Only two episodes left! Last week I thought the show might follow the traditions of Game of Thrones and have some wild plot twists this week, in the next to last show of the season. Well, nothing happened on the scale of the Red Wedding, but we had plenty of dragon-based shenanigans, so let’s get into it.
This week, the focus is primarily on the Blacks. The Hightower side is taking a bit of a breather. The maester, at Larys’ urging, is trying to speed along Aegon’s recovery. (I’m sure Larys has the best intentions of the king at heart and is in no way motivated by pique at Aemond for pushing him out of the council.) Alicent is nursing her scars from the riot last week – both physical and mental – and decides to take a trip to the woods with only her personal Kingsguard, and may be thinking about staying in the woods forever. (I get it. We all have bad days at work.)
Thanks to a timely assist by witchy Alys, Grover Tully, Lord Paramount of the Riverlands, has passed away and has been replaced by his grandson Oscar. (Oscar and Grover… you know, I never noticed that until now…) Oscar is young, but he shows a lot of spine. The other River Lords are furious at Lord Blackwood and by extension, Daemon. He gave the tacit order for Blackwood to go and raze the Brackens, and Lord Blackwood went on a full-out rape-murder-torture spree. Lord Oscar, in his first act, confirms that the River Men honor their oaths, and they swore loyalty to Rhaenyra, Viserys’ heir. However, he cannot promise that the other lords will muster an army if there is still outrage to deal with. Oscar gives it to Daemon plain. The King Consort must renounce his actions and dispense some justice. Daemon would rather be King than spare the life of Lord Blackwood, so chip-chop. And good for Oscar! Daemon thought he’d be a pushover but Oscar outmaneuvered him and got justice for the other lords.
Meanwhile, in Dragonstone, Rhaenyra has tracked down Seasmoke and his mystery rider, who we know to be Addam of Hull, Corlys’ bastard. He pledges fealty to Rhaenyra and tells of how Seasmoke chose him. Rhaenyra can’t believe it but invites him back to Dragonstone. (“Think you can fly there?” “I can try!” That’s the can-do spirit!) He pointedly does not mention who his father is, and neither does Corlys the Hand when he enters the council room. (Father of the Year, everybody.)
Rhaenyra is still trying to find other Targaryen cousins who might be willing to try to ride, but having no luck, when Mysaria suggests expanding her search since now she knows small folk can ride as well. Rhaenyra doesn’t get it, even when Mysaria mentions that she used to work in a pleasure house. Still nothing. Mysaria has to spell it out for the queen. Generations of Targaryen lords have visited the brothels and scattered their bastards everywhere. Rhaenyra seems to have a hard time believing it, both the bastards and that small folk could be dragon riders, and really? Your uncle-husband literally took you to a brothel on your first date. And you just had a small folk (well, not exactly but Rhaenyra doesn’t know that) fly in on Seasmoke. It seems shockingly myopic for someone who was just a week ago saying how they had to look for riders in unexpected places.
Places like the Vale of Arryn. Rhaena, still without a dragon of her own, has seen evidence of a wild dragon in the Vale (namely barbequed sheep corpses), which Lady Arryn confirms. As they leave to take the children to safer climes, Rhaena wanders away in search of this beast Hey, who knows? Maybe this one won’t devour her, the way Seasmoke tried to.
In King’s Landing, Mysaria sends word through her networks to let those bastards know that Rhaenyra is recruiting. Come to Dragonstone, and get your chance to claim a dragon. Word reaches Hugh Hammer. He’s been seen here and there throughout the season. He was a weapons smith who was trying to get payment from the king and also food for his daughter and he got locked into the city while he was trying to leave. His daughter is now dead, from disease and hunger, and so he figures he has nothing to lose. (His wife disagrees!) There’s also Ulf, who has been literally dining out on his secret Targaryen heritage for years. His pub mates are excited to tell him about the dragon quest. This is your chance, mate! Go claim your birthright! Ulf hems and haws, which makes his friends suspicious. Hey, you weren’t lying about that to get free drinks, were you? Ulf swallows hard and says, of course not! He’s going! He joins an extremely large group of blonde-haired bastards, making their way to the longboats commanded by Alyn of Hull (speaking of bastards…). There’s a lot of half-Targaryens and a lot of blonde wigs. They must have cleaned out every Party City in Eastern Europe.
Back at Dragonstone, Jacerys is pissed at this whole plan, angry that “mongrels” will get to ride the dragons. And look, I get that a significant part of the Targaryen’s mystique is tied to their ability to ride dragons, and yes, I get that they really want to make it seem mystical and special. But, damn Jacerys! Mongrels? Really? And honestly, he’s one to talk, given how everyone in the court questioned his parentage. Which, as it turns out, is at the root of his anger. He’s accepted that Ser Strong was his father, but he always clung to the fact that he could ride a dragon as proof that he was a true Targaryen. Now, if any random brothel wench or tavern drunk can ride a dragon, where does that leave him?
The dragon lords aren’t any better, calling it an “abomination” that these half-bloods are going to try and ride a precious, sacred, magical dragon, and walk out in a huff. (Dear Lord, this is a bit much.) This leaves Rhaenyra to say “Go get ’em, team!” before summoning Vermithor, aka The Bronze Fury, and… basically leaving them to have at it. (AWESOME teaching, Queen!)
As you might have guessed, it doesn’t go that well for most of them. Vermithor toasts the first brave bastard to come forward and then just starts going ham on the lot of them, devouring and squashing everyone. (In my mind, I really wanted to have this whole section be a montage that was set to Arianne Grande’s “thank u, next.” Or, even better, Weird Al’s polka version.)
As Vermithor rampages, torching and snacking on bastard Targaryens (hey look, Jace, he’s cleaning up the bloodline for you!), Hugh Hammer bravely steps forward to distract the Bronze Fury from munching on a young woman. And, wouldn’t you know it, it seems to inspire respect in Vermithor and they appear to bond. I guess his mom really was a lost sister of Viserys and Daemon!
Meanwhile, Ulf, the braggart from the tavern that we were all pretty sure was fibbing about being related to the Targaryens, runs through the catacombs until he stumbles in Silverwing’s nest, stomping on an egg. Whoops! Ulf lies back, ready to accept his fate as a Totino’s Pizza Roll when Silverwing starts to sniff at him. Huh! Guess he was telling the truth after all, since in the very next scene we see him joyriding Silverwing over King’s Landing and hanging on for dear life.
Aemond hears the cries of the guard as the dragon approaches. He pursues on Vhagar, across the sea towards Dragonstone, when he suddenly turns away. He is smart enough to see that it’s a trap. Rhaenyra is on the castle wall with Syrax, flanked by Hugh on Vermithor and Ulf on Silverwing. The balance of power has shifted again.
So, a quite exciting episode this week, although I am a bit repulsed by the outright racism and disgust Rhaenyra’s team seems to have for the bastards. (If you don’t want bastards, then have a maester make you a damn condom.) It really drives home one of the central themes of the season, namely how the small folk get the short end. But, now the son of a whore and a common drunk are riding some enormous beasts, so we will hopefully see some rich get eaten next week. (Eating the regent is praxis!)
Episode Rating: 4 out of 5
Who’s the worst? Jacerys, your mongrel comment rubbed me the wrong way. You “win” this week.
