad times, they don’t mimic it like you want to.
They are febrile and dangerous, like heavy breaking waves. Low tides are a misnomer. You would think high tide? Nope. They are most active at low. Now, if controlled, a case for gaining lawsuits, they temper it. NOT WITH ACTION PARK. With their tide pool, they could house from 500-1,000 people.
Not only are there lifeguards possibly boozed up, but also are watching over a family of like 10 in the tide. I believe, in the documentary, one said at least an hour, if you didn’t save 30 people, you were not doing your job. This will come down to my final point. In fact, I believe someone said not even a professional swimmer could body that type of current. That includes three motherfucking drownings! Makes ya wonder why a thing like this existed at all.
This leaves me with their coup de grace, The Cannonball Loop.
Before I get on any an all screeds, this, if I were drunk enough would have gone on. This is also something that should never have existed, but it did for a time.
To give a little bit of backstory, this is a waterslide loop that was literally drawn up on a napkin that Bill should have never greenlit. It’s an abomination of all things that are holy and it may be a testament to why did was as much of a madman as it was.
The Cannonball Loop was a huge descent to what would amount to a small loop to shoot you out. Think of an Alphorn (those Ricola commercials) but with a smaller loop. That would chatter your teeth, wouldn’t it?
Well, no need to worry, because ostensibly so many people were breaking their noses and faces on that rocket descent, they created a teeth catcher at the top. I’m sure the tooth fairy would have even been casting aspersions on that asshole for doing something and making engineers create that.
In fact, he’d pay any willing teen 100 bones for just experimenting with it for free. They would get paid, but at what cost?
Epilogue.
The directors Seth Porges and Chris Charles Scott III do a bang-up (and I do mean that literally for all those that have endured the mayhem in person) job of showing the truth of what a maniacal and magical idea can spark into a forest fire.
This was a park that wanted teens to rule their own when society said otherwise. That was a beautiful mistake. The creator was a person involved with naught but getting asses in his seats of the park at no expense. He had overseas investments to funnel money. This was a person that thought he had nothing to lose. Through various business holding being an Investor/Innovator, in what he thought was the next level, in a way, he was. He was on the right track but in the wrong car… going too fast, tennis ball shoved into the tail pipe.
That being said, this is a park I think that should have never existed, but in some ways, I’m glad that it did. I had a wanton display to go there if I could growing up, but my mother knew better. This documentary had Alice In Chains at it and they had a great time. I personally think with the employ of the actual ride designers could have been a beautiful thing that would have lasted. The rub is they made it a once in a lifetime experience that can never (hopefully NEVER) be replicated. It was at the vanguard and in the zeitgeist of the 80s and 90s.
The accounts of actors, creators, workers, designers, and fans alike cannot hold a candle to what it was truly like. Shout outs to John Hodgman for narrating this lovely nightmarish trip through fun as well as comedians Chris Gethard and Alison Becker.
My whole ethos is to make a change in the world, leave it better than you found it. This made their whole worlds both better and worse. We cannot call it even, because the blood of both the living and the deceased are on their hands.
This was if Satan had clay to play with and sculpt a park for those willing to LIVE LIFE and those unfortunate to die for that same thing.
Netflix’s upcoming series Bridgerton is based on the Bridgerton series of novels by author Julia Quinn and follows the lives of an affluent high society family as they navigate their way through Regency London to find love and happiness. With eight books (one focusing on each sibling), the show looks to be first focusing on The Duke and I, which tells the story of eldest daughter Daphne Bridgerton and Simon Basset, the Duke of Hastings.
Here are the notable characters you need to know before the show’s debut on December 25.
The Bridgerton Family
Anthony Bridgerton (Jonathan Bailey) – Anthony is a viscount, head of the family and is the eldest born of Violet and Edmund Bridgerton. He loves his family dearly and is fiercely protective of all of his siblings. His story is explored in The Viscount Who Loved Me.
Benedict Bridgerton (Luke Thompson) – is second eldest and the artist of the family. Benedict though yearns to lean more into his artistic ambitions and to expand his life past the endless parties of the Ton. His tale is in An Offer From a Gentleman.
Colin Bridgerton (Luke Newton) – is the third eldest and the sibling with the most wanderlust. Colin is charming and mischievous but is looking to make his own mark in the world. We discover his story in Romancing Mr. Bridgerton. He is closest to his sister Daphne who is nearest to him in age.
Daphne Bridgerton (Phoebe Dynevor) – the eldest daughter of Violet and Edmund Bridgerton, Daphne is a sensible young woman who has often been overlooked by the suitable gentlemen in London because most view her as a friend rather than a potential match. That is until the Duke of Hastings shows up and they form an unexpected arrangement.
Eloise Bridgerton (Claudia Jessie) – the second eldest daughter in the Bridgerton family, Eloise is cunning, smart, and a bit rebellious. Not your average debutante, she isn’t afraid to make bold choices. Her story is told in To Sir Philip, With Love. In addition, Eloise’s best friend is Penelope Featherington.
Francesca Bridgerton (Ruby Stokes) – the third daughter in the family, Francesca is quieter and more reserved than her other siblings but just as loyal and devoted to her loved ones. Her tale is captured in When He Was Wicked and is one of the darker books in Quinn’s series.
Gregory Bridgerton (Wil Tilston) – the youngest Bridgerton son, he’s a cheeky one who loves to vex his youngest sister Hyacinth. Gregory’s story is On The Way To The Wedding.
Hyacinth Bridgerton (Florence Hunt) – the youngest of all Bridgerton siblings, Hyacinth precocious, outspoken, and smart. Her story is told in It’s In His Kiss.
Violet Bridgerton (Ruth Gemmell) – the dowager Viscountess and matriarch of the family. A very loving mother though she’s determined to have all her children eventually married and taken cared of.
Other Important Characters
Simon Basset (Rege-Jean Page) – the male lead in The Duke and I, Simon is the newly installed Duke of Hastings after his father passes away while he was out of the country. This self-exile though was on purpose as he was estranged from the former duke. Hastings is determined never to marry or have children but upon meeting Daphne Bridgerton, the sister of his best friend Anthony, his will is tested.
