They say never meet your heroes. I think that’s fair game, but I also think you should. I say never completely emulate your heroes. Inspiration through their medium is beautiful and may one day land you that dream job you’ve always wanted… but nobody should be a complete copy of someone else. We are not machine people. We possess unique flaws and have unique thoughts. Imitating a hero is a task in of itself and you may never live up to that standard you’d set in your mind. For those, you are Xero copy and could land you in a position you did not want to be in or ask for. Welcome to the Dave Holstein writ, Michel Gondry helmed episode of Kidding (Showtime), “The Death of Fil.”
“Only entropy comes easy.” – Anton Chekov
We open up in Manila, Philippines. Two cops enter. One bilks free snacks and the other looks on as a troop of girls are besotted by a live Puppet Time. As the Filipino Mr. Pickles, Ginoo Pickles (GlennThomas Cruz) among his off-set looking Pickle Pals, including Blastonutter, a cousin to Aston-Otter. Get it?
So police fully armed with semi-autos break the fuck in Mr. Pickles domicile and fuck shit up. According to the law of the land, divorce is NOT for the best. In fact, it’s downright illegal. As Astonutter is hit in the face, John Q. law puts a black bag over Mr. Pickles’ head, carry him to the top of his studio, throwing him off to his demise.
Back in the States, as Jeff (Jim Carrey) is interviewed by 60 Minutes’ Lesley Stahl. He asserts that his last episode sent a positive message that homes don’t truly break, they change. Jeff is informed of the international incident involving Fil and questioned on whether he feels responsible. This gives him a sudden pause, as Jeff wasn’t aware that overseas, this deceased proxy is simply called Filipino Pickles.
As Deidre clues Jeff into the grievous details of the event, Jeff learns that there won’t be a service for Ginoo Pickles. His own homeland refuses the internment of his corpse in their soil, thus a waterlogged grave will be waiting for him at sea.
Deidre (Catherine Keener) tries to hash things out with Seb (Frank Langella), who already is furious over his own demise at the company along with the impudence of Jeff going forward with the listen-to-me Pickles toy. Turning on the TV, Seb shows Didi a commercial with Snagglehorse and Stacy Keach reverse mortgages. Fuming, Seb gives the advice to not let Jeff attend the burial at sea and blames her for the whole mess since her first stab on-air as Showrunner was a very heartfelt and necessary but very irresponsible move on her part. Deidre is taking the reigns on cleaning up this shit storm.
After hearing some of the voice messages some VERY pissed parents have left through his toy, Jeff goes next door to pick up his passport. He’s fully intent on making this right. As Peter (Justin Kirk) paints the exterior of their house, he asks Jeff on whether he would co-invest in an Affenpinscher for the sake of breeding. Jeff is on board. Peter also asks Jeff what he thinks of taking Jill and Will on a vacation. He wants to propose to Jill. Relenting, Jeff gives him his blessing, though he’d rather not have will there.
Proceeding into the house, Jeff finds Jill (Judy Greer). Though Jeff is now on good terms with Peter, the pained expression painted on Jeff’s face speaks volumes. Before leaving, Jeff convinces Jill to take the time off from work to go on vacation. Rifling through the three passports, Jeff sees Will’s.
Back at school, Will (Cole Allen) and his new girlfriend, Havana (Jenna Z. Alvarez) talk briefly on how his dad may have killed a guy before Havana asks him to buy her some ‘Skitties’, Cassidy is annoyed… that is until Havana shows her up and drops the mic with a ‘fuck you Cassidy.’