Lady Whistledown (voiced by Julie Andrews) – the mysterious author is London’s ultimate authority for gossip, but no one knows her identity, though there are plenty of theories. Even her royal majesty Queen Charlotte is a reader!
Penelope Featherington (Nicola Coughlan) – is the youngest daughter of Lord and Lady Featherington and best friend to Eloise Bridgerton. Her two older sisters are Prudence and Philippa. She’s often disregarded by other members of the Ton but is kind, caring, and quite intelligent. She’s also harboring a secret love for a Bridgerton brother.
Lady Danbury (Adjoa Andoh) – a grand dame of London high society, Lady Danbury is incredibly outspoken and notorious for her cutting remarks. But beneath the exterior lies a kind and soft heart.
Queen Charlotte (Golda Rosheuvel) – a royal and avid reader of Lady Whistledown’s Society Papers, the queen ends up having to take matters into her own hands when the gossip columnist sets her eyes on palace affairs.
Cressida Cowper (Jessica Madsen) – a self-centered and mean-spirited debutante who wanted to be declared the season’s Incomparable.
A Few Things To Know About Regency London
If this is your first exposure to Regency romances here are a few key terms and concepts that will help explain the world of the Bridgerton family.
The (Haute) Ton
A term commonly used for members of the fashionable elite and high society in Regency London. It is derived from the French word le bon ton meaning good manners or good form.
British Peerage Ranking (highest to lowest)
Aristocrats are often featured in Regency stories and it’s helpful to understand who outranks who as a part of etiquette.
Duke – highest ranked in hereditary peerage, his title relates to a place (ex: Duke of Cornwall)
Marquess – second highest, title usually also relates to a place (ex: Marquess of Bath)
Earl – third highest, title may be taken from a place or family name (ex: Earl Spencer)
Viscount – fourth ranked, the title may also be taken from a place, family name, or a combination (ex: Viscount Hereford). It is also often used a courtesy title for the heir of an earl or marquess.
Baron – lowest ranked, title is taken from a place or family name (ex: Baron Thomson of Fleet).
What is the London Season?
This is a period in time in which members of high society were situated in London (as opposed to being in their country estates) as parliament was in session for both the House of Lords and the House of Commons. Members of parliament brought their families with them and thus a large amount of the upper class were in town and require entertaining. This was also a time for young ladies to be launched into society by being presented at court. She then could find herself a husband amongst the gentlemen of the Ton. There would be many balls, dinner parties, plays, operas, and charity events to attend.
The London season usually began around late October to November and lasted till May or June.
Rakes and Dandies
A rake is a term used for men of the period who were immoral womanizers and not suitable husband material for any respectable young lady. However, a reformed one is often used as a trope for the lead male character in Regency novels.
A dandy is another term used for fashionable men of the time. They believed that everything done by a gentleman must be done so in style. Understated elegance and impeccability are the modes of dress, manners, and even furniture.
On The Shelf, Incomparable, and Bluestockings
Being “on the shelf” is a term used for women who were considered un-marriageable after reaching a certain age (heaven forbid!).
To be the incomparable of the season is a title yearned for by many young ladies as it signifies them as the most desirable match for their astounding beauty.
Women who had intellectual or literary inclinations were often considered bluestockings. This was typically viewed as a negative attribute (insert eye roll).
And there you have it! I hope getting to know the characters above and learning a little bit more about Regency London will help enhance the experience of watching the series. It’s exciting to finally get to see Julia Quinn’s world come to life on screen as she puts a decidedly feminist spin to her storytelling. Her heroines are strong, intelligent, and well-rounded characters who have both strengths and weaknesses. They want love and marriage on their own terms despite a strict society with expectations on how a young lady should act and behave.
Bridgerton has the potential for multiple seasons with eight books worth of material and here’s hoping that Netflix gives us loads more.
Merry Christmas! Get ready for all the terrible movies.
Ah, ‘tis the season for a slew of new, cheaply, and quickly produced Christmas movies that celebrate the holiday spirit as long as that includes finding the man (or woman) of your dreams.
Let’s begin with why these movies are just the fucking worst. 90% of them perpetuate the ugly stereotype that in order to feel complete, a woman needs a man. There are those few where the double standard opens up on the other side of the street and we’re treated to a man that needs a woman (or a man) to feel complete, but, mostly, it’s lonely single ladies. Oh wait, that’s right…that’s the “feminist” twist: These ladies are not lonely spinsters sitting at home mourning their lack of a love life; no, these women are modern working girls (NOT hookers, though that would be a interesting take on the genre, I know you can do it Lifetime), who have full schedules thanks to their busy careers. Whose friends and loved ones often lament their lack of a significant other for them. But, once they find the man they never seemed to notice before another trope of these movies kicks in: The choice!
Yes, will the woman who has worked so hard in her given field, who has disappointed loved ones, or eschewed holidays to get ahead in the rat race, sacrifice her career for the love of her life!? And, no, this is not an exaggeration. This is genuinely how this plot twist plays out in, again, probably 90% of these movies. The job title may change – she’s a marketing whiz, a decorating whiz, a design whiz, etc. – but no matter what the position she’s presented with an eerily similar conundrum as her predecessors: Will she go for the big promotion/move or finally, finally put her personal life first and be with the man of her dreams (that she just met about 90 mins ago)? Mind you this life changing choice doesn’t just hinge on the man. It usually works out that if she leaves her corporate life she’ll have a local opportunity in her field because she’s still a modern working woman!
For the other 10%, we have Charles Dickens to thank. There are a lot of variations on A Christmas Carol. You also get Christmas “magic” thrown in for good measure. And of course, we can’t forget about the Santa stories – wherein Santa is either looking for a lady love, or helping another person find their love, because…you know…Santa wants all the holidays. Fuck you, Cupid.
Probably the weirdest part about all of these movies is that they take place at Christmas and not, say, a holiday that’s actually dedicated to people falling in love. Seriously, how the fuck did this trend not become a Valentine’s Day thing??? My best guess is because Valentine’s Day isn’t some asshole holiday that eats up the entire month in which it exists not to mention several months before (Lifetime started this shit in October). My other guess is because Christmas tends to be a TV wasteland – a lot of shows have their Winter Finales in early Dec. and don’t come back until January – this leaves people with a dearth of programming. It is nice to be able to turn on one channel and not only get new movies, but a slew of old ones you may not have been able to catch the first time they aired.
Now, in case you think I only hate these movies because of their anti-feminist bend, I’d like to also circle back to the fact that they are, inherently, bad. The plots are ridiculous, insanely predictable, the acting is often one-take, which is a shame, and the romances are…well…stupid. “I love Christmas…oh, you love Christmas too!? We should definitely make a lifelong commitment to each other based on our shared love of this one holiday and our brief time spent together celebrating it”, yeah, that sounds…sound. Mind you, most romantic comedies have a love story that is ridiculous. Not that some of these tales don’t incorporate more reasonable romantic roots – you’ve got your childhood friends or exes reconnecting, which I find a much more believable bedrock for a possible future together.
So, given all these flaws, what is it about these movies that I love? Why, every year, do I dedicate the majority of my weekend hours to watching them? Well, for one thing, as I said earlier, they are on. Do you have any idea how boring weekend TV is? It’s mostly movies you’ve seen a thousand times replaying on other stations, or, if you’re like me, you’re catching up on TV you missed during the week because of work or school. Once you’re done with that, or tired of the reruns, what else is there? And, it’s cold out. Mind you, I love the cold so I have no problem bundling up and going for a walk or out to shop, but this year especially, staying indoors is a must. Which leaves me with my original problem: what to watch?
These Christmas movies are great because they are pretty much always on. They also don’t require any real attention, because they are so predictable, you can start one, go live your life, come back and watch the end without really missing much. The leads will always get together, trust me; the how and why of it isn’t of much import. It is a nice level of reliability. Be it Lifetime, ION, or Hallmark, just to name a few, you’ve got something seasonal to watch. That’s another part of it: seasonal. Christmas movies are not shy about being Christmas movies. For someone who does the bare minimum decorating wise, it’s nice to see whole towns decked out. Trees, Santa, reindeer, cookies, snow, you name it they’ve got it. Hell, even the warmer towns get love – Pheonix, L.A., Tennessee, the south is not lacking for holiday spirit. And that brings me to possibly my most important point: traditions and the breaking there of.
I’ve been watching these holiday schmaltz fests for a long time, and I’ve noticed a wonderful trend – modernization! A long time ago, these kinds of movies only took place with pretty white people in pretty white snow towns, but now? There have been a slew of holiday movies that feature a majority black cast, including the two leads, there are even some promises of more diversity – you’ve got an Asian couple this year, and even Latin/Hispanics are starting to fill the void (thanks Mario Lopez!). And race isn’t the only shakeup: this year drops the first romantic movie I’ve seen involving a disabled woman (Tony award winner Ali Stroker), and two gay couple centered movies (previously they were just featured in the background). Where are the lesbians? I have a theory about that.
I’m not saying it’s a fact, this is my opinion based on patterns I’ve noticed in shows but here it is. Because these movies are largely geared towards women, lesbians get the short end of the stick. Mind you, if these movies were geared towards men, I feel like lesbians would have already been a lead couple in one of these movies long ago. Here’s the thing: in many of the shows I’ve watched, if they are geared towards men, you’re more likely to see a lesbian love story. This is because, I believe, straight men are far more attracted to the idea of lesbians than straight women are. This isn’t because straight women have anything against lesbians, but I have noticed a particular predilection for gays (different strokes, right?).
There is a whole subset of straight women, who are turned on by the idea of gay men. Look at Supernatural (a show I’ve reviewed), it is not geared towards women but garnered a heavy female fan-base (hot leads? Yes, please) who wanted….ah, that’s right: gay love stories. This female fan-base did not ship Sam or Dean with any of the women who appeared on the show throughout its fifteen year run, it shipped Dean with Castiel (a male angel who became essentially the third lead) OR Sam and Dean together. That’s right. Rather than ship the boys with a lady, they chose incest. And let me quickly say that this isn’t the only example – there was an anime called Gundam Wing, which also had a lot of lady fans, and guess what their fan fiction centered around? That’s right: gay love stories, and that show had a female counterpart for each of its male leads, but most of the fanfiction didn’t focus on heterosexual pairings. It’s a thing, and I believe it’s the main reason Christmas movies are embracing gay love stories before lesbian ones…
But still, shaking up the traditional idea of who can 1. Love Christmas and 2. Have their love celebrated is being smashed and expanded to include a more widening cast of people every year, which is great. Even body types get some variation – my guess would be this is because of the quick turnaround schedule of these movies; they have to take who they can get without waiting for the perfect waif to fill the role. A lot of these women are not your typical Hollywood twig person. The men, however, do face the rare instance of objectification here. I have yet to see one of these movies without a perfect, fit, male lead. This is hilariously flipped from the Hollywood standard, where you have the insanely trim leading lady and the seemingly gym averse male lead (though I do see this more in TV shows than in movies, but the opposite is very rare in either case).
I do wish more holidays would get love. There was one Hanukkah movie last year, and there’s only one this year again, and both of their plots were just awful. Why not explore other cultures’ celebrations of the winter? If you’re willing to put other races and ethnicities in your movies why not take the extra step and show us how they celebrate, not just the usual Christmas trimmings. We get it, Christmas is great, but it’s not like these movies are heavily religious in their messages or presentations (for that I am HUGELY thankful) so it wouldn’t be blasphemous to move away from our typical holiday trappings to perhaps a more eclectic one.
I would also like to give special props to the Syfynetwork for their Christmas horror movies. Yes, Christmas, you feel the need to spit on Halloween’s grave before it’s even in the ground, why not shove a bit of Halloween into the Christmas season? It is truly the best example of a taste of your own medicine. Plus, let’s not forget, that the holidays aren’t exactly fun and romantic for most people. It’s a time of great stress, family conflict, high expectations, and sometimes crushing disappointment.
But, this year’s been a lot, and a visiting a magical land where everything works out just because the calendar changed to December isn’t the worst lie to tell ourselves. I think, at the end of the day, that’s what I love most about these movies. They are lies, yes, but they are best kind of lies. Imagine living in a world where everyone celebrates the spirit of the season, where everyone in a small town comes out for seasonal festivities, or everyone in a big city is a little kinder to each other just because Santa is watching. Then, the biggest lie of all: if you really want it, and you really open yourself up to it, you too can find true love. It’s the lie that all great romantic comedies tell us, only these add the outward expression of what the people are feeling. I mean, I know most people describe falling in love as fireworks, but couldn’t it also be similar to when the lights of a fully decked Christmas tree come on?