In the science lab where B.D. (Coda Boesel) and Gigs (Juliocesar Chavez) sip high-tea, Will tells him he’s thoroughly convinced he might be magic due to the book of Mysticism appearing to work for him. The first date of the book being checked out was the number of the house of the kid who inherited Phil’s eyes and the second check out date was the number of Skittles that he’s the owner of. Will’s convinced that it cannot be a coincidence, to which Gigs disagrees due to the dates going forward and not backward in time. B.D. counters with the numbers simply being treated as numbers go down, not up and can be construed as Fibonacci numbers, numbers that have a direct connection to nature and biology. The numbers could be working for him. Jeff picks Will up, as he always does and he’s informed that Will would be joining him on his sojourn to the middle of the South China Sea.
In a helicopter containing the Picarillo family, a film crew from 60 Minutes and one large Pickle Barrel, Will seems impressed, thinking that his father has a pretty cool job. Jeff asserts to his son that no matter what happens, Will is of two families: Picarillo and Pickles as he hands him his own signature green tie. This to me this is slightly unsettling, as it gave vague vibes of grooming. Seb apologizes to Deidre and gives her props on how she’s running the show.
“It was the Law of the Sea, they said. Civilization ends at the waterline. Beyond that, we all enter the food chain, and not always right at the top.” -Hunter S. Thompson
On the giant vessel, multiple Pickles from around the globe send their quite literal fallen brethren with a solemn “See You At The Bottom.” Jeff goes last with a brief but elegant eulogy partially in the departed’s native tongue and with one final push of the Barrel, Ginno Pickles is now part of the briny deep… which is where Jeff might end up, as he continues his speech, with the rest of the Pickles International family turning on Jeff live on air. Deidre is put on the spot by New Pickles-san (Arnold Chun) for fucking his brother.
The Pickles mob is really growing truly ugly. Why should they be forced to repeat what Jeff has to say? It got one of own killed in a country known for its militant Catholicism. Will comes to Jeff’s defense in impressive Spanish. They don’t give a fuck. A pickle is chucked at him. But what hurts more than that? All their signature green ties or cravats being thrown down on the floor in solidarity. Their god is dead… but hey! They got a case of Vodka! Seb encourages this delinquent behavior as Didi looks on in horror.
Back in the cabin, Will assures his dad that Mr. Pickles didn’t kill someone, gravity did. Jeff finds this comforting. Extracting from his jacket pocket the library card, he notices the next date of the checkout matching a buoy staring out at him from the porthole. Will has faith except that his mother is getting remarried and upon second look, the number on the buoy wasn’t the number on his card.
Topside, things have gone from terrible to sheer chaos. Binge drinking, lewd behavior, Deidre is lost. She is confronted by Australian Pickles (Gina Torrecilla) and Monsieur Cornichon (Michael Lanahan), the former of which is pissed off by the sudden change of characters due to the sudden loss of them and the latter getting hit by Deidre for talking out of line due to her wifely duties or lack thereof.
Deidre at this point goes into Give-Zero-Fucks mode, tossing out the 60 Minutes camera and the dude’s cell phone. New Pickle-san flirts with Smorgas Gurka (Charlotta Mohlin) but a drunk Seb cuts in and scoops her up. Pickle-san goes up to Didi and because the Japanese have a familial sense of duty, he threatens her.
Back in the less debauched section of the vessel, a very angry Will and a very acquiescent Jeff have a heart to heart… and by heart to heart, Will proposes Jeff ‘em wit da hee. Of course, Jeff’s going to say no and Will storms off.
On deck, Deidre runs away from Pickle-san. She tries to take refuge in a bathroom, but we know Seb’s getting some. Didi storms away. Will runs through the carnage and as Mr. Pickles Original Flavor runs after them, they all chant “murderer” at him.
Deidre’s hiding, Seb gives her the thumbs up. It’s Will’s last stand. This is the one Mr. Pickles that would break everything he’s tried to hold on us far. Who would’ve thought a tie dropping hitting the floor could be so goddamned loud?
The episode devolving into unbridled chaos is a prime example of an idol’s reach from exceeding his grasp. You can’t control, no matter the purest of intentions what lie in the hearts and minds of others. You can only TRY to sternly stem the flow.