In season two episode six of The Mandalorian, our dynamic duo makes it to the ancient Jedi site where the course of their adventure is altered drastically.
Warning: Since you have chosen to read my article, I agree to warn you of the spoilers below.
Well, I was wrong with my prediction. What I thought would be the season finale ended up happening in “Chapter 14: Tragedy,” and it was one of the ages. I’m still not over it.
The Mandalorian (Pedro Pascal) and Grogu arrive to the planet of Tython, where they find the ancient Jedi temple on top of a mountain. The pass is tough to land on so Mando takes up the little one with his jetpack. Ugh, such a cute little scene.
Anyway, they get to the top, and Mando places Grogu on the seeing stone. After some hesitation, Grogu goes into a deep mediation that forms a Force tube around him, not letting anyone in and protecting the Child. Din is stuck there, not knowing what to do, until suddenly . . .
Slave I enters the planet’s atmosphere. Ooooooo snap! We know who’s coming, but Mando is on the alert. He wants to leave, but he can’t get to Grogu, you know, because of the Force tube. So, Din goes to investigate.
There, he comes face to face with the ex-bounty hunter, Boba Fett (Temuera Morrison)!. The two of them come to a stand-off, where we find out that Boba isn’t alone. He is flanked by Fennec Shand (Ming-Na Wen), the bounty hunter from Mando’s trip to Tatooine that’s aiming at the Child. Boba found her dying in the desert and saved her life so she swears to help him. At a standstill where they all disarm, including Mando taking off his jetpack, Boba makes his attentions clear: he wants his armor back, which he would guarantee the two of them to safely leave the planet. Mando reluctantly agrees.
Then, shit hits the fan.
An Imperial shuttle lands, unleashing an onslaught of Stormtroopers. What happens next is an intense firefight between the three hunters and Imperial troops. Mando and Fennec have their weapons (except the jetpack) and engage in ranged combat with the troopers. Boba takes a different approach using guerilla warfare and demolishing the enemy with his giant, skull crushing staff. They fight well too, with everyone getting their moment to shine, but this is Boba’s show. He is just straight up ruthless. After gruesomely slaughtering a Stormtrooper, he finds himself next to the Razor Crest.
Just when things are looking better, another shuttle arrives. Mando goes back to Grogu to see if he’s done, but the Child is still meditating. He tells the kid to stay there while he goes to fight. Just as he leaves, Grogu stops meditating and passes out. Aw, poor guy’s pooped.
Mando is back to fighting side by side with Fennec, and they are surrounded, until the playing field is leveled. Boba Fett is back with his Mandalorian Armor. This is everything anyone could have imagined for the famed bounty hunter, who even shoots down the two shuttles that have retreated..
Just when you think it’s over, a missile barrels down to the sky and blows up the Razor Crest!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Boba goes into Slave I to investigate.
Who would have done this? Well, an Imperial Starcruiser belonging to you know who, Moff Gideon (Giancarlo Esposito). He sends down new forces, called the Dark Troopers. These are Iron Man-like robots that fly down and capture our boy!! Mando and Fennec run but, without the jetpack, are too late.
All hope is lost.
Mando rummages through what’s left of his ship and finds the metal ball Grogu loved playing with and his Beskar spear. Everything else is destroyed. The whole thing is just heartbreaking.
Boba Fett and Fennec are waiting for Mando, and, when Din comes back to them, Fett shows him that the coding in the armor proves his ownership. In fact, we learn that Jango Fett was a foundling (much like Din) and fought in the Mandalorian Civil Wars!
Mando is satisfied that the armor is back to its rightful owner and says the deal is complete. However, Boba and Fennec say their part is not held up just yet. The safety of the Child must be secured, meaning the Hunters Three will travel together. Slave I goes back to Nevarro, and Mando asks Cara Dune (Gina Carano), now a Republic Marshal for help. He wants to know the whereabouts of Mayfeld (Bill Burr), the bounty hunter Mando worked with once. He plans to spring him out of jail to track Gideon’s ship. Cara is not a fan, but that changes when she finds out they have taken the Child.
Finally, we are left with the most gut wrenching scene. A tired Grogu fighting off troopers with the force before passing out. Gideon toys with him and shows off the Darksaber. He orders one of the Stormtroopers to shoot a stun ray thing at the Child, causing Grogu to pass out. They put tiny shackles on him, officially making him a prisoner. With the asset in hand, Gideon requests that Dr. Pershing be contacted so the experiments from season one can continue again.
Geez, I’m sorry guys, but I need a minute.
Okay, what a powerful episode. It’s hard to say anything bad about this episode, especially the powerhouse duo of Jon Favreau penning the episode and industry legend Robert Rodriguez directing. The episode is a flowing masterpiece, showing the end product of an excellent union of filmmaking on all levels.
One thing that really needs to be heralded is the beautiful score of Ludwig Göransoon. This man has really had fun with the series, crafting a stunning composition to compliment the world of the Mandalorian. This is especially effective in the Grogu prison scene, it breaks my heart over and over again.
The action was phenomenal too, and I think this episode finally restored some faith into the Boba Fett lore, showing the bounty hunter in his element. The man is a certified badass, and pre and post donning the armor was such a joy to watch.
Now, the layout of the land is revealed for the season, and we have a lot ahead of us. Springing Mayfield out of jail and tracking the S.O.B.’s that took our baby boy! Also, what Jedi will we see in the coming episodes. Grogu’s meditation was not for nothing so I can only assuming we will see a cloaked knight come in to help save the day. Maybe we get Ahsoka Tano again, maybe the internet gets its wish with a Sebastian StanLuke Skywalker, or maybe even an appearance from everyone’s favorite Jedi that just got his own series.
Only time will tell, and I’m all for it. Protect Grogu at all costs!
Mando and the Child find their way to Corvus, a forest planet that sees Tano confronting Magistrate Morgan Elsbeth (Diana Lee Inosanto), the authoritarian ruler of the city of Calodan. Elsbeth has been torturing her citizens, and Tano seeks to end her reign of terror, in addition to finding out her master’s location. The Magistrate has one day to do so.
Enter the Razor Crest. The Mandalorian (Pedro Pascal) and The Child land and go to Calodan, where they speak with the Magistrate. Elsbeth proposes that if Mando can kill the Jedi, she will give him a Beskar spear as a reward. Without confirming, Mando takes the coordinates and goes off to find Ahsoka. The Mandalorian finally locates Ahsoka and, after a brief skirmish, tells her that Bo-Katan Kryze sent him. Now in a truce, the moment we are waiting for finally arrives: Ahsoka meets the Child.
The Jedi spends some time with the Child, and it is revealed that she is communicating with him using the Force. Now comes something we didn’t expect but are happy to finally know: the Child’s name is Grogu! This is ballsy, in my opinion, because the pressure of revealing his name must have been heavy, but they seemed to hit the nail on the head. We find out his backstory too, as he was raised and trained at the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. After the Republic fell, Grogu was hidden and has been concealing his powers over the years to not be found.
The revelation is so satisfying, but a wrench is thrown in Mando’s plans with the Jedi refusing to train Grogu. During a Force exercise, she tries to get him to use the Force, but he is disinterested. She asks Mando to try, and the Child happily participates. Because of this, Tano says she won’t train Grogu. His strong attachment to Mando worries her, due to the potential of Grogu going to dark side, since her master did the same *hint hint it’s Anakin hint hint.* Mando tries to convince her otherwise and makes a deal: if he helps her confront Elsbeth, she will train Grogu. She silently accepts.
The Jedi/Mando duo infiltrate Calodan, disposing of the Magistrate’s troops and liberating the city. This leads to Ahsoka to have her final confrontation with Elsbeth. The two battle, with lightsaber versus Beskir Spear. Finally, the Jedi prevails and questions a subdued Elsbeth about the whereabouts of her master, Grand Admiral Thrawn.
DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNN
So now we have it: a freed city, an evil Magistrate defeated, and a deal to be upheld. Mando goes to his ship to retrieve Grogu and has to wake up the little fellow. It’s time for goodbyes, and it’s heartbreaking. I don’t care what anyone says, Pedro Pascal has been doing amazing work in this show. The amount of emotion he portrays through sheer body language and tone of voice is excellent. I really felt for him in the moment. But, it isn’t goodbye just yet (also we are like halfway through the season, so, yeah).
Ahsoka shows up to the Razor Crest. She says that Grogu sees Mando as a father so she still refuses to train him. He is upset she won’t hold up her side of the deal, but she offers him information as a consolation.
On the planet Tython, there are the ruins of an ancient Jedi temple. The Mandalorian must bring Grogu to the top of it so he can call out to another Jedi using the Force. She says this because, at that moment, Grogu will choose his fate: either he follows the way of the Force or sticks with Daddy Din.
With this knowledge, the Mando and Grogu are on their way.
Wow, what an episode. I think this is easily the best episode of season 2 so far, and it delivered on sooo many levels.
First of all, the action in this episode was amazing. It was really refreshing to see a lightsaber user feel competent again. Mando, of course, is phenomenal with his Western quickdraw dopeness and strategic use of gadgets. During his little skirmish with Tano, it was really cool seeing the two different fighting styles contrasting. But back to Tano, man, the two lightsabers was such a beauty to watch. This was highlighted in her final fight with the Magistrate, which gave me shades of a double lightsaber versus a double-bladed lightsaber fight.
In addition, this show just constantly reminds us how Star Wars is so visually compelling. The small details really sell every scene. I don’t care if I cause waves with this, but the show is the next best thing after the original movie trilogy (suck it Abrams). Then, we have the little one, the Child, dear dear Grogu. I would die defending this bundle of joy. Finding out his backstory was a lot of fun, and it gives a bit of depth and levity to his actions. He has been forced to survive on his own and hide the Force, so naturally he enjoys the freedom of being with Mando and doing his thang. It is refreshing to see him in scenes that are not just played for comic effect. Love it, love it, love it.
Also, I think this episode essentially gave us the scope of the rest of the season and the set-up for the finale. I’m imagining Grogu on the top of the Temple making his decision while Moff Gideon (Giancarlo Esposito) arrives. He and Mando defeat the Breaking Baddie, and they choose to stay together as a Clan of Two. Uggh, can’t wait.
Chris Colombus, the director of gems such as Home Alone and Mrs. Doubtfire, might just be mentally stuck in the 1990s in this holiday schlockfest.
A couple of years ago I reviewed The Chrismas Chronicles, a Kurt Russel action-hero flick disguised as a Christmas holiday movie. An odd blend of Hallmark family moments that paid homage to Kurt Russel’s action hero career in movies like Escape New York,what made the movie oddly fantastic was in its tough-guy Santa Claus. A man all about checking things off his naughty list in really funny and oddly entertaining ways.
Which is why it’s incredibly befuddling that The Christmas Chronicles 2 does away with all of that in the first half-hour of this nearly two-hour movie. Instead, focusing in on its supporting characters, with a boring plot about embracing new types of family, and little motivation or pull outside the awestricken Santa lore this movie tries desperately to establish. For some very strange reason, this movie is less action-hero and more outright fable fantasy. Like a terrible version of Lord of the Rings or even the movie Thor, as this sequel’s entire drive lies in its overdone CGI and more importantly, its Christmas magic.
There is a lot of magical fantasy in this movie that nobody asked for in any way, shape, or form. Items like the elven forged Star of Bethlehem, Santa’s natural acumen for Christmas Sourcery, and tons-and-tons of elves. Cute Furby-looking Pikmen Smurfs, which are creatures with their own language and culture, and even have a Gargamel type of character taken off the Belshnickel of lore. Which reminded me about that episode of The Office. An episode which I honestly wished I had been watching instead, several times throughout this movie.
In the original Christmas Chronicles, Kate and Teddy Pierce, after losing their father, go on a quest to help Santa Claus finish delivering presents to children across the world. Hijinks ensue but ultimately they save Christmas. All in a simple plot completely driven by Kurl Russel’s Santa.
In this one, it’s less about saving the day and more about all-out warfare (yes I’m just as confused by that sentiment as you are)? As a story unfolds about how the talented Belshnickel the elf (played by Julian Dennison) pulled a Lucifer against Santa, believing himself better than the humans his kind slaved away for. In turn, he was cursed and turned into the one thing he hates the most: humans. Saddened by this Belshnickel seeks to usurp Santa’s role and desires to create his own Chrismas empire in the South Pole.
It’s ridiculous. But it doesn’t fully ruin a movie in a title such as this. So to make it even better, the story begins in a bizarre plot in Cancun Mexico where Kate spends Christmas with her potentially new stepbrother, Jack. Kate doesn’t like her mom’s new boyfriend and somewhere along the lines, the themes of embracing new family and change come to mind.
Well, Belshnickel ambushes Kate and Jack, hitching a ride to the North Pole to execute his plan to steal the Star of Bethlehem. Which for some reason, has nothing to do with Jesus and everything to do with empowering Santa’s village with magic. Also, Santa really is the literal Saint Nicholas, who not only gifted presents to the good, but also led a Moses-like exodus of the Elves into the North Pole, as an Elven Messiah of righteousness.
And sure, I can explain to you how Kate’s mom is trying to get their life on together, or how what’s-his-face, the boy who was the main character spends all of his time on the beach with some hot girlfriend he’s made completely ignoring a majority of this story (which is sort of what we wished we were donig), or how Kate, who still desperately seeks to remember her dad this Christmas, ends up pulling a Back-To-The-Future where she meets her dad in the 1990s all while Santa generates the holiday cheer in a rockin’ tribute to power his Sleigh DeLorean and get back to the future. But none of this really matters does it because you know just as well as I do, this movie has gone off the rails.
Still Considering Watching This… Really?
Well if you need more detracting reasons, there’s also excessive amounts of CGI, a Goldie Hawn Mrs. Claus who doesn’t know why she’s in this movie outside of motivating the token black kid, and Jola, the angry Christmas cougar. Oh and there’s a drug called Elfsbane that gets the Elves high and turns them into murderous zombies, in a beautifully cookie-filled action sequence accompanied by the masterful musical workings of The Baha Men’s, “Who Let The Dogs Out?”
It occurred to me that this movie feels an awful lot like a failed script written by Colombus in the year 2003. Especially, given all the ridiculous references to the Will Ferrell classic, along with the movie Bad Santa, both unsurprisingly, 2003 Christmas movies.
I will say though that even though this was in no way a good movie by modern standards, as a mindless Christmas film… I actually think it still does enough to get the job done. Because honestly, for holiday movies the plot doesn’t really matter, and for what it’s worth, I think the actors did the best with the material, boring and ridiculous as it may be. If you hold it up to Hallmark standards 5/5 high-quality entertainment for the kids, hands down. Just be ready for the disappointment if you wanted more Kurt Russel action like I did.
This movie reminds me of The Babysitter sequel. A sleeper hit with a semi-built in audience featuring a bigger actor that ended up being downplayed in the sequel. Whereas Babysitter virtually all but axed Samara Weaving, Christmas Chronicles at least kept Kurt Russel, albeit in a slightly smaller role. Though where he and Goldie Hawn take the stage is where this movie shines and becomes semi-bearable in a cute way. Downright fun too if you’re into corny Christmas moments of song, dance, and cheer.
The Take
If you love ludicrous Hallmark movies with sentimental moments layered with too much sweetness, watch it. If you love Christmas movies watch it. Otherwise, I’d skip it.
In season 2 episode 4 of The Mandalorian, Mando and the Child make a pitstop to repair the Razor Crest, and reunite with some old friends for another adventure.
Though I was really excited to meet Ahsoka Tano, Chapter 12 of the Mandalorian, “the Siege” gave us the only detour that would have made me okay with waiting another week, a return to Nevarro.
With the Razor Crest needing more repairs, we are reunited with Cara Dune (Gina Carano) and Greef Karg (Carl Weathers). Karg puts his best mechanic on it, who is clearly a shady alien not happy to see Din (Pedro Pascal) and the Child on Nevarro. Besides that, it’s really heartwarming to see the two of them again, especially since they are much happier than when we last left them. Karg is running the town, while Cara is the town’s Marshal, finding a nice natural fit after fighting in the wars and running. It’s also enjoyable seeing their reaction to the Child after all this time.
Nevarro is also looking better than we last left it, as it has flourished with trade due to it being an almost a fully peaceful planet. We even seeMythrol (Horatio Sanz), the alien from Chapter 1, who is working for Karg. The only remaining issue with Nevarro is a remaining Imperial base. Cara and Karg asked Djin for his help, and he reluctantly accepts to help his friends destroy it. Mythrol tags along for good measure too! But, before they go, the Child is placed in a school class to keep safe, which is super adorable and shows us a little force action that we haven’t seen yet all season.
As the group infiltrates the Imperial base, they find that there are still a good amount of troops stationed there AND there is a lab where experiments were being performed to create beings using the Child’s blood. It’s obvious that the Empire wanted to replicate the Child’s force-using ability, which is why they wanted him in the first place.
Mando worries about the Child, who is safely hiding in a small school and leaves ahead of the rest of his group to get him. Karg, Cara, and Mythrol escape the base, which they successfully destroy by agitating the base’s lava core reactor. But, the action isn’t over as they have to outrun some TIE fighters in an exciting chase that ends up with a newly fixed Razor Crest saving the day.
The Mandalorian and Baby Yoda leave to continue their journey for Corvus, but we learn towards the end of the episode that the shady mechanic is actually working with the Empire! Never trust a shady mechanic. We learn he put a tracking device on the Razor Crest so Moff Gideon (Giancarlo Esposito) can follow them and retrieve the Child.
The episode was so much fun to watch and really made me yearn for the first season. My heart felt so warm seeing the old gang together. Carl Weathers, who directed the episode, did a fantastic job giving us a fun ride.
Also, the opening scene with Baby Yoda trying to help Mando with ship repairs was sooo adorable. Like, ugh, my heartstrings.
Also, also, I wanted to give a shoutout to Paul Sun-Hyung Lee, who is making his second appearance in the show as an X-Wing captain. I’m a big fan of his work in Kim’s Convenience, and it’s great to see him in other work.
Ah the three leads take one last longing look.
image c/o imdb.com
The Supernatural series finale is finally here. Did it satisfy? I’d say, mostly yes.
While writing the reviews for this final season, I will admit to having a kind of hate-watch attitude. This show has been on A LONG time. Fifteen seasons, as I’ve pointed out (probably to the point of exhaustion) is ridiculous. But, I will give them credit where credit is due – they managed to create and maintain a show with two main leads for fifteen years. That’s not an easy feat. You know how many ensemble shows lose powerful leads for any number of reasons in a far less number of seasons? My kudos goes out to the entire cast and crew of Supernatural.
With that out of the way, let’s get to the review of this, our final episode. Is it as good as the original series finale waaaay back in season five? No. Is it horrible? No. Actually, in a weird way, things kind of come full circle. I mean, except for the death stuff.
This will be a quick recap because overall not a lot happens in this episode. Remember, they got the big bad (God/Chuck) out of the way in the penultimate, which leaves us with a return to form of sorts for the series. Sam and Dean, no longer the puppets of fate (though, fate was a character way back in the series and definitely has a hand in what happens yet somehow isn’t vilified the way God is…), are free to live their lives however they choose. And they choose…to continue being hunters! Why? I have no fucking idea. Like, seriously. But, whatever, they end up going out on a routine call that happens to tie back to big daddy Winchester, and Dean dies in the process of culling a nest of vampires.
Dean’s death is respectable in that it is surprising. Not to us, I would think anyone watching should see this coming, but to him. We follow him on his last day, waking up, going through his normal routine (Sam too), and even getting some pie! Then, they catch a case, and suddenly things take a turn. You are lured into thinking the vampires will kill him, but no, fate gets her revenge when Dean’s life is snuffed out by a protruding piece of metal that impales him from behind…when a vampire pushes him into it. His death scene is meant to be touching and emotional, and I wanted to feel something…I really did, but at this point, I just can’t. Like I said, the most believable aspect of this is that it’s accidental and unexpected. Neither Sam or Dean is prepared for this moment, not so soon after the big win (though, I’m not too sure when exactly this happens on the timeline). Dean handles it like a champ though, which is where I feel the need to call bullshit. On the other hand, shock can make you pain-free, so maybe Dean’s incredibly calm surrender into the night isn’t unrealistic. I’m not a nurse or a medical professional. Still, his acceptance of the situation is odd. Maybe if this has happened a few seasons back when they were on a losing streak, or when Dean was noticeably tired of being alive, he would have welcomed death, but after the day he had!? I really was expecting more anger about how unfair it is for him to die like this. Oh well.
In any event, Dean dies, Sam gives him a hunter’s funeral and then goes onto the next case – care of a random phone call to one of Dean’s many phones. Part of me was thinking Sam would die on that case, but he doesn’t. In fact, Sam looks largely confused and lost when Dean dies. This bothers me because in one of the previous episodes, Sam is shown trying to rekindle his romance with Eileen, to the point that he is rushing to “save” her when Chuck dusts her. You’re telling me that when him and Dean are given true free will he never thought to call her up? When Dean dies and he could have retired from hunting and gotten with her, he doesn’t!? And yes, realistically this is probably because the actress who plays Eileen wasn’t available for such a cameo, but come on…you could have gotten a look alike – and don’t go telling me that lady who was all fuzzy in the background in Sam’s growing old montage was her, because if it was supposed to be her it was a terrible likeness. Also, also, I was wrong…he has a boy. Though, that prediction did come with the contingency that he got with Eileen, not some rando (and that Dean lived long enough to have a son, er, adopted son at least).
Getting back on track: Sam grows old and dies…of old age. His son, Dean, conveniently tells him the same words Dean (dead brother this time) asked him to speak when he was dying back in that vamp nest. It’s stupid, and cheesy, and I’m not a fan. But, I get it. TV and movies do that shit all the time.
Now, before Sam dies, when he goes off on that case, we pivot our attention to Dean. Dean goes to Heaven and things have changed quite a bit. Jack wasn’t a fan of the “best of your golden oldies” as Bobby puts it, instead setting up Heaven as a kind of retirement community, for lack of a better term. I have to say, as much as I hate Jack, this is a good change. Instead of living with the memories of people you loved when you were alive, you can actually go visit them and hang out with them whenever you like. Granted, if they aren’t dead, you need to patiently wait for them to join you, and there’s no mention made of whether Hell is still a thing, but Bobby does explain that time works differently in Heaven. Additionally, somehow, Jack got Cass out of the Empty. I mean, he is God/The Darkness, so it’s not entirely unbelievable, but given how mad the Empty got when Death scooped Jack up out of there, I don’t see how our toe-headed Jesus stand-in did it without pissing the cosmic crank off.
Lastly, Sam dies, as I mentioned, of old age. We don’t get to see him reunite with Bobby, only with Dean, and that reunion is how our series ends. Dean, driving on a bridge, stops to get out and admire the view before realizing that Sam has finally joined him in the afterlife. It’s a touching moment (I’m sure lots of fans went through plenty of tissues), bringing the series to end where it began – with the two brothers reuniting after a long absence that ultimately was caused by the family business. This time, however, there is no surprise, just joy and relief.
Probably my biggest complaint about this finale would be the pacing. Too much time is spent on setting up the monster-of-the-week aspect that leads to Dean’s death. Even the last minute cameo from an old, not so familiar face (Jenny played by Christine Chatelain) is largely a waste of our time. Look, I know endings are hard, Chuck said as much in the original series finale. You can’t please all of the people, that’s impossible, but as “The Long Road Home” clip-show series roundup before this episode expressed – the makers of this show felt a huge loyalty to the characters themselves vs the audience. I have no doubt most fans will enjoy this ending and see it as a fitting final episode for their beloved series. I love that they died, I had asked for it and was pretty much expecting it as a just ending to their journey, so I’m very glad it happened. That being said, more attention could have been paid to either Sam’s life after Dean, or Dean’s exploration of new Heaven, over doing the usual set up of their last case. But hey, as was clearly indicated at the beginning of these reviews: we’re just shotgun to this story and shotgun? We shut our cake-holes.
Thanks for fifteen years, Supernatural, it really is amazing what you managed to accomplish. I’m glad that writers and showrunners who worked on you went on to stretch their creative wings in shows like The Magicians, and The Boys (fun fact: Jensen Ackles will be joining the cast in the next season!). I look forward to seeing what else they come up with, because when this show was good it was fantastic. It was bold, and unpretentious, and silly, and tongue-in-cheek witty. That’s the Supernatural I fell in love with. And, while you didn’t give me as great highs in the last…I’d say three or four years, I’m still glad I stuck with you!
Sam, Dean, Jack and Michael planning it out.
image c/o showbizjunkies.com
The penultimate episode of our long running series starts off slow but picks up quickly!
At first we’re looking at an abandoned Earth filled with just Sam, Dean, and Jack. The boys are understandably upset so much so that they attempt to surrender to God in an effort to bring everyone back. Naturally, God being the petty dick he is, would rather watch Sam and Dean suffer alone on an empty planet forced to live with the consequences of their pride until their deaths (gotta hand it to him, that’s a damn fine use of passive aggression). Even when Dean finds a dog – on the trail of a presence Jack sensed – God shows up to dust the poor pooch away. “You get nothing!” Willy Wonka would be proud.
That presence I mentioned? It was Michael. He’s fully formed – sorry Adam but you’re out! He’s willing to help the boys in destroying God, but he can’t open Death’s book. You know who can? The new Death (H & G not ugly Betty, played by Kimberley Sustad)! She shows up thanks to Lucifer, who gains entry into the bunker by pretending to be Cass, and claims to have been sent by the Empty to assist in the God killing. It’s a genuinely surprising moment given that the actor who plays Michael has a credit in the beginning, so we knew he was coming (or at the very least Adam, but Michael was the better bet), but there was no such spoiler for Lucifer!
Anyway, Lucifer, as always, is a turncoat and just wanted to get the book for daddy. Michael winds up finally killing his brother as was always supposed to be the case, but he too betrays the Winchesters for Chuck’s approval. This culminates in a fantastic beat-down care of the Divine Father. I mean, honestly, isn’t this what God’s been wanting to do to these two since the beginning of this season?
Allow me a brief aside to say that God’s use of people’s love for him and need for his love is spectacular. Seriously, this dude treated his children like shit, and yet both of them – even the rebel who claimed to hate him sooooo much – were willing to sell out humanity to get back in his good graces. Although this might say less of their love for God and more for their hatred of mankind – specifically Sam and Dean. Afterall, Lucifer has no real reason to be loyal to the brothers. They tried to kill him repeatedly, and while his major contribution to the series appears to be Jack, his son doesn’t hold much affection for him either. Killing the boys makes perfect sense. Michael, conversely, was only tied to the Winchesters by Adam, and because Dean was his ultimate vessel. He also has no real reason to side with them. Again, consider that throughout most of the series, Michael is bad mouthed by Dean, gets cast into the cage with Lucifer because of Cass, and when Sam’s soul is rescued from the cage Adam’s isn’t. If I were Michael, I’d definitely choose my father over a pair of brothers who fuck over just about every divine being they’ve come into contact with.
Right, back to the synopsis. Sadly, everything was according to a plan. If you were paying attention towards the end of the last episode, Jack’s got a bit of a weird new kink. At some point this power is explained to the Winchesters (not us, clearly), and it helps them devise a plan to take out Chuck for good. See, they realize that Michael is still a daddy’s boy, and use this against him. Essentially, they sacrifice two archangels, and allow themselves to be nearly killed at God’s hands in order for Jack to power up enough to take down the Big Guy. I’m a bit bothered by them being able to pull off this Ocean’s 11 ending only because, as a previous episode reiterated, God is omniscient. He should be able to see anything and everything coming – moreso now with Amara’s power added to his own. I was really hoping for something better from this series, but oh well. Like all the rest it lets the heroes win “because”. I did like that God’s ultimate punishment was to wind up a lowly human being. Powerless, meaningless, and subject to all the pitfalls of being alive.
Their ace in the hole? Jack. He’s a power syphon. Absolutely no explanation is given for this other than it appears to be a side effect of him surviving the explosion that didn’t take out The Empty. My prediction that Jack might become the new God isn’t wrong, and by the end of the episode he’s restored all of the people and creatures that Chuck dusted. This also means he won’t be buddy, buddy with Sam and Dean anymore. He’s gonna be more of an observer than a writer.
So…now what? The ending montage gives the viewer the impression that this is actually the series finale, as opposed to the prelude to the finale, but there is in fact one episode left. Definitely curious where it will take us. As a rule, series endings tend to follow two trajectories when it comes to the final two episodes: Either A – the second to last episode builds up to a beautiful cliffhanger climax that is resolved in the final episode’s first half, with the second half reserved for epilogue type storyline tie-ups. Or B – the second to last episode resolves the big beautiful build up climax that had been set up at least an episode before, and the last episode’s entirety is dedicated to epilogue style storyline tie-ups. Either option can also include any definitive final moments speaking to the show and characters being put soundly to rest, or any lingering storylines left open speaking to the show and characters possibly coming back one day for further exploration.
Given that Sam and Dean now have actual free will, and that our conflict resolution was fairly bloodless in terms of main character sacrifices, my bet will be on a finale dedicated to showing the boys living their lives post Jack and God, with the ending message one of possible return. But who knows, maybe I’ll be wrong. Maybe it’ll pick up years, and years later when Sam and Dean are on their deathbed and at last get to reunite with all their friends…except for Cass cause The Empty don’t play. Or maybe they’ll die and get made into angels by Jack. The possibilities abound.
I will say, if they don’t die – peacefully or otherwise – I’ll be a little disappointed. Not because I necessarily hate Sam and Dean, but because I think after everything they’ve been through and done throughout the series, death should be the end for them. If you want to go ahead and visit the series ten or twenty years down the line, have at it, but do it with their progeny – I have to think Sam and Eileen have a girl, while Dean maybe gets back together with Lisa and it’s Ben who takes up the helm of his old man. I dunno, something to shake up this sausage fest of a series (and yes, haters, I will be coming back to this once the show is over so gird your loins now).
